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Anxiety is a form of stress. However, they are not the same. It is not uncommon for people who experience an extremely stressful situation to believe they have seen and survived anxiety. Dealing with high stress deserves all the respect in the world. But the main difference between anxiety and stress is that stress tends to have a tangible trigger, such as an urgent work project, for example.
Anxiety, on the other hand, has long forgotten its trigger. Someone who has gone through a disturbing experience that was stressful at the time could develop an anxiety disorder as a response, which means they could get anxious reminiscing about their previous experience, facing a new situation that shares common points with their experience, or even imagining what would happen if they were to go through the same thing again. Anxiety is the world where what-if questions live. Unfortunately, what ifs have no trigger. So, the typical advice to avoid triggers may not be useful at all.
How do you manage the what-if scenarios in day-to-day life?
Learn to know your mind
Controlling your mind is an impossible challenge. However, getting to know what makes you feel vulnerable and which mindset can influence your what-ifs could be a game-changer. That is precisely where keeping a journal can make a huge difference to your anxiety. Indeed, a journal allows you to play out some of the possible scenarios safely while reminding yourself of the positive things in your life. Listing the good and happy things in your life can help significantly. It is easy to lose yourself in the distress of a what-if narrative. But the positive aspects of your life can act as sanity lights that take you back to safety.
Besides, a journal can also let you track mood swings and habits, so you can identify times when you are more susceptible to anxiety.
Talk about it
What makes anxiety especially difficult to manage is social and emotional isolation. Anxiety can cut you off from your friend and family circle as you find it hard to express your thoughts and be heard. As such, what ifs drive loneliness? Being alone with your thoughts is never easy, especially when your thoughts get the best of you. Unfortunately, very few friends are mentally and emotionally astute about the stages of anxiety. But talking with someone who understands what you are going through and isn’t going to judge you for it can transform your experience. Expert psychologists at Three Seas have developed dedicated programmes to provide counselling and telehealth to their clients. Finding a therapist you can trust to manage and control what-if scenarios will offer the support you need to:
Free yourself from the spiralling anxiety trap
Learn to recognise dangerous thinking habits
Unlock your courage by voicing out your fears
Discuss potential techniques and coping mechanisms that could help in the future
Talk medication if needs be — why suffer alone when there are solutions out there?
What ifs are the enemy of an anxious mind. But, every enemy, ever the most fearsome ones, has weaknesses. What ifs lose their power when you can recognise them for what they are, name them, understand which habits grant them power, and ultimately remind yourself that they don’t control you. Is it easy? No, it never is. But, hopefully, these tips can help you feel less vulnerable to their soul-crushing darkness.
It’s been four years since I had a mental breakdown and I’m now glad I can spot the signs of stressful period when things become too much. And, more importantly, actually do something about it before it spirals out of control too much. I never want to return to the position I was in when I had a mental breakdown. As such, it is now about damage control.
It’s no secret that I took a break from social media recently. But running this blog in my spare time is just one small part of my life. As with all working parents, we have a lot of other stress factors to deal with. And sometimes something tips the balance and it just becomes too much for us to handle.
When this happens, I face constant anxiety for a week or two. Get very run down, and become mentally and physically unwell. This then leads to depression and feelings of inadequacy.
It’s been four years since I had a mental breakdown and I’m now glad I can spot the signs of the stressful period when things become too much. And, more importantly, actually do something about it before it spirals out of control too much. I never want to return to the position I was in when I had a mental breakdown. As such, it is now about damage control.
The stress bucket
We all have a stress bucket and sometimes it can overflow. We live in a world which induces anxiety in the calmest of people. Therefore we have to be careful and look after our well-being. Hypnotherapy was one of the main therapies which helped me and I use it when my mental health takes a hit.
The mind needs maintenance – just like you would physically rest after a long walk or injury to your body. I also want to make it clear to everyone reading this post that dips in our mental well-being will occur. Life throws curveballs our way and sometimes, even just one factor of our lives, can cause all the other plates spinning to topple over. And it’s okay to feel that way. It’s okay, to be honest about how you’re feeling. And take the time you need to feel mentally well again.
Taking control of the situation can be difficult
When I am in the midst of anxiety, even the decision to do something about the way I am feeling whirls around in my mind constantly. Will people think I’m inadequate? Will they question me about the way I am feeling? Should I just sort myself out?
