Month: October 2023

The Low Spend Guide to Halloween 

GUEST POST – read on for the author’s bio

It’s officially spooky season! 

Halloween is one of the most magical times for many of us. Whether you have fond memories of trick-or-treating as a child. Enjoy donning your fancy dress outfits for a night out on the town or prefer to stay inside sipping a PSL, it’s always guaranteed to be lots of fun.

However, the holidays seem to become more heavily commercialised with every year that passes. New trends are always popping up around this season. Which tend to be bigger, better and usually, more expensive.

Enjoy a low buy Halloween and autumnal season without the pressure to spend excessively by using these three tips…

Here comes your Low Spend Guide to Halloween

Opt for activities instead of items

The supermarket aisles are filled to the brim with seasonal items during October. If you’re trying to reduce the overwhelm, steer clear of the temptation to buy, and focus on planning activities instead.

Some low-spend ideas to get you in the mood for the change of seasons could include:

  • Rotating your wardrobe, bringing out your comfiest jumpers and cosy socks, and storing your summer items away until next year
  • Taking a long woodland walk through the crunchy leaves
  • Binge-watching an autumnal TV series (If you haven’t seen Only Murders in the Building, this could be the perfect choice to watch it, whilst snuggled on the sofa!)
Low Spend Guide to Halloween

Get recipe testing

One of the best ways to embrace the colder evenings is to spend time perfecting a few tasty meals. Look out for new recipes to try which use seasonal ingredients. Such as butternut squash, mushrooms, pumpkin, apples or figs.

If you want some money-saving offers, check out this page

Warming vegetable soups with crusty bread are always a huge hit at this time of year, or try something a little different, like a butternut squash risotto.

If you’ve got experience in the kitchen, you could even try a Halloween-themed dish, such as pumpkin gnocchi or ravioli. Another option is to create mini pizzas or pies in spooky shapes.

For the cosiest family dessert, try making mini smores using tea lights, or perhaps a chocolate fondue!

Another tip, coming up in the Low Spend Guide to Halloween

DIY your decor

Instead of purchasing lots of Halloween-themed decor that is likely to be stored away for the majority of the year, only to see the light of day for one month of the year. How about making your own decorations instead?

Paper decorations are super cheap to make. And can either be folded flat and stored for next year, or recycled.

If you have small children, try heading outside with a bag and collecting dried leaves to make your own leaf crafts and projects. This could include garlands, collages or even puppets!

Another thrifty option is to collect any old glass jars and decorate them to make colourful tea light holders. This is a simple upcycle that the whole family can enjoy, and it’s free too.

Avoid adding to the clutter, and get your craft on this season!

Author bio

Taryn runs a money and lifestyle blog called ‘Saving in London City’ and is on a mission to share the best money-saving tips, tricks and hacks. Taryn discusses the best ways to have fun on a budget today, whilst also saving towards long-term money goals for your future, such as a house deposit or dream holiday.

Check out the blog

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Final Thoughts

I hope these tips help to remind you that it’s not necessary to spend your hard-earned cash in order to embrace the change in seasons!

Parenting: Preparing Your Kids for a Brighter Future

GUEST POSTread to the end for the author’s bio

Being a parent is challenging, especially when it comes to raising kids. As the world evolves, you want your kids to be ready for the outside world when they become adults. You want them to be strong, enough to adapt to the complex landscape, technological advancement, and unforeseen challenges. As parents, you want the next generation to have the skills, mindset, and resilience to thrive in an uncertain future. If they can grow up feeling brave no matter their situation, you have done your job. 

Let’s dive into Parenting: Preparing Your Kids for a Brighter Future

Parenting: Preparing Your Kids for a Brighter Future

Quick note: Some of the links contained on this page are affiliate links and if you go through them to make a purchase, I will earn a commission. I only recommend products I use myself and think would be useful for other people.

