It is a proven fact, that the early years of our lives shape who we are and how well we cope with challenges in adult life. A traumatic experience in childhood can have lasting effects. Exploring emotions is vital.
All human beings have emotions. They start to develop at an early age, often when toddlers don’t really understand what they are yet. The common one in our house at the moment is missing other people. This involves a daily conversation filled with reassurance, that everyone misses the people they love.
Because toddler emotions are a challenge I currently face. And I know other parents definitely go through this cycle, I wanted to write a post dedicated to the best stories I could find, discussing children’s emotions.
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Let’s look at the research into why we should explore emotions
Why emotions are important
Understanding children’s emotions are critical to understanding their behaviour. Early years children feel a range of emotions, but often cannot express, interpret or process them like us.
With poor emotional skills, it could be harder for children to learn:
- acceptance
- resilience
- confidence and control
- how to articulate experiences
- a sense of identity
- empathy
- a sense of self
What Is Social and Emotional Development
Children grow and develop rapidly in their first five years across the four main areas of development. These areas are motor (physical), communication and language, cognitive, social and emotional.
Social and emotional development means how children start to understand who they are, what they are feeling and what to expect when interacting with others. It is the development of being able to:
- Form and sustain positive relationships.
- Experience, manage and express emotions.
- Explore and engage with the environment.
Positive social and emotional development is important. This development influences a child’s self-confidence, empathy, the ability to develop meaningful and lasting friendships and partnerships, and a sense of importance and value to those around them. Children’s social and emotional development also influences all other areas of development.
Parents and caregivers play the biggest role in social/emotional development because they offer the most consistent relationships for their children. Consistent experiences with family members, teachers and other adults help children learn about relationships and explore emotions in predictable interactions.
To nurture your child’s social and emotional development, it is important that you engage in quality interactions like these on a daily basis, depending on the age of your child:
- Be affectionate and nurturing: hold, comfort, talk and sing with your baby, toddler and child.
- Help your baby experience joy in “give-and-take” relationships by playing games like “peek-a-boo.”
- Provide your toddler with responsive care, letting them practice new skills while still providing hands-on help.
- Support your child’s developing skills; help him/her, but don’t do everything for your child, even if it takes longer or is messy.
- Teach social and emotional skills, such as taking turns, listening and resolving conflict.
What happens if we don’t manage emotions
One of the most important ways parents or guardians can help is by listening to their children and taking their feelings seriously. They may want a hug, they may want you to help them change something or they may want practical help.
Children and young people’s negative feelings usually pass. However, it’s a good idea to get help if your child is distressed for a long time if their feelings are stopping them from getting on with their lives, if their distress is disrupting family life or if they are repeatedly behaving in ways you wouldn’t expect at their age.
Mentalhealth.org.uk
Let’s dive into the list of stories that explore emotions with toddlers and children
What’s Troubling Tawny?
What’s Troubling Tawny? The award-winning second book in the Sumatran Trilogy! Tawny longs to make friends with another rhino, but her shyness holds her back. When she meets a hornbill called Tallulah, she is surprised to learn that she has a lot in common with the beautiful bird.
The Problem With Poppy
Poppy the porcupine has always wanted to make a friend, but her defensive nature prevents her. When a young tiger cub stumbles upon her one day in the rainforest, she reacts badly and scares him away.
Determined to change her ways, she sets out to find him, but little does she know that the tiger cub is about to have a problem of his own. In the face of danger, will Poppy find a way to save the day?
The Problem with Poppy is the award-winning debut picture book by British author Emma Sandford. Illustrated by Ukrainian artist Olena Osadcha.
Sarah’s Shadow
If you could change something about yourself, would you do it?
When Sarah Simpkins is teased about her shadow in the school playground, she finds herself wishing she didn’t have one.
That night she has the chance to make the wish come true. But will losing her shadow really make her happy?
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Let’s Be Friends Again
Purchase the book below:
Let’s Be Friends AgainKids World Books – Sibling fights, tantrums and subsequent bonding is the theme of this story.
The story is narrated by a boy and he narrates rather than shares his experiences with his sister. The boy and the girl play together. They spend most of their leisure time together. Just like every sibling, they fight often and bond subsequently.
The boy finds some trouble with his sister. The boy sometimes babysits for his sister and she used to trouble him! However, she was a good listener and the boy used to tell some great stories. The boy refused to share his toys with her. Yet, the smart girl used to grab all her brother’s toys. The tantrum began when the girl played with his brother’s pet turtle!