Some of this critical thinking comes from me being quite harsh on myself. Some of it is from traumatic past experiences.
Stress factors which can impact anyone
Stress in daily life
Childcare challenges
Money problems
Not allocating time for myself
Being too busy to relax
Communication problems in home life
Symptoms Of Anxiety taking over
Critical thinking
Thinking the past will repeat itself
Frantic thinking
Losing control of emotions
Lacking in motivation
Not wanting to put makeup on
Detached
Worn out emotionally
In desperate need of self-care
Remedies for becoming mentally well again
I know firsthand just how much strength it takes to motivate yourself when you feel unwell mentally. However, because I have a toddler, normal everyday life has to resume. I thrive on a routine and using my brain. As such, I don’t do well when I have to stop and rest.
My mental wellbeing routine also forms a structure and it takes me time to feel like myself again.
Honesty
I dealt with things differently this time. One of the main differences when things started to feel out of control, was my honesty with everyone around me. Once it was clear to me that things were getting worse and I couldn’t control it. It was time, to be fully honest. With myself, initially. But also everyone around me. Given my mental health history, my family are in tune with when I am not quite feeling myself.
I am proud of myself for finally being honest with everyone around me. Feeling comfortable talking about how I really feel, made the world of difference.
A lot of people struggle to open up about their mental health difficulties, for fear of being judged. Now I’ve created the work-life balance I need and I have supportive people around me, it was easier to open up.
Final thoughts
The mind needs maintenance – just like you would physically rest after a long walk or injury to your body. I also want to make it clear to everyone reading this post that dips in our mental well-being will occur. Life throws curveballs our way and sometimes, even just one factor of our lives, can cause all the other plates spinning to topple over. And it’s okay to feel that way. It’s okay, to be honest about how you’re feeling. And take the time you need to feel mentally well again.
Stress is a common experience for many people, and it can profoundly impact mental and physical health. In this blog post, we will explore the various ways to cope with stress better and develop strategies to manage its effects. We’ll discuss how to recognize stress triggers, identify healthy coping strategies, and incorporate techniques such as relaxation techniques and mindfulness into your daily routine. Finally, we’ll look at various available resources to help you deal with stress effectively. Whether you’re just beginning to feel overwhelmed or looking for long-term solutions, this guide will provide some useful guidance on managing stress in your life. Ready to reduce the causes of stress?
What is Stress?
Stress is defined as the emotional and physical strain caused by our response to pressure from the outside world. It can originate from a wide range of sources, such as work, family responsibilities, relationships, health concerns, or significant life changes. While some amount of stress is normal and even beneficial in certain situations, prolonged or excessive levels can lead to a variety of physical and mental health problems.
Causes of Stress
Stress can be caused by a variety of factors, including difficult life situations such as job loss and family issues or even seemingly manageable things like work deadlines. Other common stress triggers include financial problems, health concerns, relationship issues, and time pressures. Some people may also experience causes of stress in response to unexpected events such as natural disasters or personal tragedies.
Recognizing Stress Triggers
The first step in managing your stress is to identify the things that trigger it. Pay attention to your physical and emotional reactions when you feel overwhelmed, and try to pinpoint what triggered your reaction. Once you know what causes your stress, you can begin to develop strategies for dealing with it more effectively.
Signs and Symptoms of Stress
The signs and symptoms of stress can vary from person to person but generally include physical symptoms such as headaches, muscle tension, fatigue, digestive issues, and skin problems. Mental health symptoms include difficulty concentrating, difficulty sleeping or sleeping too much, irritability or mood swings, anxiety, and depression. Other common signs include feeling overwhelmed or constantly in a rush; lacking motivation; avoiding social situations; procrastination; frequent crying spells, and reduced productivity at work.
Understanding Your Response to Stress
It is crucial to understand how your body responds to different levels of stress in order to develop strategies for managing it more effectively. Common responses to stress can include increased heart rate, shallow breathing, muscle tension, and feeling overwhelmed. Recognizing these signs in yourself can help to identify when it is time to take a break from a stressful situation.
