During my anxiety years and especially during down periods, I told myself I couldn’t go out do things and it was the worse thing I did to myself. A travesty. I cut myself off from happy times, spending time with people I love, enjoying the little things in life, all because I subscribed to black & white thinking and had a script full of self-limiting beliefs constantly running over and over again in my head. And I let it happen…
It’s time to carve out a new healthy path and ditch the old way of thinking. It previously damaged my mental health and I must avoid this ever happening to me again in the future. You can read more about when my mental health struggles began here.
Want to know the secret to living a happy and fulfilled life? Read on…
It was also nice to shop without the little one running around. There is a perception parents shouldn’t leave children out and I feel guilty when I do! But it is so important, we as parents, take time for ourselves. I breathed a sigh of relief in the first charity shop because I had images running through my brain of the little one grabbing every item off the shelves and me telling her off. It was reassuring to know I didn’t have to contend with this today, she was at nursery being entertained instead.
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Today, my mum suggested a trip to the charity shops and some breakfast. A simple activity I would usually be inclined to say no to due to lack of money. She kindly treated me to a coffee, sandwich and gave me some spending money, because she knows money is tight for us at the moment. I’ve told her I visit the supermarket and walk around adding up what I’ve spent. My parents know what this feels like to count the pennies and we are so lucky to have them helping us out. Shout out mum & dad if you ever happen to read this!
Our trip and why outings work wonders for your mental health
Because we are still on holiday as a family, I had the family car today, which made the trip easier. I usually travel around by public transport or walk, which I don’t mind. It does me good. We ditched the second car years ago because it wasn’t cost-effective. Today, having a car, was a luxury I am not used to.
Wandering around, without a care in the world, not knowing what time it is, and browsing the shelves, was therapeutic.
It was also nice to shop without the little one running around. There is a perception parents shouldn’t leave children out and I feel guilty when I do! But it is so important, we as parents, take time for ourselves. I breathed a sigh of relief in the first charity shop because I had images running through my brain of the little one grabbing every item off the shelves and me telling her off. It was reassuring to know I didn’t have to contend with this today, she was at nursery being entertained instead.
We had a chat about loads of topics I can’t even recall now, catching up about life and you know what, this time is much more valuable than worrying about money issues. Yes, we all need money to live and you can achieve wellness by managing your money correctly (I don’t want anyone to have the worries I’ve experienced over the last year due to financially overcommitting), but you also have to live life and ensure you get out of the house to do activities that fit within your budget.
There are plenty of free and cheap things you can do and I am passionate about sharing my tips with others. You can read more about how you can have fun on a budget in my blog post here.
My mental breakdown this year has shown me you have to set aside time to spend with family, spend a little money, and enjoy your life. If you take the time to do this, all the other parts will fit into place and surely you will be in a better place to tackle difficult issues you may be going through.
My charity shop haul
Living a happy and fulfilled life means doing something you love! And I love shopping.
As I am so excited and refreshed following my outing this morning, of course, I had to write a blog post about it. I’ve even become one of those bloggers taking pictures of everything (well roping the hubby in with his great phone camera, IT skills, and photoshop knowledge). I am no expert (I will leave the flatlays to a professional website, like Canva), but here is the picture of my haul:
The items I bought and why I loved them
Of course, I had to get the little one some toys and activities to entertain her. We are the stage where we need constant entertainment to reflect the experience she gets at nursery. It’s so much fun, but also hard work.
She loves Peppa Pig and now has a Peppa Pig torch which was £1.25. I know she will be overjoyed when she comes home from nursery today and sees this toy, and the look on her face is well worth £1.25.
I also got her an activity book for 50p. She isn’t yet at the stage where she can work through the activities, but she loves colouring books and drawing all over the pages. She will get endless enjoyment for 50p. Winner!
The Meccano set is parts only and I didn’t realise this in the shop, but for £1.99 I am not going to moan about it and she can do some building. It’s also an excuse for us to add other Meccano parts to her Christmas list.
I got some home decorations to spruce the place up a bit, ahead of my larger autumn purchases (a future blog post will cover the topic of what I purchased!). We needed a fresh bowl of Pot Pourri and it was just sat on the shelf as if it had been waiting for me, because I’ve been talking about it loads this week! £2.00 – bargain!
The little gold pot will be an addition to our rose gold decor (I previously bought the other items from Poundland). It was 40p.
We all need body lotion in our lives and I love seeking it out in charity shops. There are so many unwanted gift sets given away. You get a cheap item, whilst also raising money for charity. Win, win. 50p for this lotion. I can’t wait to try it.
On winter days, I love wearing these headbands. They keep the hair off your face and also cover your ears. I haven’t got a light coloured one, so had to purchase this. £1.99. Can’t go wrong with something so useful.
Books – these were 50p each and I will be adding them to the stack of books I intend to read. I might even do a before and after blog post, to encourage me to read them all. Lack of reading isn’t because I don’t love doing it, it’s getting the time with a toddler who believes every physical item in the house is hers.
