Quick note: Some of the links on this page are affiliate links; if you go through them to make a purchase, I will earn a commission. I only recommend products I use myself and think would be useful for other people.
In the final stages of recovery from my mental breakdown, it was about putting tools in place to survive daily life from now on. Understanding my triggers has helped me reduce the mental impact of certain situations. In this respect, self-maintenance is required.
For example, I know lack of sleep impacts me negatively. Therefore, I have rest or a nap if it’s needed, and I have time to do so. Meditation has also allowed me to feel refreshed, without spending too much of my time on this activity. Practice makes perfect!
We need to start treating mental well-being maintenance with the same importance as physical wellbeing maintenance.
Quick note: Some of the links on this page are affiliate links; if you go through them to make a purchase, I will earn a commission. I only recommend products I use myself and thinkwould be useful for you.
Even when I feel mentally well, I now understand that ongoing self-maintenance is required. A runner doesn’t just go for one run, and then stop. We need to start treating mental well-being maintenance with the same importance as physical well-being maintenance.
It’s essential I build on the foundations of self-maintenance I discuss below.
Positive thinking
Every single day since my mental breakdown, I’ve worked hard to replace negative thoughts with positive ones and try not to let my mind run away with itself. The blog has helped and I feel like I’ve processed a lot of emotions by writing about my experiences.
I also now understand that we manifest and create the world we live in, from our thoughts. Whether these are positive or negative can have an impact on our well-being and our outlook on life.
Planning time for self-care
Regardless of your circumstances, we live in a fast-paced and busy world. It is easy to tell ourselves we are too busy, or tired to fit in self-care and self-maintenance. But it must be done. Constant self-care was one of the main factors in recovering from my mental breakdown. I was forced to be kind to myself. And I’ve continued this far beyond recovery.
Meditation for self-maintenance
You may have already viewed my page on my blog, following my hypnotherapy journey. Because of this transformative course, I am now well-practised at mediating and I get huge benefits from doing this.
Life Coaching
Life coaching is something I tried in the past, but I recently opted for the hypnotherapy course instead. The sessions are made up of assisting you in finding your power and the path you want to take – so essentially it is life coaching with the addition of some other concrete tools you can use for the rest of your life.
Maintaining connections
I have written on the blog before about hiding away from social situations during my anxiety-filled days. Making new connections and being honest with my family and friends about my struggles, allowed me to heal. Following my breakdown, the support network I had was vital.
I now make a point of ditching any relationship which doesn’t serve me (not everyone in life is supposed to get along). And I seek out, value and nurture connections which align with my values. Favouring like-minded people has allowed me to finally attain the career I want and be surrounded by people who want to help others. All of which have a positive impact on my mental well-being.
Affirmations for self-maintenance
If you follow the blog, you will know I have affirmation cards dotted around the house, Particularly around my workspace, to motivate me and encourage me to think positively. Especially if I am having a bad day.
The ones I use are centred around career, empowerment and confidence. But there are so many other decks available, depending on your preference. Maybe you want a journal to record gratitude or affirmations in a different format. Take a look at the various options below:
Albert Einstein famously said that life was like a bicycle: if you don’t keep moving forwards, you lose your balance.
What he meant by this was quite interesting. He was saying that you really do need to go with the flow rather than remain stagnant. You have to aim at something, otherwise, everything becomes such a chore.
Here are some reasons why you should keep moving forward.
The Past Cannot Serve You
The first reason for moving forwards is that the past really cannot serve you. Regardless of how well (or badly) things went in the past, nothing that happened can determine what goes on in the present moment (unless you happen to be in prison).
Unfortunately, the human mind has a habit of holding onto things from the past, either in the form of regret or nostalgia. When you don’t stop moving forward, though, the need to remain in the past disappears. You’re just focusing on the situation in front of you, instead of looking backwards.
You Experience New Things
Regularly moving to new areas is something that everyone should practice. That’s because you have an opportunity to experience new things. Staying in the same locale your entire life can get a little stale.