Coping Strategies
Stress is an inevitable part of life and can be challenging to manage. However, learning how to cope with stress and practice self-care effectively is essential for maintaining good physical, mental and emotional health. Developing healthy habits such as engaging in regular physical activity, practising mindfulness, eating well, and creating routines or calendars can help reduce stress levels daily. By implementing these strategies into your lifestyle, you will start to feel more relaxed and better equipped to handle any challenges that come your way. Additionally, seeking professional help, if necessary, is also crucial in managing thoughts or feelings that are overwhelming or disruptive.
Benefits of Physical Exercise for Reducing Stress
Regular physical activity can help to counter the adverse effects of stress. Exercise releases endorphins that can improve your mood and reduce feelings of depression, anxiety, and fatigue. Additionally, it helps to strengthen your body’s natural defences against stress-related illnesses such as high blood pressure or heart disease. A combination of aerobic exercise (such as running), strength training (such as weightlifting), stretching, and relaxation techniques are all beneficial for managing stress levels.
Eating Healthy Key to Managing Anxiety and Stress
Eating a balanced and nutritious diet is essential for managing stress. Eating foods rich in antioxidants, vitamins, and minerals can help improve mood and reduce feelings of fatigue or irritability. Making dietary changes such as eating more fresh fruits and vegetables and reducing your intake of processed foods, sugary snacks, or caffeine can help to reduce stress levels. Avoiding processed foods and caffeine and getting enough sleep can also contribute to better overall health, which will help with your ability to cope with stressful situations. Avoiding overeating is also crucial, as this can lead to feeling sluggish, irritable, or anxious, which can further contribute to stress.
Mindfulness Practices: An Effective Tool in Dealing with Stress
Mindfulness practices such as meditation, yoga, and tai chi are beneficial techniques for reducing stress levels. By intentionally bringing awareness to your present moment experience and allowing yourself to observe thoughts, feelings, and sensations without judgment, you can recognize patterns in how you respond to stressful situations.
Organizing Your Time: Creating Calendars; Routines
Creating routines and calendars for managing your daily activities can help make you feel more organized, reducing feelings of overwhelm and anxiety associated with stress. By planning out your day, you can prioritize tasks and create a more structured method of managing workloads. This will help to make sure that all necessary tasks are completed in a timely manner, leaving room for moments of relaxation or enjoyment.
Prioritizing Self-Care
It is important to remember that your well-being comes first. It is easy to get caught up in work or daily tasks, but it is essential to take time out for yourself in order to relax and focus on your own needs. Prioritizing self-care activities such as getting enough sleep, spending time with loved ones, taking breaks from screens, journaling, and practising relaxation techniques can help to reduce stress levels and improve your overall well-being.
Seeking Professional Help
Suppose stress has a significant impact on your daily life. In that case, it may be beneficial to seek professional help from a counsellor or therapist who can provide more effective strategies for managing your responses. Talking about how you feel with someone trained in mental health issues can help to alleviate anxious thoughts or feelings of despair. Delta 8 Gummies could also be used as an additional tool for managing stress levels. These gummies are derived from hemp plants and contain CBD, which has been proven to reduce anxiety and stress levels. The gummies are available in a variety of flavours, making them an easy-to-use option for those looking for a quick way to relax and destress.
Simple Tips for Everyday Living that Promote Well-Being and Reduce Stress Levels
Living a healthy lifestyle that is balanced and manageable can reduce stress levels. Taking time for yourself to engage in activities or hobbies that you enjoy, getting enough sleep, spending time with friends and family, laughing more often, creating boundaries between work and home life, and setting achievable goals are all simple strategies that can be used on a daily basis. Additionally, learning how to say no to tasks or requests that exceed your ability to manage them effectively can also help reduce feelings of stress and overwhelm.
Stress is an inevitable part of life, and it is essential to learn how to manage it effectively. Finding the right mix of activities that work best for you on an individual basis is key to reducing stress levels and promoting overall well-being. Remember to be kind to yourself, take a break when needed, reach out for professional support if required, and don’t forget to have fun along the way. With these tips in mind, you will soon find yourself better equipped to cope with life’s challenges with confidence.
I am discussing the negative aspects of office culture today because I spent most of my career in an environment which for most of those years was friendly, inviting, and accommodating. At times, it was also hectic, stressful, and sometimes negative. The negative aspects certainly took a toll on my mental health.
Naturally, when redundancies are announced, the lead-up to this happening, usually means staff don’t experience the same support they once did and there is a negative vibe. Even if this just stems from a feeling that something is not quite right.