Here are some things you should look out for when Preparing Your Kids for a Brighter Future

FROM THE MCA BLOG – Shall we have some discount codes before we begin…

How to Secure Your Kids’ Future 

Effective Communication 

Communication is a difficult skill to master since adults struggle to master it, too. Without communication, you can’t understand the other person’s thoughts or wants. Kids are always curious more than adults, so you want to teach them how to express themselves clearly, actively listen, and collaborate with others. Without communication, how can your kids have good relationships with others? The reason why relationships are difficult to handle is because of poor communication skills. Raise your kids to express their thoughts confidently. 

Embrace Challenges 

Life isn’t perfect. There are many challenges and obstacles in life. As parents, you need to prepare your kids for the unknown future. You want your kids to be strong and face those challenges head-on. Help them see that a challenge is an exciting opportunity rather than something daunting. Even if they fail, you should cheer them on or encourage them that there will be a next time as the parent. By doing so, your kids can tackle a new and unfamiliar task in the future. This will help them to have a positive mindset and be problem solvers. 

FROM THE MCA BLOG – If you want to get started with selling on Vinted – you can find tips & standard promo wording to use, in ​this blog post​

Independence and Responsibility 

Part of Preparing Your Kids for a Brighter Future is nurturing learning and growing, so you want to give them simple tasks to learn from. You can give them simple chores like making the bed, wiping the table, or folding clothes. Giving them age-appropriate chores will instil a sense of responsibility and independence. Slowly, you can give them difficult tasks to do so they can have strong work ethic and the ability to manage tasks effectively. If you spoil them all the time, they will never know what independence and responsibility is when they are adult. 

Lifelong Learning

Most kids grow up thinking they don’t need to learn anymore after school. However, life is a journey full of the unknown. Your kids won’t know everything all the time. You want your kids always to be curious and keep questioning things about the world. Learning is not just confined to the classroom but a lifelong pursuit. Encourage your kids to explore various subjects so they can develop a habit of seeking information. Whether it’s dancing, singing, arts and crafts, or filming, your kids want to learn, encourage them to try and learn

FROM THE MCA BLOG – Parenting books to help you on your journey

Financial Literacy 

Not many kids grow up knowing anything about money. You don’t have to teach them the complex things but the basics so they understand how money works. The earlier they learn, the better off they will be. Don’t spoil them by giving them money for free because they will never want to do anything. Life isn’t free, so they should know how hard it is to get money. Let them understand what hard work is and being paid to do a service. 

FROM THE MCA BLOG – Want more money-saving tips – you can check out my money-saving hacks page:

Be Grateful 

Kids don’t know what being grateful is. When kids see what other kids have, they want it, too. Teaching your kids to be grateful is essential because it is the foundation of their emotional well-being. If you teach your kids to appreciate things, they will treasure what they have, not get entangled in materialism, and focus on contentment and personal growth. 

Implement Healthy Habits 

Teach your kids that health is a priority over anything else. Healthy habits are vital for kids and adults. Kids should get plenty of sleep, eat healthily, and stay active. With technology these days, kids don’t know what outside is. Don’t let them sit in the house, play video games, and watch YouTube all day. Create a schedule for them where they can stick to it. Kids should learn that health is an important factor in life and should not be ignored. By teaching them to make good choices, they will have a healthier lifestyle.

FROM THE MCA BLOG – My NEW Facebook group

Scan the QR code to join my exclusive Facebook Group, where you get the following:

– tips based on my highest engaging posts on social media – what works & what doesn’t

– standard wording templates I use for social media

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-self-care tips, affirmations, positive quotes, how to thrive in life (I need to remind myself of these daily tips too)

Build Relationships 

Having strong relationships with others is good for your children’s growth and well-being. In life, you can’t do everything by yourself. Teaching your kids to build healthy relationships by communicating effectively, resolving conflicts, and cooperating with others will lay the foundation for successful collaboration in the future. The world doesn’t revolve around just you but multiple people in the universe. 

FROM THE MCA BLOG – Recent posts on the blog

Be a Role Model 

If you set an example, your kids will follow. You are the leader that should lead your kids with pride. Kids look up to their parents the most, so whatever you do, you will greatly influence them. Kids often learn through observation, so whenever they observe an adult’s behaviour, they will follow. Whatever morals, values, behaviours, and skills you want your kids to have, you must teach them when they are young. Slowly, they will develop and become the person you want them to be. If you become a role model for them, they will become role models for others.