Buying Meriton Apartments in one city, and then renting them out when you go to the next is a great way to fund your lifestyle and keep moving forward. You can try new work, explore different areas, and meet new people. It’s all incredibly exciting.
You Can Start Again
Life doesn’t always work out the way you want it to. You can find yourself in situations that trap you or make you feel bad.
But when your fundamental driving force in life is to keep moving forward, these situations don’t last for long. Sure, things will go bad from time to time, but you always have the opportunity to move on. Starting again is something that you can absolutely do.
When you travel around the world, you learn a lot about life. But when you stay in the same place, you don’t put yourself in situations that help you grow.
You Improve Your Skills
Many people work the same job for years on end because they worry about the consequences of moving on and doing something different. They wonder what might happen if they strike out and do their own thing. They fear losing money and falling out of contact with colleagues. They worry about what will happen to their network, pension, or social status.
But these fears aren’t usually worth listening to. Sure, you could wind up a little poorer, but there’s always money to be found. There are always new opportunities to make a good go of life.
Your Failures Aren’t Final
Lastly, constantly moving forwards ensures that your failures are never final. Yes, things will go wrong. But a life of motion and activity will always produce fruits, regardless of the depths of its lows. If you stay in the same place, then your failures are final.
Firstly, I should make it clear I am writing this mainly because I want more people to be aware the #JoinIn Twitter hashtag exists. It’s important people know there is someone out there to support them. Even if it isn’t possible to do this face to face right now.
I previously volunteered for a befriending service and did home visits with an elderly person. But the service also offered much-needed telephone conversations. As you can imagine, this could mean the world to a lonely older person. Therefore, I’m aware of how valuable this contact can be.
To clarify, this isn’t about me being a hero or superior to anyone else. I truly believe we are all muddling through life. Any one of us could be lonely one day, or find ourselves in the depths of depression during the Christmas period. If everyone could understand this, or always try to lead with a kind heart, I don’t think the stigma surrounding mental health would be as bad as it is.
What happened on Christmas morning?
All I can tell you is, I felt compelled to support others on Christmas Day. And the #JoinIn Twitter hashtag was my way of doing it.
I will be honest and say when I first saw the campaign in the lead-up to Christmas, I was dubious about committing. The only reason for my reluctance was self-preservation. I’ve learned to look after myself first. I obviously also want to help others and it’s the reason I started my blog. But how can I help others without preserving my mental strength?
Despite my reluctance, something happened on Christmas morning which made me feel I needed to participate. I looked at our little family and I felt grateful. Lucky to be seeing my parents and finally getting to teach my toddler about Santa.
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Giving back
I genuinely loved interacting under the #JoinIn Twitter hashtag on Christmas Day. I still had quality time with my family, but I was also proud to give something back. The Twitter community helped me out of a dark place. To recover from a mental breakdown.
In a similar way to my blogging journey, this then made me think of all the people who wouldn’t have this luxury. We couldn’t see some family members because of a positive covid test. Therefore I was all too aware some people might just be isolated this year to avoid spreading the virus.
These selfless, kind people needed someone to connect with. To clarify, this isn’t about me being a hero or superior to anyone else. I truly believe we are all muddling through life. Any one of us could be lonely one day, or find ourselves in the depths of depression during the Christmas period. If everyone could understand this, or always try to lead with a kind heart, I don’t think the stigma surrounding mental health would be as bad as it is.
I’ve found receiving and giving the following to others really does help to transform your life.
Compassion
Gratitude
Kindness
Support
Empathy
Love
Hugs
Understanding
I wish everyone would show more of these qualities. The world would be a better place.
For anyone who needs it right now, feel free to sign up to my freebie library and download the self-care checklist
Sarah Millican is an amazing human being for starting the #JoinIn Twitter hashtag and also taking time out of her Christmas day to chat with everyone. I honestly think it’s so lovely. Through her shows, she also raised an amazing amount of money for Mind. A charity doing amazing work to support those with mental health problems.