I hear all too frequently about managers getting away with treating staff poorly and I’m hoping this is something that will change.
The pandemic and how this impacted negative aspects of office culture
The pandemic certainly made us all stop, take stock of our lives and assess the important aspects. We were literally forced to do this because we couldn’t go anywhere. Those who had thrown themselves into work and other distractions were suddenly forced to spend time at home. Family time was essentially forced upon us and I personally came out the other side thinking it wasn’t such a bad thing.
Whilst I’m sure everyone has had a completely unique experience, there is no denying we’ve all had some thinking time to assess our priorities.
Regardless of the impending redundancy, I look back on these toxic workplace traits as something I just could never allow into my life again. As an introvert and empath with high anxiety levels, I will be looking for a future job role that involves helping people, a charity, a small business and will probably never want to work for a large company ever again. Unless they are amazing (side note – I’ve seen pictures on Linkedin where some big companies are giving wonderful goodie bags to new starters – I think I’ve been in the wrong job!).
Continue reading for a list of the main toxic traits I witnessed in the workplace…
Buzzing around like the world was going to end
This is top of my list for negative aspects of office culture. I don’t know if our managers just didn’t have a clue what they were doing, or drank 10 cups of coffee that morning. But each day there would be a panic-like buzz. Whispering in the middle of the office, taking one another into meeting rooms.
Watching this take place was stressful. The body language created a sense of impending doom. What announcement will they land on us today? What could possibly be that bad all this energy is required? I still ask myself what was so urgent.
On the days I worked 12 hours, I had no home life. I couldn’t function or speak, barely ate, and pretty much went straight to bed for not enough hours before the next workday. This isn’t good for anyone’s mental health, especially when you’re contracted to work 7 hours.
Bullying
I worked in office environments whilst at University. Since then, I’ve unfortunately witnessed bullying. Mainly from managers to employees, but also between employees. Some of it is unconscious bias or someone said, not intending to hurt another individual, but it still happens.
I hear all too frequently about managers getting away with treating staff poorly and I’m hoping this is something that will change.
Not understanding our work-life balance
For years, it’s been quietly expected I will ‘get the job done’. This sometimes meant 12 hour days (I get paid to work 7 hours), working weekends, and doing constant overtime weekly for periods of up to 18 months.
A work pattern like this suggests something isn’t working, better organisation and management are required. It takes its toll on staff and I am hoping since the pandemic, it’s something that will be addressed by companies. You don’t have time for life when you’re working 12 hour days, 5 days a week.
In my career, generic statements were used to guilt people into working more than they should – statements like:
you get paid a lot
we need everyone to chip in and help out
once we get past this busy period, things will be better
On the days I worked 12 hours, I had no home life. I couldn’t function or speak, barely ate, and pretty much went straight to bed for not enough hours before the next workday. This isn’t good for anyone’s mental health, especially when you’re contracted to work 7 hours.
The clique
You’ve probably all experienced this. For me, it’s the ultimate negative aspect of office culture. The manager’s clique or certain employees being favoured because they are friends with managers.
I find it so cringe to think about this now! But it impacts employees in offices up and down the country. What about people missing out on opportunities because of this culture?
It reminds me of mean girls or the cool group at school and everyone else is excluded. Just stop it already!
Bad management
What do they say? Poop rolls downhill in offices. Well, I use the same logic for bad management.
If the person at the top doesn’t know what they are doing, is inexperienced, or frankly, they don’t care, it stands to reason that poor decision making will be a factor and generally employees will have a lack of direction.
I’ve experienced this on many occasions. This isn’t good for anyone’s mental health.
I must also mention I’ve had some amazing, understanding managers as well. The point is, you shouldn’t have to class yourself lucky if you get a good one.
Culture of being afraid to speak up
I know many colleagues who have been afraid to speak up on these issues, for fear of being viewed a certain way by colleagues or risk of losing their job. This is unacceptable and I hope office culture changes in this respect.
Mental health in the workplace
I think this is a good time to talk about how mental health in the workplace can be improved.
From what I see, businesses are starting to incorporate mental health training. My hope is that soon, every manager up and down the country will have the same standard of mental health training and companies will adopt separate absence policies for dealing with people who have suffered from poor mental health. Especially when this poor mental health is linked to workplace stress. After already suffering from mental struggles, you don’t need work pressure added to this burden when you return.
