The secret of how an anxiety-prone person manages a new blog

If things go wrong, like me losing my whole website one day, I panic. I am pre-dispositioned to act like this. Whilst my anxiety will never go away, I can put tools in place to manage it. I now have to find ways to balance the blog and my anxiety levels.

The excitement of starting a blog means I wanted everything to be perfect and I was eager to upload several posts and progress the blog as quickly as I could.

Pick your battles and only trade your energy where you believe it is worthy.

Like other young families, I have some time management issues. Working around childcare, having a messy hubby, housework, learning a million new things at once, I have struggled with also fitting in self-care. In my free moments, I’m always asking myself whether I should work on the blog instead of resting. I need to remember that I’m still in a recovery period following a mental breakdown, and whilst writing for this blog and speaking out about mental health is helping me, it’s about taking it one day at a time.

It’s lovely to be part of the mental health blogging community. Having like-minded people who know how you feel is amazing, so thanks to everyone who offers me support on a daily basis. Becoming a blogger is the best thing that’s happened to me in a long time.

Tips on how I am currently managing my anxiety levels

Naps

I know I talk a lot about naps on the blog, but they do so much good. My anxiety is worse when I’m tired and therefore I must take time to rest if I don’t want other areas of my life to get out of control.

Brushing off the insignificant things

Naturally, when you suffer a mental breakdown and are going through redundancy, you identify the things in life that simply don’t matter. And you train yourself to not care or use your precious energy on this particular thing in life. Pick your battles and only trade your energy where you believe it is worthy.

Medication

I am still taking anti-depressants and intend to continue doing so for as long as I need them. There is no shame in this, despite the stigma still surrounding the issue.

Without medication, I wouldn’t have been able to get to a place where I could start recovery or let myself heal. Think about a pot on your broken arm or pain medication whilst a sprained ankle is healing. You wouldn’t be able to even begin the healing journey without these measures. Mental health is no different. My hope is that by speaking out, the perception will change.

Not stessing out about things outside my control

I’ve come to realise there are more factors outside our control in our lives than the ones we can do something about. I previously worried about other people and changing things. I don’t anymore.

It’s sometimes easier said than done and I will be honest, at the moment I still have the same reaction to difficult life circumstances. The difference now is, I stop to think about whether it’s the correct reaction and I evaluate this before proceeding.

blog and my anxiety levels

Organising things inside my control

Before pregnancy, when everything kind of fell apart, I had standing orders set up to make bill payments and I was super organised. I am now trying to find some sort of middle-ground. In this middle-ground, the automatic stuff like money, shopping lists, meal planning is taken care of. This leaves time for the more enjoyable elements of life.

I am still working on the plan and hope to have it resolved soon. My family and I can then look forward to a bright future and concentrate on living life.

Working on the blog when it suits me

To clarify, I work at least 3-4 hours daily on the blog, and during the first three months, it was a lot more. Because I have a little one to entertain during the day, I usually work early in the mornings and late at night.

The point here is, I am free to do special things with the little one during the day. We have just started visiting soft play areas and going swimming regularly. This is the reason I would like to turn my blogging passion into a full-time job, eventually. I can then achieve my dream of finally having a work-life balance.

Vowing to never return to what caused my stress in the first place

Long work hours

Pressure to hit targets

The office environment

Significant travel time to work

All the above are things I can control and make adjustments to in my life. I now have the confidence to achieve a future job role or self-employed status which means I don’t have to put myself through this anymore.

For me, any of these factors may cause me to get to breaking point again. It’s now about creating a happy, healthy future and avoiding the impact on my mental health.

Final thoughts

I hope this post has given you some insight on why I started the blog in the first place and how I am managing all elements of life with very little time.

I know these issues impact many families. I would love to hear from you in the comments below. You are not alone.

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blog and my anxiety levels

My review of Kemps Farm, Horsforth pumpkin picking event

If you’re following my blog, you’ll know Halloween is my favourite occasion of the year. 

Unfortunately, I was a bit last minute booking a pumpkin picking event this year. However, I was happy with every aspect of the place we visited. And of course, I had to share my thoughts with all of you lovely readers.

Cue me dramatically demonstrating what would happen with a toy tractor on the morning of pumpkin picking. Yes, a very animated portrayal of exactly where in the trailer we would sit. Hehe. 

Read on to find out where we booked for 2021 and my thoughts on the event…

pumpkin picking event

PLEASE NOTE – This review is solely based on a day out with my family and all views and opinions are my own. Photos were also taken by me.