When confronting my own mental health issues in the past, I’ve always found therapy helped. Something about talking to a stranger means you lower your guard and can often be more honest. I truly think the same concept works online. I’ve sometimes felt more supported by strangers online than people close to me.
My wish and the reason I am writing this
I want to spread the word to everyone. this support exists on Twitter. I would like the chat to continue and I know there are some people who want to do this.
The main thing we all need to be aware of is there is someone there to talk if you feel you need it. And that is priceless. It warmed my heart to see the exchange of kind messages!
Final thoughts
Please come and chat with me in the comments below and let me know what you think of the #JoinIn Twitter hashtag.
20% off discount code MCA20 until the end of the year (Including Advent Calendars)
If you follow my blog, you will know I love The Body Shop. Since being a teenager and buying animal-shaped soaps on my trips to the nearest town centre with friends. I’ve loved the scents and the ethos behind the company.
In recent years, I now require high-quality products. It’s all about taking care of my skin and having a little self-care and indulgence in my life. As a busy mum, lack of sleep sometimes means bad skin, dark circles and all the other wonderful downsides of motherhood. A rescue plan to make me look and feel better is required.
I was overjoyed when The Body Shop sent me a package full of their best sellers to review
I’ve been looking for a product to even my skin tone and I am so impressed with the results after using this scrub. It’s my go-to product now. And I’ve already ordered more. As a busy mum, having an even skin tone and refreshed look means less maintenance. Given that I quickly rub concealer on my face, in the car before the nursery drop. Anything that avoids this extra task, I will pay good money for.
Over the summer, it is nicer to have no make-up on your face. These days it just sweats off me anyway. This charcoal mask is a weekly treat I can use to enable me to have a fresh face for summer outings.
I must admit, I love the fruity body butter from The Body Shop. But they do tend to be a little thicker in consistency. This one is my new favourite. Simply because it’s so light on your skin and totally refreshing for summer. I can imagine taking it on holiday abroad with me and feeling extra moisturised after a day in the sun.
We’ve all heard of this one. I would say it’s one of the most iconic Body Shop products. I’ve wanted to try it for a while and my hubby is in need of some because he works outside in all weather conditions.
The texture is lovely and it smells amazing. You can literally feel it immediately helping your skin. And I love that feeling.
This isn’t a product I would normally choose. I have dry, frizzy and unmanageable hair. However, the smell and the texture are so refreshing. And I actually really love using it now. It makes me feel cleaner than using my previous shampoo. Unlike other shampoos, you use a very tiny amount, which means it goes further than other products I’ve used in the past.
Discount code
If you would like to purchase any of these items, I have a discount code for you to use…
20% off discount code MCA20 until the end of the year (Including Advent Calendars)
20% off discount code MCA20 until the end of the year (Including Advent Calendars)
LAUNCHING – 18 September 2022
Quick note: Some of the links contained on this page are affiliate links and if you go through them to make a purchase, I will earn a commission. I only recommend products I use myself and think would be useful for other people.
Small in size but packed full of treats – the Box of Wishes Advent Calendar contains skincare, face masks and beauty tools. Hydrate with our Shower Gel before nourishing your skin with our Body Butter infused with Community Fair Trade Mango Seed Oil from India.
This calendar celebrates the women of Chhattisgarh, India, and through our Mango Seed Oil, we continue to support them with job prospects and opportunities for independence.
What’s included?
STRAWBERRY SHOWER GEL 60ML BRITISH ROSE HAND CREAM 30ML RASPBERRY BORN LIPPY 10ML MINI RAMIE BATH LILY BRITISH ROSE SHOWER GEL 60ML TEA TREE FACE WASH 60ML SATSUMA SOAP 100G MANGO BODY BUTTER 50ML SHEA HAND BALM 10ML VITAMIN C SHEET MASK 18ML SHEA SHAMPOO 60ML SHEA CONDITIONER 60ML PINK GRAPEFRUIT SHOWER GEL 60ML STRAWBERRY LIP BUTTER 10ML MANGO SHOWER GEL 60ML HIMALAYAN CHARCOAL MASK 15ML HAIR CLAW ALMOND MILK SHOWER CREAM 60ML BRITISH ROSE SHOWER SCRUB 50ML VITAMIN E SHEET MASK 18ML SHEA SOAP 100G STRAWBERRY HAND CREAM 30ML AVOCADO SHOWER CREAM 60ML ALMOND MILK BODY BUTTER 50ML
Our Ultimate Advent Calendar is bursting with iconic full-sized bestsellers as well as exciting new products, beauty tools and everything you need to nourish your body and soul. Scrub, soften and slather your way to your most beautiful Christmas yet with our luxurious Sheet Masks, nourishing Body Butters, and rejuvenating Body Scrubs.