I hope we see change. I am sure you will see me writing about this topic in another future blog post.
Final thoughts
Have you experienced negative aspects of office culture? I would love to hear your experiences in the comments?
Do you think office culture is improving since the pandemic?
The day I had my breakdown, I couldn’t communicate with my hubby on the phone. I was screaming, in a complete mess, making no sense. It crept up on me out of nowhere, like I’m sure it does when it happens to other people. The mind is a fragile and complicated organ.
Understanding the workplace conditions which led to my breakdown is vital for my recovery. I don’t want to make the same mistakes in the future.
It’s only now, 4 months on, I’m trying to make some sense of how I got to this point. Prior to this, I struggled to articulate anything, even down to the weekly shopping list or where we are going out for the day. It’s like someone pressed reset on my brain, but forgot to switch me back on.
For a long time, I thought I didn’t have a choice, but we all have a choice. We can live the life we want, with a mindset change and hard work. I won’t pretend it’s easy, it’s far from easy. But you can do it, and you will thank yourself for changing your circumstances.
Why am I writing this post?
I want to write these feelings down and share them, to reassure anyone in this position you can do something to change your life circumstances if what you’re doing each day is causing you to be mentally unwell. Being aware of workplace conditions that can negatively impact your mental health is good practice.
For a long time, I thought I didn’t have a choice, but we all have a choice. We can live the life we want, with a mindset change and hard work. I won’t pretend it’s easy, it’s far from easy. But you can do it, and you will thank yourself for changing your circumstances.
I want to write this article to help others identify triggers and to also make myself accountable. Hopefully knowing what got me to this dark, horrible place, will prevent it from happening again.
However, I am aware and accept if this does happen again, I will hopefully have the tools to deal with it and get through the negative emotions, without allowing my brain to turn it into something bigger and more destructive. Easier said than done, I know.
Knowing the signs
Obviously, when it comes to mental illness, nobody can predict what might happen and it just creeps up on you. I really had no idea my breakdown would happen, prior to the day. Yes, I was tired and stressed, but this was my job and I’d felt like this on and off for several years. Why would I think this day would be any different?
Anxiety is also something I’ve suffered with throughout my life, but I’m working hard to put measures in place to reduce its impact on me in the future.
There was no warning for me of workplace conditions which led to my breakdown. I thought the stress was normal, something I had to accept.
Other posts you may like to read in the mental health category
These are the stressors which I believe, over a prolonged period of time, led to my breakdown:
1. Work pressure
Imagine being in your own home and afraid to go near your laptop.
I’ve dealt with work pressure for periods of time in the past, but never for such a prolonged period as during the pandemic.
We had a combination of poor management, a completely disorganised workload, a lack of care and direction about the work we were doing and, all of this whilst working at home through the pandemic. The working from home bit I loved. It suited me and I would personally love a future job role working from home on a permanent basis. It was the lack of communication and never knowing where I stood from one minute to the next that caused me huge amounts of anxiety.
We are going through a redundancy process at the moment. With this comes some toxic patterns and a lack of care from the powers that be, but what I experienced during the period of working from home sent me into full meltdown mode.
Over the year, there were a handful of mornings I was scared to open my laptop. That dreaded feeling of ‘oh no, what emails will be there this morning’. I mean, we all have this feeling sometimes, but this was a frequent thing. Imagine being in your own home and afraid to go near your laptop.
One morning an issue arose and emails were sent between departments, insinuating the mistake was mine, I was on the phone with a work colleague and afraid to return to my own house. This is unacceptable and contributed to my breakdown.
2. The disconnect between company ethos and our department
I would regularly see updates from the business and feel like I was reading about a completely different company. Their ethos sounded amazing, a place I would want to work. A place I would definitely feel supported. I, however, did not feel supported.
The reality within our department was a miscommunication to a level I’ve never experienced before. Nobody knew what direction we were going in and it was basically just a mess, where managers were scrambling to keep a hold of what was actually happening.
Several times, I felt like emailing Human Resources and making it clear I wasn’t experiencing the wonderful communications and benefits the company was announcing. But then I thought, what is the point? What will change if I do? I was also scared to speak up, which added to the anxiety I was already experiencing.