Booking online

What sold me on booking this pumpkin picking event was the tractor ride to the pumpkin field. I knew our little one would love it. Cue me dramatically demonstrating what would happen with a toy tractor on the morning of pumpkin picking. Yes, a very animated portrayal of exactly where in the trailer we would sit. Hehe. 

Another huge selling point was the great value for money. The price for an adult ticket was £2.00 and you didn’t need to pay for young children. 

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Arrival

When we arrived, the car park was signposted and there were marshalls telling us where to park and how to get on the tractor.

The tractor ride was from one field, over a main road to the adjacent field. But honestly, my little one loved it and it was a great addition to our trip out. 

Every single staff member we met on the day was helpful and friendly and they made the whole experience a lovely outing. 

pumpkin picking event

Arriving in the pumpkin field

Upon leaving the tractor, someone gave us a talk on directions around the pumpkin field. We were also given useful information on which types of pumpkins you could use for cooking. What impressed me was they had grown their pumpkins. Some of the events we’ve visited in the past have clearly bought them in and placed them in a field.

Wheelbarrows were parked up ready for us to collect. At other pumpkin fields, we’ve had to stand in a queue and pay for a wheelbarrow. Not really what you want with an eager toddler who is raring to go. This was a great system. It made it easy for parents to manage unruly toddlers.

There was a one-way system around three fields, with an astroturf walkway all the way around. Helpful if you don’t want to get muddy. Luckily we were dressed for the muddy fields because the places we’ve visited before were a bit like a mud bath. 

pumpkin picking event

As you can see from the pictures, the decorations around the pumpkin fields were great and there were a lot of opportunities to take photos. The sun blessed us with its presence and it made our photos even better. I was also impressed with the open space. You could go off on your own and take pictures without anyone else in them.

Amazing memories. 

Paying and leaving the pumpkin field

We collected our pumpkins. The wheelbarrow was particularly useful for housing our little one when we wanted to get moving. The prices were great and we got a lot of lovely pumpkins for our money. £13.50 for the collection you see here. 

pumpkin picking event

Upon paying we were directed to a staff member handing out bin liners. We were given a generous pile and were easily able to transport our haul. 

Back onto the tractor and to the car park. Of course, my little one had to stop to go full Peppa Pig mode and jump in the puddle. As she was fully suited, with wellies on we let her have some fun. 

Facilities availible on the day

Although we didn’t use the facilities, there was a large gazebo, a snack van serving drinks, face painting tents, and toilets (the portaloos were very clean). 

There was ample parking, plenty of signs directing you where to go and clear instructions.

The whole process was easy and it’s exactly what you need when you have children to entertain.

Final thoughts

All things considered, this is now my favourite farm for pumpkin picking and we will be booking next year. 

Until next year, fellow Halloween lovers.

Let me know in the comments below whether you went pumpkin picking this year. Where did you visit?

What other celebrations did you have for Halloween?

I would love to hear from you.

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pumpkin picking event

A roundup of my mental health-related posts so far

I thought it was time to share my mental health-related posts so far.

As I started this blog due to a decline in my mental health and because I wanted to help other people. I thought it was a good time to reflect on the mental health-related topics I have covered so far.

mental health-related posts so far

August 2021

I released my first post on 12 August 2021. Obviously, a lot of work went on behind the scenes prior to this date. These were the mental health-related posts I released during August 2021:

7 crucial steps I took to gradually recover from my breakdown

Breathe Bracelets – 10 breaths bracelet

September 2021

This was my first full month of blogging, where I really found my feet. I worked very hard to spread the word about my blog.

You must check out this self-heating eye mask for relaxation

October 2021

The month of #blogtober. I decided to take on the challenge. These are the posts I released during the month, which were related to mental health.

5 Tips to Boosting Your Quality of Life as a Mum

World Mental Health day 2021

The stark truth about my last anxiety-filled day and exactly what it felt like

Why it’s vital to understand the workplace conditions which led to my breakdown

5 vital tools to prevent seasonal affective disorder during the cold months of the year

How relaxing our routine transformed our lives

An open letter to my anxiety

How I plan to transform after years of being ruled by fear

Final thoughts

I still feel incredibly privileged to be speaking about my journey and receiving feedback about the fact this is helping other people. It makes my heart smile.

I’ve saved some of the amazing feedback I’ve received. The reason for saving it is because I feel overjoyed at the incredible support I’ve received from the blogging community. THANK YOU, FELLOW BLOGGERS.