What’s included?
AVOCADO SHOWER CREAM 250ML CAMOMILE CLEANSING BUTTER 20ML EDELWEISS LIQUID PEEL 100ML MANGO HAND BALM 30ML BOOST HAND WASH 250ML MORINGA SHAMPOO 250ML STRAWBERRY LIP BUTTER 10ML RAMIE BATH LILY MORINGA CONDITIONER 250ML VITAMIN E HYDRATING TONER 250ML VITAMIN E SHEET MASK 18ML MANGO BATH BLEND 250ML BRITISH ROSE BODY YOGURT 200ML ALMOND MILK LIP CARE STICK 4.2G PINK CLAY FACIAL KONJAC SPONGE HIMALAYAN CHARCOAL MASK 15ML PINK GRAPEFRUIT SHOWER GEL 250ML MANGO BODY SCRUB 50ML AVOCADO LOTION TO OIL 200ML BRITISH ROSE FACIAL MASK 15ML ALMOND MILK HAND BALM 30ML EDELWEISS SHEET MASK 21ML HIMALAYAN CHARCOAL NIGHT PEEL 30ML SHEA BODY BUTTER 200ML SLEEP PILLOW MIST 100ML
Final Thoughts
If you follow the blog, you will know I am a huge fan of The Body Shop. You can check out my other posts featuring their amazing products below:
Discover the secret to smoother skin with Edelweiss skincare. Just like Drops of Youth™, but even better, now enriched with double the concentration of edelweiss. Our formulas help to gently clear pollutants and help protect skin against pollution. Made with 99% natural-origin ingredients, it helps to smooth and protect the skin, delivering 24hr hydration.
A master of resilience, edelweiss is a tiny flower with all the power to survive and thrive on the mountainside. This magic marvel protects itself against harsh environmental conditions by producing its own antioxidant, leontopodic acid. That’s why we made this mighty little plant the star ingredient of our Edelweiss skincare. Enriched with edelweiss extract, our clever formulas help maintain skin’s natural moisture barrier and smooth the way to glorious, fresher-looking skin.
Why do I need to look after my skin?
No human being is getting any younger, sorry. And I’m personally showing signs of ageing. Including pulled muscles from sleeping, fatigue and sometimes problematic skin.
At this time of year, it’s even more important for us to look after our skin. And I’m so happy I now have a daily routine to complete with these products.
The packaging is great and seeing the items in my fancy little bathroom basket, encourages me to look after my skin. As a busy mum, it’s important to have a routine you want to do each day. Because let’s face it, some days I barely get time to go to the toilet alone. Skincare seems to come much further down the list of priorities. And from now on, I plan to bump it up the list!
Let’s dive into these amazing products from The Edelweiss Range
This cleanser from the Edelweiss Range is lovely to use. I sometimes don’t like using them, because washing the cleanser off with water can make my skin dry. But the consistency of this product is perfect. Just the right amount of foam when mixed with water. And it starts as a gel – something I have never seen before.
It leaves my skin feeling fresh, without feeling dry!
What does it do for you?
Made with 95% ingredients of natural origin, our new Edelweiss Cleansing Concentrate washes away impurities and pollution, leaving skin feeling smoother, fresh and luminous – just ask the 119 women who tried (and loved!) our new cleanser in an independent user trial*.