Maybe, hopefully, communication from managers will improve following the pandemic. Surely we’ve all learned valuable lessons.
3. No lunches or breaks
Because we were receiving around five emails daily, asking us to reach unachievable targets, this made me feel like I shouldn’t take breaks. I should get on with the job instead. I wanted to do a good job and I’ve always had that mindset as a person.
When your work tasks are completely unachievable and impossible to attain for such a long period of time, this can be soul-destroying. You never have a successful working day and after a while, you feel like a failure. Our targets sometimes changed from email to email, without adequate explanation, like they were made up. When you’re at home, you don’t have anyone to talk to about this, as you usually would do in the office, this made things harder.
Leads me nicely onto the next point…
4. Nobody to talk to
During the pandemic, we all missed face-to-face interaction with our colleagues. Communicating via text message and telephone, sometimes isn’t the same.
It was difficult to receive these emails and have nobody to ask how they felt about it. The point is, we shouldn’t have to ignore crappy emails from managers, but the reality is lots of people do.
Maybe, hopefully, communication from managers will improve following the pandemic. Surely we’ve all learned valuable lessons.
I now realise connections and communication with other human beings are vital for avoiding the negative workplace conditions which led to my breakdown. I am already making connections with other bloggers and organisations I would want to work for. This is something that helped me through my breakdown. You can read more about how I recovered here.
I was correct in my thinking and although I wouldn’t wish redundancy on anyone, I felt better knowing my suspicions had been correct. It was confirmation I wasn’t going crazy.
5. The everything needs doing yesterday mentality
There was one manager who didn’t really listen to anyone. You know those people who talk at you and answer their own questions. And you feel like asking why they even bothered to contact you.
Even just this in Itself, makes you feel you’re not valued or listened to.
The direction coming from the top was “get this done yesterday”. I’d been used to this mentality for a few tasks a week and I can live with that. But when this applies to every task you’re working on, it’s too much! No amount of money is worth this stress.
As human beings, we like to know where we stand, and not knowing, or being able to plan ahead, make any life decisions, the constant worry about money, can all cause unnecessary pressure.
6. An impending doom
I’m quite an intuitive person and somehow I can predict things before they happen. It’s a subtle feeling and I will tell the people closest to me, this will happen today. I’m always 100% sure it will occur. I predicted the national lockdown announcement in the UK, three days before it happened and started preparing our family for it.
Therefore, this was one of the main workplace conditions which led to my breakdown. It was a constant niggling feeling and I just wanted to ask managers to let me know what was so bad and when it would be announced.
Whilst working from home, the daily disorganisation at work gave me a feeling something wasn’t right. I knew bad news would be announced, it was just a matter of when. Shortly after feeling like this, the doctor issued a sick note for workplace stress and anxiety, and the redundancies were announced.
I was correct in my thinking and although I wouldn’t wish redundancy on anyone, I felt better knowing my suspicions had been correct. It was the confirmation I needed to know I wasn’t going crazy.
7. The threat of redundancy
Redundancy is a horrible process for anyone to go through and it can be life-changing, but it impacts someone suffering from mental illness completely differently. I am aware many people are impacted by this, following the pandemic and it makes me sad because I worry about the mental health of those going through the process.
As human beings, we like to know where we stand, and not knowing, or being able to plan ahead, make any life decisions, the constant worry about money, can all cause unnecessary pressure. Life is hard enough, without this added stress.
If you are impacted these issues
If you are impacted by any of the issues raised in this article, Mind.org has a page dedicated to the issue of redundancy and it’s packed full of useful information. GOV.UK is a site I consulted when our redundancies were first announced and I found it helpful. StepChange can help with your financial situation if you are struggling to make payments as a result of redundancy or any other issue.
Final thoughts
I would never solely blame one activity in life for causing a decline in my mental health. I’m a mummy to a toddler, we lived through a pandemic, were confined to our homes. None of these factors helped the situation.
My earlier blog post explains how we financially overcommitted ourselves. All these factors can contribute and the subconscious is a complex thing. I may never know the exact reason I had a mental breakdown. What I do know is I will never allow a job to consume me, I will try my hardest to seek out a role in the future where I can balance work and home life, and any future role must protect, not damage, my mental health.
That’s what I’ve learned and I want other people to know, you do have a choice.
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