The girl thought that the tank where the pet turtle was kept was too small for the turtle. She carried it to the pond and let it free in the pond.
The boy was as angry as he lost his pet turtle. He showed his anger in many ways. He shouted at her. He threw away his toys and kept on thinking about his turtle. His parents supported his sister. He planned to avenge the loss of his pet and imagined many things. (This is definitely a fun part that everyone would die laughing).
He couldn’t sleep for hours thinking about the pet. He then saw his sister playing in the garden so happy like never before. The boy was surprised as well as very angry seeing her sister happy.
He made a decision! What was that?
Let’s be friends again, the lovable brother and sister, their cute fights, rivalry, etc are narrated beautifully. It happens very commonly in every household.
Children and young people are still developing – they don’t have adult brains or bodies, so need help to understand and manage their emotions.
You’ve probably heard your parents or grandparents say “they’re just attention seeking” or “they’re being difficult”. But there’s usually more to it than this.
We often ask people who contact Children 1st Parentline: “What is your child trying to tell you when they’re acting like that?” Looked at this way, unwanted behaviour is usually about a child needing something – or their way of trying to work out how to manage something.
From a toddler’s need for comfort to a teenager’s conflicting desires for independence and security, testing behaviour is common and is often set off by everyday experiences rather than big events.
Children1st.org.uk
When Worley gets Brave
READ ABOUT THE AUTHOR:
Jodi also thinks the book will come just at the right time for children who have had to shut themselves away all year and might be scared to try something new.
She added: “It is a lovely story for 4–7-year-olds about taking yourself out of your comfort zone to try new things.
“Worley’s story is a fab way to engage children with these cute little monsters and learn how to develop their confidence.
“The book also included suggested activities for parent and adult readers.
“I’m also now writing my second story for the series about Worley and Co!
When Worley gets Angry
How to teach children how to deal with anger, through the character of Worley and his friends.
READ ABOUT THE AUTHOR:
She has produced books – which tell the story of very special monsters who face different emotions – in her efforts to help children talk about their feelings.
“Having suffered quite a bit as a kid – I lost my dad at 10 and my best friend at 14 – and had a lot of bullying and not nice things going on and I didn’t know how to cope,” she explained.
“That had a massive effect on me as an adult which led to a breakdown. I don’t want kids to go through what I did. The more people I can teach and I can help the better. I don’t think I would have had as big a meltdown if I already had tools to use.
“My characters are all monsters – I have a whole tribe of emotions monsters that teach children about emotions. Worley is the main one and he meets his friends with different emotions.
“The first one was teaching him to be brave and through the monster, you learn you might make a mistake but it will be fine. He realises he doesn’t need to be the best at everything.
“The second book is about anger. The book is written as a rhyme; basically, Worley gets angry and doesn’t know what it is. His friend George, the angry monster, teaches him it is ok to be angry and how to manage it.
“It is done in quite a fun way so children can understand.”
Buster Finds His Beat
Purchase the book below:
Buster Finds His BeatA feel-good story about an autistic boy,
That will capture your imagination and fill you with joy.
Buster uses ear defenders to soften sounds he hears,
Find out what happens when he faces his fears…
Pick up your copy, you’ll be in for a treat,
As he uses the power of sound to find his own beat.
Hector
The first book in a new rhyming picture book series from D.M. Mullan and Kirsteen Harris Jones – welcome to D.M. Mullan’s Curious Tales… Hector van Groat If something is missing, and you’re feeling blue, you could learn from Hector, who feels this way too. This little genius lives in an upside-down boat, and he grunts from his hill like a grumpy old goat. “Hector van Groat needs no one but Hector because he is a genius, a crazy inventor”.
Where Is My Smile?
A beautifully illustrated picture book about mental health for young readers. Where Is My Smile? is the story of a little boy who can’t find his smile anywhere. He searches and searches, but it’s nowhere to be found. Where could his smile be? This delightful picture book is perfect as a bedtime story, and to help little children understand that it’s okay to be sad sometimes, but we can always find our way through it.
Final Thoughts
I hope you enjoyed reading my list of books to inspire conversations with your toddler about emotions.
Do you have any of these books? Or will you be purchasing them? What techniques do you use to explore emotions?
I would love to hear from you in the comments below.