This skin-loving facial wash works its magic, leaving skin feeling awakened and purified, yet soft and comfortable – no tight feeling here!
Ready for the best bit? We’ve enriched it with edelweiss, which is naturally (and rather uniquely) strengthened with leontopodic acid known for its antioxidant properties. The tiny edelweiss plant is so resilient and powerful that its extract has 43% more antioxidant power than retinol. Pretty extraordinary, right?
This lightweight gel-to-water cleanser transforms from a translucent formula to a gentle bubbly foam suitable for all skin types. Our packaging is also 100% recyclable too. What’s not to love?
How to use this product
Massage a small dollop onto wet skin, lather and rinse.
Daily cleanser
Suitable for all skin types, including sensitive skin
I love a good serum. You just know it’s doing your skin the world of good and this one is lovely. The bottle and pipet just make me feel great like I am investing in my skincare routine (made with recycled glass too).
The actual consistency of the serum is lovely on your face. Probably the best face serum I’ve ever used.
What does it do for you?
Suitable for all skin types, including sensitive skin
Leaves skin feeling fresher and smoother
Helps protect the skin from pollution
Made with 99% ingredients of natural origin
Now enriched with double the concentration of edelweiss
Certified by The Vegan Society
Non-comedogenic (doesn’t block pores)
Dermatologically tested
Our bestselling Drops of Youth™ Concentrate just got even better.
Made with 99% ingredients of natural origin, it only takes a few drops of our new Edelweiss Daily Serum Concentrate to leave skin looking smoother, fresher, stronger* and plumped with 24hr moisture.
But what makes our new concoction so exceptional? We’ve now enriched every bottle with double the concentration of edelweiss, which is naturally (and rather uniquely) strengthened with leontopodic acid known for its antioxidant properties.
We’ve enriched our vegan serum with natural-origin peptides too, just for good measure. Derived from rice, peptides are known to help maintain the skin’s natural moisture barrier.
This light, non-sticky, fast-absorbing formula also forms an invisible layer over your skin to help protect it from indoor and outdoor pollution (perfect for all you city types), which can lead to dehydration, dullness and premature skin ageing.
How to use this product
First up, have a good cleanse with our Edelweiss Cleansing Concentrate. This will help wash away all that grime, pollution and makeup, so your serum works even more effectively.
Squeeze 2-3 drops of our serum into your hand and gently massage it into cleansed skin every morning and night.
Give it a few seconds to sink in before slathering on our Edelweiss Smoothing Day Cream or Edelweiss Intense Smoothing Day Cream.
This product from the Edelweiss Range, is a light cream when it’s applied to your face and has a very subtle scent. Totally refreshing after a hard day at work, or in the harsh cold of the autumn months.
What does it do for you?
Suitable for all skin types, including sensitive skin
Leaves skin looking smoother and stronger
Leaves skin feeling ultra-soft
Helps maintain the skin’s natural moisture barrier
Helps protect against indoor and outdoor pollution
Made with 97% ingredients of natural origin
Enriched with edelweiss
Certified by The Vegan Society
Dermatologically tested
Give your complexion a deeply nourishing treat with our new Edelweiss Intense Smoothing Day Cream – it’s the ultimate hydration boost.
Made with 97% ingredients of natural origin, it only takes a tiny dollop of our new Edelweiss Intense Smoothing Day Cream to leave skin looking smoother, fresher, stronger and plumped with 48hr moisture.
An intensely rich and nourishing cream, this non-greasy formula has a silky texture and melts into the skin effortlessly, helping protect against indoor and outdoor pollution and leaving skin feeling deeply nourished, firmer and ultra-soft.
It helps retain moisture and maintains the skin’s natural moisture barrier.
Scoop out a pea-sized amount and smooth it all over your complexion day and night. Enjoy that feeling of supple, silky-smooth skin.
How to use this product
First up, have a good cleanse with our Edelweiss Cleansing Concentrate. This will help wash away all that grime, pollution and makeup, so your serum works even more effectively.
Scoop out a pea-sized dollop and massage into cleansed skin every morning and night.