Honestly, the Twitter blogging community have kept me going during tough times and I am thankful to be part of such an amazing group of people. Shall we share some more love??

mental health-related posts so far
mental health-related posts so far
mental health-related posts so far
mental health-related posts so far
mental health-related posts so far

Thank you for coming on this journey with me

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mental health-related posts so far

My personal growth as a blogger and my goals for the future

#AD – It’s time for me to look back, at both my personal and professional growth. A reflection period, to help my recovery following a mental breakdown and motivate me to reach my goals for the future. 

goals for the future

Personal growth

Because my personal growth is inextricably linked with my professional growth, I have to talk about my situation. Two significant life-changing events happened which caused a ripple effect and improved my life. A mental breakdown and redundancy at work made me want to live my life differently. I would never have started the blog without living through these events. 

Professional growth

It’s clear to me now, my career taught me a whole host of transferable skills, all of which are required if you want to be a successful blogger. 

I’ve achieved a lot in my three months of blogging and I now intend to up my game and monetise my blog. I had my goals recorded on a spreadsheet before I launched the website and now these goals are becoming reality. 

Goals for the future

It’s easy to compare yourself to others in the blogging world. But the truth is no two people are the same. We are individuals and therefore cannot be compared. But of course, it’s healthy to aspire to be successful and view other bloggers as role models for your success. 

When I talk about blogging goals, there are certain people I have in mind. If in five years I am as successful as they are, I will be happy. Following this path has increased my confidence and now allows me to read other people’s success stories and believe I can achieve the same level of success. Why not? The old me was full of doubt, but not anymore. 

These are the goals I want to reach by the end of 2021

Create and sell digital products 

There are so many platforms you can use to create and sell your products. It’s great to see additional features on social media, making it easier to sell. One of the first tasks I had on my to-do list when setting up the blog was to gain followers on social media and interact with other, like-minded people. 

I am in the process of writing an e-book. In addition to making money to support the cost of running my blog, I want this product to offer valuable lessons to other people and teach them something. Turning my knowledge and experience into something useful for other people is my ultimate dream. 

Worksheets and checklists have helped me get through tough times in life previously. I’ve used them to manage my everyday life and during therapy sessions. I want to create a structured way for other people to benefit from this format. 

Learning is a passion of mine. The blogging world is a constant learning curve and I thrive on it. My ultimate goal would be to create a course for other bloggers. To communicate in a format that is easy to understand and teaches them something they wouldn’t have known before embarking on the learning material. 

To create any of these products, I will be researching and relying on eCommerce platforms. 

Continue to produce relevant, engaging content

The main reason I set up the blog was to get my message out there. I am discussing a subject that is of paramount importance and I hope to change the stigma surrounding mental illness. I, therefore, view it as a duty to keep talking openly and honestly about my mental health struggles. My mission is to help other people. 

Work with brands

The brands I’ve worked with so far were aligned with my content and purpose. I enjoyed finding out about the products and recommending them to other people. I hope to continue down this path. And of course, I have a list of brands I would ideally like to work with. Who knows what amazing opportunities will come my way. It’s exciting. 

Use my skills to create more opportunities

I am currently looking into setting up a second blog and I am excited to create new challenges for myself. 

Using the skills I’ve taught myself recently may also bring future career opportunities. I intend to keep learning. 

What will 2022 bring?

The pandemic had a lasting impact on every area of our lives. Marketing messages are no different and the online world became our go-to for everything when we were unable to leave the house. 

It’s an exciting time to be a blogger and I genuinely enjoy interacting with brands and other bloggers each day. 

Now it’s time to put in the hard work required to achieve my goals. 

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goals for the future

Christmas gift guide my trusted No7 essentials

#AFF

Struggling with what to buy a partner or a loved one? Look no further, I got you covered! Here are my trusted No 7 essentials.

In time for Christmas pressie purchases, I wanted to share with you some of the affordable No7 products I’ve been using for years. Products I wouldn’t leave the house without.

I love No7 products not only because they are affordable, but the Boots points system also allows you to take advantage of offers and eventually spend your points on future purchases.

Quick note: Mummy Conquering Anxiety is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program. Some of the links contained on this page are affiliate links and if you go through them to make a purchase, I will earn a commission. I only recommend products I use myself and think would be useful for you.

Product images courtesy of Boots.com

my trusted No 7 essentials

Why does looking after ourselves make us feel better

I don’t wear much make-up, but I do make a little more effort when I go out. It makes me feel special and glamourous. Especially when my normal life is spent tidying up toddler mess and being lucky to have 30 seconds in the car throwing on some concealer.