Creativity and Innovation 

Kids can be so creative sometimes. They think about things that not even adults know. As parents, you want to encourage your kids to follow their passions, think beyond conventional boundaries, and develop problem-solving abilities. By encouraging them, you empower them to be confident, independent thinkers better equipped to tackle the complexities and uncertainties of the future. 

In Summary

Parenting: Preparing Your Kids for a Brighter Future – Think About Your Kids!

No matter how hard life can be, your teachings are important to your kids. As parents, caregivers, and educators, you play a huge part in your kids’ lives, so lead them by example. They are the next generation, so you want them to prepare for the unknown. Every parent wants what’s best for their kids. If you want your kids to live happier, more fulfilling lives and become well-rounded, you must impart these valuable lessons. 

Author Bio

Cindy is the blogger behind Ordinary Asian Girl. She is your average Asian girl who wants to share relatable experiences that adults navigate daily. Whether it’s financial matters, thrilling adventures, or life’s intricate puzzles, she wants to share her experience and knowledge with all.

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Parenting: Preparing Your Kids for a Brighter Future

4 Ways to Minimise Your Car-Related Expenses

Minimise Your Car-Related Expenses

Unless you’ve been living under a rock, you’ll have noticed that everything seems to be getting more expensive at the moment. And as such, there’s a lot of value in working to keep your costs down to a minimum. After all, while you can’t eliminate some expenses entirely, there are usually things you can do that’ll help to reduce the cost — and that can have a big impact on your overall financial health.

In this post, we’re going to focus on reducing the costs of owning and using a car, which is one of the bigger expenses that people have to contend with. You can’t get the expenses down to zero unless you give up car ownership, but with these tips, you’ll be in a stronger position to handle the many costs.

Prioritise Maintenance 

You might have the day-to-day costs of owning a vehicle under control, but what if something goes wrong? There’s been a 40% rise in the cost of car repairs since 2018, so if you have an incident that requires expert help, then you could find that it has a significant impact on your bank balance. While you can’t always prevent car-related issues, you can minimise the risk by investing in your car’s maintenance. It’s much cheaper to prevent a problem rather than fix one, so be sure to stay on top of your car’s servicing. 

Invest in a Reliable Vehicle

Not all cars are created equal. Some vehicles will cost you a lot more money than others. This happens in two ways — either they have poor fuel efficiency (which means more trips to the petrol station) or they’re just unreliable, and constantly need to be taken for expensive repairs. If your current vehicle matches either of those descriptions, then you can reduce your long-term car-related expenses by upgrading to a more vehicle car. Hyundai cars, for instance, are well-known for being reliable and easy to maintain, so consider paying a visit to a Hyundai dealership to see what vehicles they have available. Of course, upgrading your car will bring another advantage, too: you’ll enjoy driving more!

Petrol-Saving Driving

Some cars naturally use more petrol than others. But equally, some drivers use more fuel than others. And it all comes down to their driving style. If you’re accelerating or braking overly aggressively, then you’ll end up using much more petrol than is necessary. Learn the art of keeping your MPG down, and you’ll be doing your bank balance a big favour.

Use Public Transport

Finally, keep in mind that you don’t always need to drive all the way when you need to get somewhere. In some cases, you don’t need to drive at all. It can be much cheaper to drive a portion of the way before taking a bus or train the rest of the way — for example, if you’re driving into a busy centre. In that scenario, you’d use more petrol standing in traffic and may need to pay for expensive parking. It’s always best to check the most cost-effective way to get somewhere! 

Staycation: The Great British Seaside Holiday and the Reasons I Love It So Much

UPDATED – October 2023

Staycation

OK, where do I start? The Great British Seaside Holiday. Going on a UK Staycation. I am aware some of my readers may not know what it is. Do not fear, I will explain below. As kids, we visited many places in Britain. Mainly because of lack of money and well, traveling abroad with two kids ain’t fun. 