Give it a few seconds to sink.
Check out all my previous blog posts… for The Body Shop
Fancy a discount code on any purchases you make? Visit The Body Shop – 15% OFF CODE MCA15 until 9 am on 12th November
Maybe you’re looking to start Christmas shopping. I have bought a few bits for my family already, but lots more to buy. Don’t forget the discount code when you shop…
Now we are coming to the end of my hypnotherapy journey, it’s fascinating to look back at the process and how the mechanics of the Perma Hypnotherapy model work. And how my life has drastically improved. I completed the journey without having the roadmap to hand. But I have naturally improved each of these areas of my life. And it’s only at the end of the journey, that the full picture of the work we completed is revealed.
I finally feel ready to take on this role. Like I am recovered from my mental breakdown fully, and it’s time to grab these opportunities with both hands. And it’s exactly what I recently did. Why not finally use my experiences to do some good in the world and help other people? It doesn’t feel like work!It feels like I am finally thriving.
Sam – Mummy Conqering Anxiety
Stay tuned for a final, collaborative blog post from Kevin and me – to follow within the next month
The areas of my life which have drastically improved…
Finance
Career
Development
Home
Relationships
Health
PLEASE NOTE: This post contains some affiliate links.If you go through affiliate links to make a purchase, I will earn a small commission, at no additional cost to you. I only recommend products I use myself and think would be helpful for other people
“The optimists believe defeat is just a temporary setback.”
There were many techniques and processes we used throughout our hypnotherapy sessions. But one, in particular, stuck with me. The way Kevin explained this process during our sessions, was by giving a certain part of the brain an instruction to improve or change things. Then the worker or factory makes it happen, behind the scenes. This is the reason that people who complete hypnotherapy courses often see drastic changes, seemingly out of nowhere. Changes are happening on a sunconcious level and this is definitely something I experienced.
Let’s take a look at how each of the areas of my life has dramatically improved as a result of completing this Perma Hypnotherapy course
Finance
My finances before hypnotherapy
I didn’t always have a good relationship with my finances. Back in the anxiety filled days, I would impulse buy things to make myself feel better. Unsurprisingly it never worked and usually made me feel worse. Lately, we’ve had a tough time financially as a family, due to the life-changing circumstances we’ve experienced.
My finances right now and looking to the future
It’s only now I am taking more control of my life and the direction I want to go in, that I am prioritising financial health. Because of this, I feel less fearful about my financial future and a lot more optimistic. As a family, we have financial goals and we have actually started to tackle some of them.
I think the main feeling I have is EVERYTHING WILL BE OKAY – I no longer live in fear that we might have a lack of money or one of us will be made redundant. I am safe in the knowledge that if that happens, we are resilient enough to get through it.
“Optimists recover from their momentary helplessness immediately. Very soon after failing, they pick themselves up, shrug, and start trying again.”
I spent years in a high-paid career that I kind of fell into. Don’t get me wrong, at times I enjoyed it, but ultimately it wasn’t in line with my values, or what I wanted to do with my life.
It is unsurprising that when I did the character strength test, helping other people came top of the list. It seems I wasn’t going to find my calling until I was fulfilling this need. Not only did my mental breakdown allow me to help other people via a blog, (a communication channel I love – writing and getting great feedback, from an amazing online community – who helped me during my darkest days) but it also allowed me to make career changes.
The significant changes I recently made
It was time to finally use the skills and confidence I had gained from the hypnotherapy course to change my situation. I spent a lot of time putting together a fresh CV, using my transferable skills and essentially selling myself. The old me would have come up with an excuse not to apply for the job. The new me just went for it and threw myself into the challenge. Despite still feeling anxiety.
You want to know the main thing I did during my two career change interviews? I was honest. About my mental health, and my reasons for wanting to help people. It’s as if I connected on a human level and feedback from the first job role, after my redundancy, was that my lived experience was taken into consideration. And valued. It was amazing to hear this.
Where am I now?