It’s no secret that the older we get, the more we need to take care of our skin. Having a good skincare routine is a form of self-care and it’s one I intend to stick to.

However, for me and I am sure lots of other families. It has to be affordable.

No7 Boots Advent Calendar

We can’t talk about my trusted No7 essentials, without, of course talking about the Boots Advent calendar. These are the three bundles currently on offer at the moment.

What an amazing way to countdown to Christmas. By taking care of yourself and having some me-time each day, revealing a new product. Such a treat!

no7 advent calendar
boots beauty calendar
my trusted No 7 essentials

Now its time to reveal my trusted No7 products…

my trusted No 7 essentials

Boots Lift & Luminate Concealer

This is first on the list of my trusted No 7 essentials.

When I visited Boots recently, they didn’t have my usual concealer but I am glad because I came away with this amazing product.

Because of the ingredients, the coverage is great and it blends so well on your face. However, it also feels light, like you’re not wearing makeup. As I have fair skin, with a lot of blemishes, it makes me feel more confident to lightly cover these when I go out.

my trusted No 7 essentials

No7 Match Made Concealer

I’ve used this product for years and I have never been without it in my handbag, on nights out and on holidays.

The product has the perfect balance of moisture and blends well. You can select from a range of shades.

I will be adding this to my Christmas list and stocking up.

concealer

No7 Lift & Luminate Triple Action Primer

I discovered make-up primer a few years ago and honestly, it transformed my life.

When I go out, it takes my make-up from looking not too bad to absolutely flawless and I would recommend it to anyone. I also find it works well with the addition of the concealer. Meaning I get a flawless finish, but my face still feels like I don’t have much make-up on.

my trusted No 7 essentials

No7 The Full 360 Mascara

As I have short lashes and they need some volume, I use this mascara, and it’s amazing.

Applying it plumps my lashes and there are no clumpy bits like I’ve experienced with other products in the past.

Another trusted favourite of mine.

my trusted No 7 essentials

No7 High Shine Lipgloss 8ml

I’ve had the same nude lipgloss for a while now, but I love it. It got me through some work nights out, transforming from day makeup to night makeup. It added a little sparkle when I was having a down day and needed it most. It needed throwing in the bin.

Therefore, I treated myself to a slightly darker nude shade and I love it. I’ve had lipgloss in the past that makes your lips feel dry and you get clumpy bits after a while. Not with No.7. I am so happy I’ve got a new shade to last me through the festive period.

high shine gloss
my trusted No 7 essentials

No7 Lovely Lips Lip Balm

I also treated myself recently to a new lip balm. I previously had the nude colour, but got a slightly darker shade. It goes on like a diluted colour and is very moisturising, but I love the stuff.

lipbalm

Now it’s time to look at my skincare essentials.

No7 Instant Results Nourishing Hydration Mask 100ml

When I am pushed for time and can’t spend long with a face mask on, this product works wonders. The mix of mouse and gel textures leaves your skin feeling fresh.

my trusted No 7 essentials

No7 Essential Moisture Night Cream 50ml

Another trusted product I love using. Basic face cream but it works wonders and leaves your skin feeling refreshed in the morning.

I love a product working for you whilst you sleep.

Essential moisture cream

No7 Protect & Perfect Intense ADVANCED Serum 30ml

I buy this product as a little treat now and again. If my skin is feeling particularly tired, it’s great to have what feels like an overnight boost and wake up feeling a little brighter.

serum

Final thoughts

I hope you enjoyed reading why I love these products.

Do you have a favourite No7 product? Something you just can’t live without or an item that makes you feel a little better on a down day?

Let me know in the comments below.

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A list of my proudest achievements since starting my blog

When starting a blog, self-doubt is real. I’ve lived with self-doubt ruling my daily life for 15 years. It was a daunting prospect to set up something I’ve created and promote it to the world (hopefully ‘the world’ will eventually see what I write).

Because I consider myself the least technology savvy person you could come across, it is a huge achievement I’ve managed to set up and run a blog by myself.

It’s now time to look back at my proudest achievements and future goals for the blog.

my proudest achievements

This is the definition of ‘achievement’ from Oxford languages

achievement

1.a thing done successfully with effort, skill, or courage.”to reach this stage is a great achievement”

my proudest achievements

Continue reading for a rundown of my proudest achievements

Researching

I wasn’t bad at researching, given my essay writing traumas at University. Also, the fact I love finding out new information helps.

Because I literally started this journey by researching late into the night for months, I became great at it. I felt compelled to start a blog. I couldn’t explain why, but something inside me told me I must do it.