Why I’m now happy and fulfilled
I’ve spent years shying away from some activities out of fear, lack of money, or lack of time.
My mental breakdown this year has shown me you have to set aside time to spend with family, spend a little money, and enjoy your life. If you take the time to do this, all the other parts will fit into place and surely you will be in a better place to tackle difficult issues you may be going through. You can read more about how I recovered from my breakdown here.
It would have been easy to say no to going out today, due to money worries, but it’s exactly because of the money worries why I needed to get out of the house, get some fresh air, spend some time not caring about a thing, and having quality mummy daughter time.
The point is, don’t live such a busy life you need to pay money to feel somewhat normal. How about living a more mediocre life and having quality time to spend with family and friends? What’s the point in earning so much money anyway, if you’re always too tired to spend it?
Simplify life
In the past, my mum & I might have visited Village Hotels for a spa day. Whilst we will return at some point, I am now looking for cheaper alternatives to get out of the house and still have fun.
Having fun and finding fulfilling activities is simple, we as human beings tend to overcomplicate it. These are some of the things I used to say to myself when working 12 hour days:
- To feel better I need a spa day
- I am so stressed from working 12 hour days, I need to treat myself
- Work hard, play hard
- I deserve it
- I am too tried to spend the money I earn
I previously equated living a happy and fulfilled with spending money. This doesn’t always bring you happiness. I would much rather do something free with my loved ones, like sitting in the park.
Don’t get me wrong, if you want to do the above activities and have luxuries in your life, go for it. I will resume cheap spa days when I can afford it again!
The point is, don’t live such a busy life you need to pay money to feel somewhat normal. How about living a more mediocre life and having quality time to spend with family and friends? What’s the point in earning so much money anyway, if you’re always too tired to spend it?
To read more posts on mental health, see the other blogs I’ve written below…
7 crucial steps I took to gradually recover from my breakdown
Recovery from my breakdown was not an easy task. Previously I viewed self-care as selfish. I would be doing something…
Breathe Bracelets – 10 breaths bracelet
#GIFTED POST – When the lovely lady from Breathe Bracelets messaged me about her shop, I was excited about the…
Why I’m revealing my honest feelings about a setback in my recovery from a breakdown
The reason I am sharing this post with you today Following a setback in my recovery, I wanted to share…
8 questions I’m asking myself in preparation for gratitude day
World gratitude day is fast approaching – Tuesday 21 September 2021! In preparation for gratitude day, I’m thinking about all…
Final thoughts
What steps are you taking to live a happy and fulfilled life?
In the future, I want to create a life where quality time with family is balanced with working enough to pay bills and live comfortably. It is clear to me now, the type of job I was doing in the past and the long hours I worked, damaged my mental health. It’s time to prioritise happiness and the big secret is actually that it’s very easy to do, with a mindset change.
Here’s to a happier and more fulfilled life for us all.
What are you doing to balance family time with work-life? Do you think your views have changed since the pandemic?
I would love to hear from you in the comments below.
This was a great read and so so actual to this time! I think that we are brought to think that working more and more will give us more satisfaction, money and a better future which on one side is true, but the other side of the coin is always to find a balance. As you said there’s no reason to work so much if you don’t get to enjoy it! Love the charity haul x
Glad you enjoyed reading. I totally agree on the work side of things. It’s easy to chase money and become stressed, but I am now at the point where a work-life balance is needed. Even though it will be difficult, it must be done.
Getting out of bed and doing something different can really help with anxiety. Anytime I am feel down I usually try to go out and do something it helps me so much. I love charity shops.
I agree with doing something different. I’ve tried to do this every day since my breakdown.
Getting out there also really helps.
I want to do another charity shop haul now.
Excellent post, great advice and activities. It is simple once you know how, it’s all about making the conscious decision to want the change and going for it 😊
I am glad you found the post helpful.
I agree, it’s all about being conscious of what you are doing.
This is a great post! I like that you start off with an activity that you normally say no to and yet because you end up being open-minded and trying it, you find it really replenishes your mood. I want to be more of a yes person when it comes to opportunities with those I’m close to. We underestimate how valuable these experiences are. It also sounds like you came out on top with your purchases. Good finds!
I love taking these little walks by myself everyday, in my own city, just wandering, discovering new parks, cafe’s and meeting cute puppies. It’s good for physical as well as mental health. Love the post 🙌
This all sounds amazing. We go to the local park and do the same. Our little one loves meeting dogs in the park, haha!
Glad you like the post!
Thank you. I totally agree. The old me, even at the start of this year, would have probably said no to the day out or felt like my little one must be with us.
It’s refreshing to have a different viewpoint now and not feel bad about doing things that benefit me.
What an amazing charity shop & haul! Looks like you got some great purchases. Thank you so much for sharing Xo
Elle – ellegracedeveson.com
I loved all the purchases I got. It makes me want to do another one!