Because of funding, it was unlikely I could stay in my current role past the new year. Therefore I made a recent decision to apply for another job in the charity sector, doing something I absolutely love. This role involves slightly more hours as well, which will help our financial family goals.
I finally feel ready to take on this role. Like I am recovered from my mental breakdown fully, and it’s time to grab these opportunities with both hands. And it’s exactly what I recently did.
Why not finally use my experiences to do some good in the world and help other people? It doesn’t feel like work!It feels like I am finally thriving.
“Here is the exercise: find one wholly unexpected kind thing to do tomorrow and just do it. Notice what happens to your mood.”
Human beings are constantly changing and we should always want to update and improve ourselves. This is exactly what the Perma model does. It asks you to reevaluate your character strengths and values based on your current life situation. In giving your brain new instructions, related to the life goals you have, you naturally ditch old behaviours that don’t serve you anymore.
How life circumstances can and will change your values
We’ve all heard people talk about ‘life-changing events’ and until you’ve gone through this process yourself, it doesn’t make much sense. Over the last four years, here are some of the life changing events I have experienced: Pregnancy, antenatal depression during pregnancy, started taking anti-depressents when pregnant, severe anxiety about the pregnancy process, a traumatic birth, mental health problems for two years following pregnancy. Returning to work following maternity leave, for the pandemic to hit less than one month later. Adjustment to working from home. Financial impact on our family. Change of routine (partner off work for 12 weeks as vulnerable and nursery closing). Followed by a mental breakdown due to work pressure (literally being afraid to return to my own home and open my laptop). Returning to work, reluctantly. Redundancy a few months later. A further five months off work, which I had to use to recover and financially funded myself. Changing careers and slowly putting my life back together using self improvement techniques.
Motherhood
Motherhood is a great example of how my values completely changed. Subconsciously, my full-time, demanding job was no longer fit for purpose. But I didn’t realise this until things went horribly wrong. The day I sat down to do the character strengths test, it was apparent that some of my values had changed. Motherhood was now my priority and I needed a career to fit around this, to create a work-life balance. Working with my current life situation, instead of against it.
Home life
Home life during my demanding career
Based on everything I’ve described above, you can imagine our home life wasn’t previously very happy. In my most demanding career days, working 12 hours (not including travel time), I was completely exhausted. I would ask my now-hubby not to talk to me all evening. I was beyond tired, pretty much all the time and this was no life for each of us. Yes, I earned a lot of money, but I never had the time or energy to spend it. When I did, we would splash out to “reduce the stress”.
We are not always conscious of our decisions
However, at the point of giving birth to my little one, I didn’t consciously realise this job wouldn’t fit my circumstances anymore. Let alone decide it wasn’t even something I wanted to do. As human beings, we plod along on autopilot, and it’s completely okay if you’re doing this. The key factor is that you need to be happy, not stressed out and mostly content with your actions.
If there is something missing, as there was with me, it might be time to look into a Perma Hypnotherapy course.
Relationships
Our family life
My hubby and I are both strong-minded. We have some communication problems, due to our brains being rewired completely differently. It’s taken us time, patience and hard work to understand each other. As you can imagine, during my mental breakdown and the aftermath, I wasn’t a very happy or easy person to be around,
When I started this hypnotherapy course, I felt like I could make some changes on my own. But I had an overwhelming feeling that something was still missing. I knew I needed help or guidance of some sort, and I am so glad Kevin arrived and posed the opportunity for working together.
Because it’s been so vastly life-changing – it is truly one of the best experiences of my life.
Our relationship communication following my hypnotherapy course
I am not going to tell you our communication is perfect. We will always face the same barriers as before. The significant difference is now, I am more open, honest and in control. By in control, I mean I often walk away when communication isn’t going well. I understand that the brain reacts automatically to stressful situations. A bit like when there is no point talking to a toddler mid-meltdown. Well, the same applies to us as adults. Our primitive automatic response kicks in and it’s best to calmy compose yourself before entering into the discussion, if you can.