Of course, when I googled how to go about doing this, I was directed to Pinterest. It’s how I know all of us bloggers should persevere with our pins. Even though I know it is tedious. Imagine becoming a brand new bloggers source of information. That’s ultimate #blogginggoals.

When I get an idea in my head, I love researching information to support what I’m saying, or highlight there is a lack of information about a particular issue.

Writing

I’ve always loved writing. A lot of my proudest achievements include writing.

However, I honestly believe the more you do something you get better at it. With the help of Grammarly and Yoast, I am now in the flow of how to write and format a blog post.

And other writing opportunities are also coming my way, as a result of me starting the blog.

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Getting over my fear of social media

I honestly think social media made my existing anxiety issues worse in the past. It fed into the negative voice in my head and increased my innate ability to constantly compare myself to others. Because I’m an introvert, I was overwhelmed by seeing everyone’s whole lives playing out online. Even though they were my friends.

Setting up social media accounts for the blog comes with boundaries. Whilst I genuinely love interacting with other people, this is only in relation to the blog. I can take a break or stand back from social media whenever I choose to. It’s exactly what I’m doing if I need to. I also make good use of the block button when it’s required.

my proudest achievements

Being organised

I thought I was organised before. Blogging literally involves wearing several hats daily. Therefore you have to be organised enough to focus on one task and set realistic deadlines. You are accountable to yourself and therefore you have to meet the deadlines you set, otherwise, you only have yourself to blame.

Technical knowledge

SEO, Google Analytics, keyword research.

You will have heard these terms, but probably don’t understand what they mean (I still struggle with the technical side).

I slowly worked my way through each of these tasks and all the other technical and analytical tools you need. I am proud that I’ve only had to ask for help on a handful of occasions and the rest I have figured out for myself. There is always a useful blog post or YouTube video to provide vital information for the task at hand.

Working solo

I loved working from home during the pandemic and I would love to do this full time from now on. I am a homely person by nature and being close to my little one and nursery is helpful. Cutting out traveling time is a huge bonus.

Because you are at home, you have to stay motivated. Luckily I am a very self-driven and organised person. Therefore working solo suits me.

New projects

My proudest achievements have probably been managing several new projects at once.

From August to October 2021, I submitted four guest posts to other bloggers. I was asked to write for a charity anthology. I also produced three adverts for brands. This was in addition to posting on my blog and completing two weeks of blogtober.

I will now be moving on to my future projects, which involve more work and can be time-consuming. I am confident it will all be worth it in the end though.

Watch this space.

Ranking

For a while, I thought ranking on Google was a myth. You look at the stats and think how can this be a thing, nobody is viewing my blog. Then one day it happens.

It happened to me following a weekend away with family. I was feeling deflated. I had writer’s block and my confidence was lacking slightly. I checked my DA score in the bar on holiday and it was 9. I was over the moon. It was a pivotal moment where I felt my hard work had paid off.

Armed with this new information (thanks to Google), I was excited to start the big projects in my goal planner. It was a proven fact that hard work pays off. Therefore, my logic told me more hard work was required.

Improving design and photography skills

When I first started blogging, I thought I would use Canva and that would be the end of it. However, there is no avoiding the fact you will be required to take some photographs. I am learning as I go along. Luckily, my hubby has a professional camera and an eye for a great image. He is helping me with the photos and teaching me. Still lots of work to be done on my photography skills. Hopefully, this goal will factor in a future list of my proudest achievements.

Final thoughts

Who knows where this blogging journey will take me next. It’s great to look back at what I’ve achieved.

Let me know in the comments what you are proud of? What have you achieved lately? What are your personal and professional goals?

I would love to hear from you.

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my proudest achievements

A look back on how far I got with the blogtober challenge

I recently decided to stop the blogtober challenge. However, I wanted to look back at the posts I created, published, and promoted.

Following the blogtober challenge, I am particularly proud of the mental health-related topics I released. I will be honest and confess I was unsure about releasing some of them. But I decided to be brutally honest and share the reality of mental illness. I hope it helps other people.

All the lovely comments and feedback on my posts have spurred me on to continue to ensure my blog thrives. I am now ready to tackle some of the other goals I have and work on bigger projects. I am also starting to see the results of my hard work.

blogtober challenge

Here is a summary of the posts I released during the challenge

My final post of the blogtober challenge

To everyone still taking part

You can do this!

I enjoy reading your daily posts.

It’s the final week of October 2021 – you got this 🙂

Reflecting on the goals I’ve achieved this month

To add some context regarding my blogging journey so far, I released my first post on 12 August 2021.