I must admit, I’m not a charity shop lover, but I think I’ll give them a go when we come out of lockdown. I do love bargains, so who knows what I might find! Like you, I’m a full-time mum and part-time travel blogger, and a few months ago, my mental health was suffering, so I halved the blog posts that I put out per week, and now just focus on one post per week, which is much more manageable. Your mental health is everything, and we need to focus on looking after it more 🙂 Thanks for sharing.
Finding bargains is the exciting part.
I totally agree with you on the mental health aspect. It’s central to everything and we must put it at the top of the priority list.
True, getting out and about does relieve anxiety, when you are anxious and depressed you just want to stay in bed all day. But if you get out you feel so much better. I’ve had a mental breakdown when I was a stay at home Mom, maybe because I wasn’t getting out enough, but I honestly don’t know.
Getting out and spending time with loved ones, is so soothing to the soul.
Great post.
Thank you. I’m sorry to hear about your experience, it’s horrible when your mind essentially breaks. But we are here, seeing the positive aspects in life and that’s the main thing x
You picked up some great items from the charity shop. We only get one shot at life so its important to find the right balance that allows you to do things you enjoy.
Thank you. I loved all the items. It’s all about finding a balance for me now and focusing on the important aspects of life.
Great post! This really is food for thought, and I appreciate the way this post made me think. Thanks for sharing x
Thank you. I am glad it gave you food for thought.
What a great Charity shop haul! I’m glad you had such a great time doing so!
Thank you. I loved it. I want to go again now!
Going charity shop shopping is one of my favourite forms of self-care! You picked out some great things 🙂 x
Glad you like the post. Simple things are the best!
Great job with finding some bargains in your charity shop haul! After working for 33 years with no prospect of obtaining a part time job to find the work/life balance I needed, I decided to retire a year early. Looking back, it was the smartest thing I ever did. Thanks for sharing.
Thank you.
I am so glad you decided to do this. We have to be able to live life a little 🙂
Definitely pandemic made us all re-evaluate our choices in life. I have been there also. Working long hours to earn money that you don’t have neither the time nor the power to spend them. We don’t need lots of money to have a good time and feel happy. What we need is enough money to get by and our loved ones near. I love charity shops. I like buying small gifts out of there. Thank you for this post!
I totally agree with this. Enough money to live and enjoy ourselves. This is my goal moving forward.
This is a great post and can relate to an extent. Growing up in the Caribbean I was at my most happiest. Hanging with friends and family everyday and always surrounded by nature is a great stress and anxiety buster.
This sounds amazing. If I could do this every day I think I would feel better. I am determined to find a good work-life balance for the future though 🙂
Absolutely loved the post. It is so relatable. I also feel guilty if I have to leave my toddler and go out. Kudos to you for bringing out what these simple joys in life can do to you and to balance your life.
Glad you could relate to this. It’s a horrible feeling, but we all need alone time.
I am striving for a balance and am determined to find one.
Charity shops are always treasure troves. Great post! I like how you suggest dealing with living on a budget.
It’s amazing what you can find. We’ve got some of our favourite home decorations for so cheap. I love seeking out bargains.
Wonderful post, I can relate to a lot of it. I enjoy the seemingly small, simple things in life. Thanks for sharing
Thank you for your comment. I am glad you could relate – simple things are the best 🙂
You made it sound easy to find affordable and fun places and hotels. I always keep struggling haha.
It’s only easy because I’ve spent endless hours in the past researching places, haha! At least I am sharing my knowledge now 🙂
The smaller things in life tend to be more enjoyable to me. School has been hectic since the pandemic but I try to spend as much time with family and check up on my friends. Great post! xx
It’s difficult to find time when you’re busy, but we must. Good luck with school x
What a great post, and I love what you found at the charity shop. I’m on a limited budget, too, but I’m also trying to be sustainable, which means buying less anyway, making me happier. Things don’t equate to happiness; moments of contentment do.
I totally agree with this. I would take contentment over material objects any day 🙂
Yesssssssssss!!!!!! Small things in life are the no.1 key to happiness. You must appreciate and be grateful of your surroundings. Thank you for sharing your positive energy with me.
Thanks for your comment. Let’s spread the positive energy 🙂
A change of perspective and mindset does help. Thank you for this reminder. And yes, it’s so important to set aside time to do something you love. This is a form of taking care of yourself as well. 🙂
Changing my perspective has done wonders for me, it really works! It’s so important to take time out x
I feel like this describes me as I’ve shut myself off and not gone out much at all during the past two years (obviously Covid-19 played into that too). I’ve started doing little trips out, just doing some normal, everyday things and it is amazing how it has changed my outlook. Thanks for sharing your experiences and for being so encouraging — this helps!
I am glad this helps and well done for getting out. I felt exactly the same following the pandemic.
Wow you did fantastic with your charity shop haul – what a great bunch of items! I’m so glad you took some time to recharge and take care of yourself!
I love a good charity shop haul & I thought, why not share it!
I have to prioritise time to recharge & this trip out worked wonders for me.