I’m calling it the “British” holiday because that’s mainly where we visited as kids. Since being an adult, we have visited Wales quite a lot and I will talk all about this in future blog posts. 

I wanted to discuss this subject because my younger sibling has grown up not valuing this type of holiday as much as I do. My reaction is totally different. These holidays make me really excited and I absolutely love everything about it. Based on our family experience, I suspect other people out there either love or hate it.

If after reading this article, you feel inspired to book your next UK Staycation, I have included all the links you need…

Quick note: Mummy Conquering Anxiety is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program. Some of the links contained on this page are affiliate links and if you go through them to make a purchase, I will earn a commission. I only recommend products I use myself and think would be useful for you.

great british seaside holiday
caravan at dusk

History of the Great British Seaside Staycation

Butlins is a household name in the UK. My Grandma had the same pictures of my Mum on the beach as us when we were little. The only way you could tell the difference was one set of pictures was black and white, and one was in colour.

I’ve also stayed in a few Pontins holiday parks, for party weekends. Back when I was young and full of energy.

The fascination with this type of holiday began in the 1950s and this article explains the history in more detail.

We have a Haven holiday coming up and also regularly visit Parkdean. With our little one becoming more aware of the world around her, these types of holidays will soon become the norm. I pack up the car with everything we need and the drive is generally about two hours away. Perfect when you have a toddler!

Staycation

What attracts me to these holiday parks, over a different type of holiday?

 1. Bingo

Who doesn’t love bingo?

Quite often these parks will offer linked bingo, where you can win a large prize, and it’s fun, sitting in the entertainment room with the kids zooming around.

It reminds me of a bit more upmarket Working Men’s Club. When we were young teens, everyone had their parties here and it was right across the street from us. It is now a housing estate. This Guardian article explains how some have remained and adapted to the current times.

2. The entertainment

I must say the quality of entertainment has improved over the years and I am very impressed with the activities we have been able to pre-book for our upcoming Haven holiday.

The joy of getting ready to go out and knowing there will be something to entertain the kids. Family fun for everyone involved and I just love it.

3. Cheap drinks & lovely food

Parking the car up, throwing the bags on the bed, walking to the pub. Can’t wait. We already have a table booking just after our check-in time, haha!

It’s great for us because we know the setting will be child-friendly and we don’t have to worry about disturbing other people who are also trying to have a nice meal. Our little one can make friends, play in the arcades, we can eat and drink, safe in the knowledge she is entertained and looked after. 

This is a huge bonus for families with young children!

Pre-children, we also visited as a couple and absolutely loved it. We rented a caravan for a weekend and enjoyed the bar, minus the kid’s entertainment (there is usually a separate entertainment room and the bar is a bit quieter). I did insist on playing bingo though and hubby wasn’t that impressed.

These days we book the top brand of caravan, this allows us to have more bedrooms, bathrooms and overall comfort. As we stay with the in-laws it gives everyone a bit of personal space. Having decking is also a must. Our little one can play outside, but she’s safe in an enclosed space, and it’s also nice to sit there in the morning with a coffee, or a drink at night.

4. Play area for kids

Now I have a child, it’s also beneficial to have a play area and this is usually right outside the bar, making it convenient for everyone to have a good time.

Whilst I love our local park, the play area tends to be far away from the cafe, which I totally get. However, when you’re on holiday it’s a different vibe. It’s accepted there will be children around and everyone has fun together.

It reminds me of the vibe I get in Spain, where families go out more and do things together. Children are welcome everywhere. I am not saying in the UK they aren’t, there is just still this stigma of child-friendly and non-child-friendly places to eat and drink. I totally understand. If we had a date night, I wouldn’t want a screaming child next to me.

Maybe we are all just a bit more relaxed when we’re on holiday, and it’s a great thing.

If you don’t have a holiday planned, you can check out my blog post, which includes 20 ideas for fun activities adults and children can do together…

I’ve made use of the list this year, as this is the first holiday we’ve been on over the summer.

5. Planned activities for kids

As we usually have a week of school activities to keep the little one entertained, she will need something similar when we go on holiday. 