I found my feet in September 2021 and worked very hard to spread the word about my blog. I then decided to turn my half-written blog posts into the blogtober challenge.

The challenge meant I was busy. It was fast-paced and involved a lot of late nights and early mornings. However, it taught me I am able to maintain quality but also keep up with my goals. It just involves hard work and determination.

All the lovely comments and feedback on my posts have spurred me on to continue to ensure my blog thrives. I am now ready to tackle some of the other goals I have and work on bigger projects. I am also starting to see the results of my hard work.

I now have confidence I am able to break down the next project into manageable sections and complete it.

blogtober challenge

Final thoughts…

I hope you’re all having a wonderful October.

This time of year is so magical. Cold weather setting in, Halloween fun, and the lead-up to Christmas.

After the constraints we’ve faced over the past few years, I wish you all the fun this season has to offer.

Let me know what you have planned in the comments below.

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Why I’m glad the negative aspects of office culture will be left behind

I am discussing the negative aspects of office culture today because I spent most of my career in an environment which for most of those years was friendly, inviting, and accommodating. At times, it was also hectic, stressful, and sometimes negative. The negative aspects certainly took a toll on my mental health.

Naturally, when redundancies are announced, the lead-up to this happening, usually means staff don’t experience the same support they once did and there is a negative vibe. Even if this just stems from a feeling that something is not quite right.

I hear all too frequently about managers getting away with treating staff poorly and I’m hoping this is something that will change. 

The pandemic and how this impacted negative aspects of office culture

The pandemic certainly made us all stop, take stock of our lives and assess the important aspects. We were literally forced to do this because we couldn’t go anywhere. Those who had thrown themselves into work and other distractions were suddenly forced to spend time at home. Family time was essentially forced upon us and I personally came out the other side thinking it wasn’t such a bad thing.

Whilst I’m sure everyone has had a completely unique experience, there is no denying we’ve all had some thinking time to assess our priorities. 

Regardless of the impending redundancy, I look back on these toxic workplace traits as something I just could never allow into my life again. As an introvert and empath with high anxiety levels, I will be looking for a future job role that involves helping people, a charity, a small business and will probably never want to work for a large company ever again. Unless they are amazing (side note – I’ve seen pictures on Linkedin where some big companies are giving wonderful goodie bags to new starters – I think I’ve been in the wrong job!).

Continue reading for a list of the main toxic traits I witnessed in the workplace…

Buzzing around like the world was going to end 

This is top of my list for negative aspects of office culture. I don’t know if our managers just didn’t have a clue what they were doing, or drank 10 cups of coffee that morning. But each day there would be a panic-like buzz. Whispering in the middle of the office, taking one another into meeting rooms. 

Watching this take place was stressful. The body language created a sense of impending doom. What announcement will they land on us today? What could possibly be that bad all this energy is required? I still ask myself what was so urgent. 

On the days I worked 12 hours, I had no home life. I couldn’t function or speak, barely ate, and pretty much went straight to bed for not enough hours before the next workday. This isn’t good for anyone’s mental health, especially when you’re contracted to work 7 hours. 

Bullying 

I worked in office environments whilst at University. Since then, I’ve unfortunately witnessed bullying. Mainly from managers to employees, but also between employees. Some of it is unconscious bias or someone said, not intending to hurt another individual, but it still happens. 

I hear all too frequently about managers getting away with treating staff poorly and I’m hoping this is something that will change. 

Not understanding our work-life balance 

For years, it’s been quietly expected I will ‘get the job done’. This sometimes meant 12 hour days (I get paid to work 7 hours), working weekends, and doing constant overtime weekly for periods of up to 18 months. 

A work pattern like this suggests something isn’t working, better organisation and management are required. It takes its toll on staff and I am hoping since the pandemic, it’s something that will be addressed by companies. You don’t have time for life when you’re working 12 hour days, 5 days a week.  

In my career, generic statements were used to guilt people into working more than they should – statements like:

you get paid a lot

we need everyone to chip in and help out

once we get past this busy period, things will be better

On the days I worked 12 hours, I had no home life. I couldn’t function or speak, barely ate, and pretty much went straight to bed for not enough hours before the next workday. This isn’t good for anyone’s mental health, especially when you’re contracted to work 7 hours. 

The clique 

You’ve probably all experienced this. For me, it’s the ultimate negative aspect of office culture. The manager’s clique or certain employees being favoured because they are friends with managers. 

I find it so cringe to think about this now! But it impacts employees in offices up and down the country. What about people missing out on opportunities because of this culture?

It reminds me of mean girls or the cool group at school and everyone else is excluded. Just stop it already!

Bad management 

What do they say? Poop rolls downhill in offices. Well, I use the same logic for bad management. 

If the person at the top doesn’t know what they are doing, is inexperienced, or frankly, they don’t care, it stands to reason that poor decision making will be a factor and generally employees will have a lack of direction. 

I’ve experienced this on many occasions. This isn’t good for anyone’s mental health. 

I must also mention I’ve had some amazing, understanding managers as well. The point is, you shouldn’t have to class yourself lucky if you get a good one.

Culture of being afraid to speak up

I know many colleagues who have been afraid to speak up on these issues, for fear of being viewed a certain way by colleagues or risk of losing their job. This is unacceptable and I hope office culture changes in this respect.

Mental health in the workplace

I think this is a good time to talk about how mental health in the workplace can be improved.

From what I see, businesses are starting to incorporate mental health training. My hope is that soon, every manager up and down the country will have the same standard of mental health training and companies will adopt separate absence policies for dealing with people who have suffered from poor mental health. Especially when this poor mental health is linked to workplace stress. After already suffering from mental struggles, you don’t need work pressure added to this burden when you return.

I hope we see change. I am sure you will see me writing about this topic in another future blog post.

Final thoughts

Have you experienced negative aspects of office culture? I would love to hear your experiences in the comments?

Do you think office culture is improving since the pandemic?

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Affirmation cards from Mål paper to help inspire and motivate

#GIFTED #AFF

Mål Paper

If you are following my blog, you will know I am all about self-care and I am beginning to put tools in place to manage my anxiety moving forward. I need some help to inspire and motivate, and I am sure you do too.

A technique I have already started using is affirmations. I’ve always had quotes on my walls and in my daily planner to motivate me, but I now intend to go further than this and say these affirmations to myself, out loud, to literally change my way of thinking and become more positive. I’ve spent too long living in the negative.

You can imagine I was over the moon when Mål Paper asked me to review their affirmation cards. Please check them out.

help inspire and motivate

PLEASE NOTEthis is a review of the product and all thoughts and opinions are my own.

Details about the brand

Mål Paper also takes inspiration from the Scandinavian minimalist and clutter-free way of living. As a result, we create simplistic and effective productivity tools that help you to focus on your wellness, fulfilment and potential.

Our collection of products has been designed and produced to foster positive daily habits – with the end result of a happier, calmer and more productive way of living.

You’ve seen my recent post, which includes some gratitude quotes and positive affirmations. 

What a perfect time for me to be gifted these amazing affirmation cards. I was so excited when they arrived and I feel grateful to have another tool to combat my anxiety.

Why I am changing the way I live my life

I have a child now and the main motivation is setting a good example and being a supportive participant in my family. When suffering from severe anxiety in the past, I’ve pushed everyone away, including my long-suffering hubby. 

How can I possibly be on this journey of discovery and not see it through until the end? My eyes have been opened and I know what the problems were in the past. That said, I also know a cognitive behavioural change doesn’t just happen overnight. It takes hard work. 

Because I’m predispositioned to suffering from anxiety issues, due to my personality traits, I also have to work harder than most other people to maintain a good standard of mental health. 

Why it’s vital I finally put tools in place to manage my mental health

I personally believe wanting to change your life isn’t enough. The research says we must rewire our brains, create new habits, and really put in some hard work in order to change for good.

This will take daily work, probably for the rest of my life. Therefore it’s time to put tools in place so it doesn’t feel like hard work. On tough days it’s also important for me to have a solid reminder about why I actively changed my life for the better. 

Through my blog, I also want to help inspire and motivate other people. I am doing this by discussing my honest reality of living with a mental illness and my journey to recovery.

Some cards which resonate with me

We are all at different stages in our life journey and I am starting to learn everyone you meet is unique. We are shaped by our personality, past experiences and therefore different techniques will be needed based on the person you are.

I was excited to receive and open the pack of cards and I also had fun taking photos (maybe my photography skills will improve the more I do it!).

These are some of the cards I was drawn to initially…

1.

help inspire and motivate

What an amazing quote. It resonates with me because I am trying to carve out the life I’ve always wanted. A balance between work and family time. Being my own boss would be the ultimate dream. I am doing this by creating new, healthy routines. Therefore this is one card I will use the most.

2.

help inspire and motivate

I was drawn to this card because I am in the process of healing. Maybe I always will be. I intend to use the power of my mind to my advantage, instead of fighting against it. These are words I can definitely relate to.