In the past, I’ve booked a bug hunt, nature trail, and slime-making class. This is quality family time spent together and uses up some of her energy.

6. The accommodation

When planning a Great British seaside holiday, there is something that always attracts me to stay in a caravan.

Staying in a caravan isn’t the most luxurious accommodation I’ve ever stayed in, but it’s nostalgic and fun. There is just something about it I love.

These days we book the top brand of caravan. This allows us to have more bedrooms, bathrooms, and overall comfort. As we stay with the in-laws it gives everyone a bit of personal space. Having decking is also a must. Our little one can play outside, but she’s safe in an enclosed space, and it’s also nice to sit there in the morning with a coffee, or a drink at night.

I can picture myself now! Having a sneaky look on Twitter and a lovely coffee, hopefully, before anyone else gets up, breathing in the sea air. I need it after the year I’ve had.

Check out my other blog posts in the holiday section:

TIPS TO MAKE YOUR FAMILY HOLIDAY ADVENTURE UNFORGETTABLE

THE CHARM OF HANDMADE GIFTS WHILST YOU’RE ON HOLIDAY

4 TOP TIPS FOR AN EXCITING FAMILY HOLIDAY

Too busy to read on? Pin it for later…

Staycation

7. Dog friendly

Our little one loves meeting dogs in the park. 

We also want a dog to join our family, eventually. When the time is right. This year we have family members joining us with a new puppy and we were struggling to find accommodation to house us all, along with the dog. This caravan site is the perfect solution.

It’s great that some of the parks we visit are dog-friendly. Another bonus of staying in the UK for a holiday is for those who don’t want to leave pets behind.

8. Amusement arcade

When the hubby & I got together, one of our shared passions was travelling to the seaside and spending hours on the 2p machines. We did this even before having a child. It’s something we both did as kids, we’ve grown up loving caravan holidays, and we want our little one to experience the same joy.

But he draws the line at loving the bingo and entertainment as much as I do. That’s why I bring my mum along. Eyes down…

9. Near the seaside

These caravan parks are perfect to use as a base camp to explore other nearby areas. 

During our stay, we usually split our time between park activities and going out for the day to the nearest seaside. 

Other holiday parks, booking sites & hotels I want to mention

As I am usually the event planner in the family, I’ve spent many hours researching holidays and know quite a bit about when prices spike and what facilities are available in which parks.

The Great British seaside holiday, happens to be my area of expertise, simply because it’s where we visit the most as a family. When you go abroad, the work is taken care of for you, but these types of holidays need someone organised at the helm.

I frequently use Hoseasons, as their website has a large range of bookings at other caravan parks. You can also filter by holiday type, whether it be adult-only with hot tub, child-friendly, activity parks, cottages, or large houses. They also have a range of special collections you can search by. If you sign up for their email list, you also get sent regular offers.

I’m also a huge fan of Booking.com. The biggest selling point of Booking.com is free cancellation. With what’s going on in the world recently, this is a huge benefit. It gives you peace of mind if for any reason you’re unable to travel.

We have a Village hotel near us and it’s where we go if we want some child-free time to relax. What I love about their hotels is the layout. Everything you need is onsite. You just park the car up and get ready to relax and indulge.

They have a Starbucks, a pub, a restaurant, and leisure facilities including a swimming pool, gym, and classes. A spa. Room service, rooms you can upgrade to with a coffee machine and sky package.

What more could you possibly want?

Staycation

The pandemic & its impact on UK holidays

The pandemic caused a whole different take on the British holiday. All of a sudden, people couldn’t travel outside the UK and therefore had no choice but to book a holiday in this country.

This article provides some practical guidance on how to ensure you are covered when booking a holiday.

Due to the high demand for UK holidays, we struggled to find suitable accommodation for this break, at a reasonable price. We had to compromise on the location and duration of the stay, but I am looking forward to a break and that’s what matters.

Hopefully next year we can get back to our usual routine, of going abroad, with some holiday parks scattered throughout the year, so I can get my bingo fix!

Before I pack up my car & get going…

Do you have any holidays coming up? Tell me about them below or add me on social media – for updates on mine.