Final thoughts

I intend to use this pack of cards daily. I love that they are compact and handy to carry around or dot around the house. They will allow me to visualise positivity, as well as say it out loud. What a great prompt.

You can purchase your deck of cards here.

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Why It’s time to let you in on another one of my passions so you can get to know me better

I hope this post will allow you to get to know me better.

Because I struggle with control issues, due to my anxiety, I’ve realised my love of baking is possibly about a total loss of control: causing mess, chaos and the final outcome is always uncertain!

Maybe I just need some time to completely switch off and let go. I think my mind is glad of the rest. I enjoy the process and get seriously creative with ingredients and decoration. 

In my real life I like everything in order, lists are my best friend. But when I bake, I don’t stick to recipes, I’ve tried many vegan alternatives in the past. 

Quick note: Mummy Conquering Anxiety is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program. Some of the links contained on this page are affiliate links and if you go through them to make a purchase, I will earn a commission. I only recommend products I use myself and think would be useful for other people.

I just love experimenting.

I firstly need to explain I believe I’ve Inherited this talent. About 5 years ago I gave it a try and was strangely amazing at baking. Even down to the small details. I would randomly know when my items were baked without setting a timer, and self-taught decoration tips very quickly, using YouTube videos. 

get to know me better
baking chaos

It’s time for me to tell you all about my baking journey…

I firstly need to explain I believe I’ve Inherited this talent. About 5 years ago I gave it a try and was strangely amazing at baking. Even down to the small details. I would randomly know when my items were baked without setting a timer, and self-taught decoration tips very quickly, using YouTube videos. 

For years I was on a mission to practice my skills by baking for every occasion I could. The only problem with baking as a hobby, or attempting to turn it into more, is you need a lot of time. Which I don’t usually have! 

There is also a lot of debate about whether turning a hobby into a full-time job is beneficial, or whether you would take the joy you experience away from it. I find baking therapeutic, but would I still find it therapeutic if it was my main source of income? Here at some tips, if you feel like becoming a pro-baker. I decided a while ago, it’s something I want to do for fun.

Someone say The Great British Bake Off??

There was talk of me applying for GBBO at one point and I actually read through the application and almost started practicing. Imagine that! Maybe one day.

I’ve even experimented with ingredients and the science behind a baked product. I don’t need weighing scales and I’ve substituted a lot of components to focus on healthy baking or using cheaper ingredients.  

Why I stopped baking 

It’s difficult to gauge exactly when and why I stopped baking. I previously booked annual leave from work to make amazing creations for family members’ special occasions. Maybe it was my all-or-nothing mindset, telling me if I couldn’t make something fantastic there was no point. 

Then life got in the way. The lead-up to my recent breakdown meant I struggled to find time to do anything enjoyable in life. I listened to my anxiety brain and told myself there was no time for baking or anything else I enjoyed in life for that matter. I’ve said goodbye to the negative thoughts now and you can read more about that here.

Has the baking spark come back? 

Since my breakdown, I’ve made an effort to bake, in order to restore some part of my sanity, which was lost in this whole sorry mess. 

It made me feel whole again and took my mind off the severe anxiety I was experiencing. I enjoyed giving out the baked goods and sending them to family and friends. This was one of the main motivations for baking in the first place. You can check out the other techniques I used to recover from my breakdown here.

get to know me better

Who made the cakes during my hiatus? 

During my hiatus from baking, there were times I needed baked goods for special occasions but just couldn’t bring myself to be the baker of these items. The thought of it made me stressed, instead of excited.

For these times, I enlisted the help of online sellers. I ordered a tray of brownies for my partner’s 30th birthday and put them on a very expensive cake stand. This is his fave dessert so they went down a treat! I think they were all gone within an hour. Lesson learned. Next time I will hide the baked goods until later in the party. I think he managed to squirrel some away before the party-goers descended. He isn’t the sharing desserts type, haha! 

Where should I seek out these brownie sellers, you ask?

For those times you’re just not feeling creative, need something as a gift or treat for a friend, or just want a Saturday night in and a box of brownies (no judgment here), look no further….

Today I need to tell you about Bake Me A Gift. They are offering 10% off your first order, using code: AF2110. Valid until: 31st Dec 2021.

Grab your brownies here and make someone happy this Christmas!

For the times I simply can’t be bothered to bake, or I’ve got my fill of self-care elsewhere, online brownies will be my only option.  

Final thoughts 

Are you a bake-off potential candidate or maybe never baked anything before? I would love to hear your stories in the comments below…

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get to know me better