I can’t wait to hear from you.

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    My Top 10 Decor & Gift Picks for the Holiday Season

    I also love supporting small businesses and other creatives. Etsy allows me to shop for what I love, whilst also supporting other people. 

    Sam – Founder of Mummy Conquering Anxiety blog

    Yesterday was the first day I remembered how gloomy October can be in the UK. But it’s also my favourite time of year. Autumn, Halloween and the lead-up to Christmas have always excited me more than the summer months. 

    I have storage boxes full of Halloween and Christmas decor. But it’s old & tired. We are in need of a fall refresh. 

    Gift Picks for the Holiday Season

    Quick note: Some of the links contained on this page are affiliate links and if you go through them to make a purchase, I will earn a commission. I only recommend products I use myself and think would be useful for other people.

    Images courtesy of individual sellers on Etsy.

    With only two paydays until the main event, it’s time for us all to start thinking about our Christmas Shopping.
    And narrowing down what we want to buy our loved ones.
    Personally, I love a unique and quirky gift. I am always on the lookout for something nobody else would buy.

    Sam – Founder of Mummy Conquering Anxiety blog

    I also love supporting small businesses and other creatives. Etsy allows me to shop for what I love, whilst also supporting other people. 

    Let’s dive into my fall decor faves

    Personalised Pumpkins

    Gift Picks for the Holiday Season

    These pumpkins are so cute! I’ve wanted to get some for a few years now.

    My little one would absolutely love one with her name on it.

    What a cute family decor idea to bring the spirit of fall into your home.

    Personalised Pumpkin Family Print

    Gift Picks for the Holiday Season

    Another cute idea is to have a wall hanging you can bring our every fall season.

    A really great way to include all the family, and bring in the new season.

    Cinnamon Buns Wax Melt Snap Bars

    wax melt snap bar

    Do I really need to say anything, other than I have just purchased some?

    Smells really do have the power to transport you to another place and transition into a change of season.

    Autumn Cottage Scene Halloween

    Autumn cottage

    Another totally cute and unique home decor item,

    You can bring this out every fall and really get into the spirit of the homely vibes.

    Autumn Pumpkin Spice Crystal Candle

    candle

    Candles are definitely my favourite thing about the fall season.

    With darker nights, you can light up the room and really create an ambience.

    For any spiritual people amongst us, the crystal elements also make this the perfect gift for a loved one,

    Don’t see anything you like?

    Struggling for inspiration?

    Why not check out the Editor’s picks for some inspiration…

    With only two paydays until the main event, it’s time for us all to start thinking about our Christmas Shopping.

    And narrowing down what we want to buy our loved ones.

    Personally, I love a unique and quirky gift. I am always on the lookout for something nobody else would buy.

    Let’s dive into my gift ideas for Christmas

    Cornish Candle Gift Box

    Gift set

    The perfect, cute little gift set. For anyone who loves candles. or maybe you know someone who is in need of a self-care heart?

    Personalised Coffee Cup with Name On

    Gift Picks for the Holiday Season

    As a busy mum, who literally NEEDS coffee every morning, I would love this as a gift.

    Perfect to sit next to a coffee machine in your loved ones’ house.

    Coffee Syrup Drink Stirrers

    Gift Picks for the Holiday Season

    Are there any coffee lovers out there?

    Do you happen to know someone who absolutely loves creating coffee-shop-style coffees at home?

    We all know how expensive it can be to visit Starbucks every day.

    Christmas Coffee Sweatshirt

    Gift Picks for the Holiday Season

    This has got me excited about my Christmas Eve Box. I love making one for my little girl, but I want one for myself now.

    Maybe you have family coming to stay with you? This would make the perfect gift to wear on Christmas Day or for your Boxing Day celebrations.

    You’ll Always Be My Best-Tea

    Gift Picks for the Holiday Season

    The perfect gift for your best-tea to remember you by.

    Maybe you have a friend you can’t be with over the festive period.

    Or someone who needs a little reminder that you love them.

    Final thoughts

    I hope you enjoyed my rundown of fall decor for your home. And a list of great gifts so you can start thinking about your Christmas list.

    Which item is your favourite?

    Gift Picks for the Holiday Season

    Affirmations – What Comes to Mind?

    GUEST POST – a note from the writer…

    Hello, My name is Princess Joe-Igbuzor. I’m a Nigerian Law student who is passionate about mental health and women’s rights. 

    I am indeed thrilled to be writing this guest post for your blog, I hope you enjoy the read and have a great day. 

    About My Blog 

    Write_rspace is a mental health blog which focuses on saying big things in small ways. Predominantly writing about mental health, my focus is to de-stigmatize the mystic aura behind mental health and reduce it into concepts that people can understand in everyday life. 

    Different things spring to mind depending on how deep you are in your personal development journey. For some, Affirmations are like a list of mantras that you recite to yourself every morning. Others see it as some form of ritual in which you chant a string of words. 

    Putting it plain and simple, Affirmations in this context are sentences you say to yourself to profess the opposite of your surrounding situation.

    It’s speaking positively even in the negative. 

    No one who is truly happy stands in front of a mirror and tells themselves they’re happy.

    Mark Manson in his book, The Subtle Art of Not Giving A F**k
    Affirmations

    Quick note: Some of the links contained on this page are affiliate links and if you go through them to make a purchase, I will earn a commission. I only recommend products I use myself and think would be useful for other people.

    Lets dive in

    Over time, a lot of individuals including myself have begun to see Affirmations as a form of ritualistic activity. It almost seems like affirmations are delusions we tell ourselves because as said by Mark Manson in his book, The Subtle Art of Not Giving A F**k, ‘No one who is truly happy stands in front of a mirror and tells themselves they’re happy.’ 

    Ever since I had jumped off the bandwagon and stopped using affirmations in total or so I thought. I, like most people, thought affirmations were sentences you told yourself in front of a mirror every morning and that was all there was to it. 

    So then I would ask myself and I’m sure you’ve asked yourself this too, 

    ‘Why should I say I’m happy every morning even when I don’t feel happy?’ 

    Like I said earlier, it makes one feel delusional especially when those words don’t instantly make things perfect and we still go about our day feeling down. 

    But what we have failed to realize is that Affirmations are never one size fits all. It’s not some ritual or only an activity that some people partake in. We all use affirmations day in and day out.

    Let me show you 7 ways you unconsciously use affirmations

    7 ways you unconsciously use affirmations

    An ‘I’ll be fine’ on a bad/rough day.

    Remember the last time you were having a really bad day, your self-esteem felt like it was non-existence and you just wanted to disappear literally. 

    When you find yourself in this situation and after having a meltdown session, you clean your tears and you say, ‘I’ll be fine.’ or ‘I will get through this’.

    Do you want to know a secret? That ‘I’ll be fine’ or ‘I will get through this’ or their variations are affirmations. 

    But we say it so often that we don’t realize they are affirmations. 

    How? 

    Because everything in that moment is telling you that things won’t be fine and yet you profess the positive even in that state. 

    I recall, last month I was going through a really bad few weeks and I had been trying to keep it all inside but this particular day every emotion I was feeling felt heightened and I wanted to drop everything and just go home but I couldn’t. In the midst of all that, I remember saying, ‘I will be fine, I have gone through so much and this will not overcome me.’ 

    I didn’t instantly feel better but I was calmer in that moment so it was easier to face the task at hand. I know I was aware at that moment that I had used an affirmation. 

    The ‘I look good’ on a bad hair/outfit day. 

    We have all had our fair share of bad hair/outfit days, it’s a common occurrence in life. 

    But telling yourself you look good in an outfit that you know you don’t or you could better is a form of affirmation. You just don’t pay close attention to it. The outfit doesn’t make the person, The person makes the outfit. 

    So even when you are putting on an outfit that you know you look mid in, you square your shoulders and readjust your posture and tell yourself, ‘I look good.’ 

    On days when you have a sudden wardrobe malfunction and there is no alternative so you make a spare outfit, you still tell yourself you look great despite knowing you could look better. 

    Some books to help you on your affirmation journey

    The ‘I can do anything I set my mind to’ when goal setting. 

    Whether you write it down or have a vision in your head, we all have goals. 

    Some parameters of what we hope to achieve. However, some days come and we are down in the dumps wondering if we will ever achieve the goals we had in mind. An experience I’m sure we all relate to is that of setting resolutions. 

    At the beginning of the month or year, we set resolutions of the things we hope to achieve before the specific timeline runs out. But almost always by the middle of the month or a few months into the year, we lose our momentum, that drive that we had the day we were setting the goal is almost non-existence. 

    Setbacks with goal-setting

    Or perhaps we have been trying to achieve the goals but we have encountered some setbacks. 

    Naturally, we begin to reevaluate our goals and attempt to make some changes but then suddenly we get this deep resilience that we can do anything we set our minds to. 

    Sometimes we say this out loud. Oftentimes we just feel it and rather than change course, we tread down the same path with renewed energy and motivation. 

    The ‘I’m great’ when doubt sets in. 

    For every athlete and artist out there, you can resonate with a moment in your career when you were doubtful of your capabilities even when you have proved yourself before. 

    The mind is a tricky place and although you know you can achieve this feat, doubt and fear have come to nestle you just right before the race, game or performance. 

    You tell yourself to just breathe and calm down but your palms become shaky and sweaty. You certainly can’t perform at your best like this so you try to give yourself a confidence boost but that doesn’t seem to help. 

    And then you start to take deep breaths and tell yourself ‘I’ll do great.’, ‘I’m great, I have done this before, I can do it again.’ 

    I’m a university student and last semester was tough. I had done well in previous semesters but this last semester, doubt started to sink in. I would read for hours and not remember a single thing, I knew I was in over my head and I needed to get out of there fast or my grades would fall. 

    So every time, right before I started reading or writing any form of test or exam, I would tell myself that ‘I’m great and I can do this. I have done it before and this time will be no different.’ I didn’t know it but It was affirmations that helped me get through that doubt. 

    Tools to help you on your self-development journey

    The ‘It’s not that bad’ when things are really bad. 

    Affirmations don’t always have to be in the form of all positive and go skippy, they can sometimes hide in semi-positive statements especially when we subconsciously don’t want to admit that we use affirmations. 

    You have been in a situation that was very bad like stage 10 bad and yet you told yourself that, ‘it’s not that bad.’ 

    Like a hall, you rented for an event getting flooded before the event or you got a bad score on a test you worked hard for. 

    In the midst of all this, you tell yourself, ‘It’s not that bad.’ and you move on. It doesn’t make things better but it begins to hurt less. 

    The ‘Tomorrow will be better’ after a long day. 

    Some days are never-ending, they seem to have 36 hours instead of the usual 24 hours. The night can’t come any faster so when you do eventually get to crawl into bed. You are already exhausted and just want to be over with the day so you tell yourself, Tomorrow will be better. Because it has to be. 

    That’s affirmation at its best. You are speaking into a new day and declaring what you want from it even before the day is here. 

    Some days you don’t even realize that you are saying this or speaking it into existence. It just seems natural and far from mystical. 

    Lastly, we have the ‘It’s a phase, It will pass’ after a series of bad weeks/months.

    This we use when we have yet another bad week after a string of bad weeks or another bad month after a few bad months. 

    We tell ourselves that we know things may be not great now but no situation is permanent and it will all pass soon despite no inclination that things are getting better. 

    We tell ourselves it’s a phase and we believe so. That’s the power of affirmations

    One of the instant benefits of these unconscious affirmations is the sense of calmness and assurance that you feel after speaking these positive words into existence. 

    Closing Remarks 

    Affirmations don’t have to be in front of a mirror or said at a particular time of the day. That’s the hidden magic to it.

    You can make use of affirmations daily without even realizing that you are. In the same way, we have positive affirmations, there exist negative affirmations. 

    But now that you know the benefits of positive affirmations, you can imagine what effects negative affirmations will have. 

    In what ways have you used affirmations unconsciously in your daily life?

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