What hypnotherapy has helped me do is be more in control of this response. I’ve spent time, meditating, and working on myself, and I am now able to realise when a situation will become heated, or when I am about to react badly myself. Something I never mastered in my life before now.
A little mention for the parents
It’s important to mention the role of parents. Our communication was poor before we had children. Any parent out there will be aware children bring with them new challenges. We are lucky these days if we can fit in any adult conversation, with a loud toddler running around. It’s therefore important to make time to discuss adult matters or reconnect with one another. We now make time. Yes, every day is far from perfect and it’s sometimes a while until our next reconnecting time. But I am confident and assured it will happen. More importantly, I now realise that spending time doing reconnecting has huge benefits for our family. And it’s, therefore, a must!
Health
Because of the significant link between physical and mental health, I have struggled physically for a number of years. Mainly with symptoms of irritable bowel syndrome. My health is still not perfect, but I do now understand when my anxiety symptoms are causing a physical reaction in my body. And I can tell the difference between a food related or mind related reaction.
In moments where I am suffering physically, I try my best to overcome whatever is causing me stress or anxiety, in order to alleviate the symptoms.
Final thoughts
I now have a toolbox I can use to maintain a great standard of wellbeing. Mastering trance sessions has helped me access a place of calm within myself and talk to myself on a sunconsious level. To reevaluate where I am in life and make any nessecery changes.
Kevin provides practical guidance and support – as well as a vast amount of accessible resources which you have for life! I am thankful for this journey and looking forward to the bright future I have ahead of me.
If you’re ready to start your self improvement journey, get in contact with Kevin. You wont be disappointed.
“The takeaway lesson from positive psychology is that positive mental health is not just the absence of mental illness.”
I will soon be coming to the end of my Hypnotherapy course. What a journey it’s been.
I feel totally transformed as a person, and I wanted to provide a further update on where I am. Both with my self hypnosis skills and my current life situation. Read on for more details about Perma Hypnotherapy and how to book your therapist!
I don’t recognise the person I am now. But I am so happy to meet this new version of myself. And my only intention now is to keep progressing in life. Dealing with stress when it arises and becoming resilient to the challenges life throws our way.
Hard work pays off
To clarify, this journey has been long, enjoyable, difficult at times and emotionally exhausting. You can’t expect to change your subconscious brain, or master self hypnosis, without an impact on your emotional energy. This is the nature of inner work. It takes time and effort to make significant changes.
However, regular breaks in between sessions and a whole heap of self-care have helped.
Booking a therapist
Should you decide now is the time to improve your life, I recommend having a therapist to guide you. It enables boundaries to be set, a slow, methodical approach to the work you are doing. Agreed sessions help me to remain focused and accountable.
Also, the wealth of knowledge I’ve been given by Kevin just isn’t something I could have picked up from Google or textbooks. I wouldn’t know where to look. I think it’s important to have a qualified guide who can adapt the work you do, to your individual needs.
Following this great course, I now have the tools I need to move forward with self-hypnosis.
Self hypnosis
Practice makes perfect, in any area of life. Now I’m at the end of the process, I’ve cut down my meditation time, from 40 minutes to just six. Which means I can still fit it in around a busy lifestyle. More importantly, I’ve taught myself a technique for reducing the stress life causes.
Recent past VS future self
The Perma model is all about looking to the future and creating the version of ourselves which serves us best. One of the exercises we completed was looking at a recent past image and also a happy one I could envision for the future. During my sessions, I had the recent past image of too many things going around in my head and being overwhelmed. Then a really happy memory had been playing with a balloon with my little one at soft play.
I wanted to create a visual – and you can see the difference…
I am actively creating a happy image whenever I can fit in family time and memory-making. But I am under no illusions about the reality of anxiety. It will always be here. It’s a mechanism that can help people, with me it just needs a bit of control. Something I am now equipped to do moving forward.
Life update
From an anxious, nervous wreck, to a more confident person. I’ve applied for another job position I’ve wanted to do for a while. Really, it’s my dream job and means the career change I made back in May was the correct decision and has led me to this point.
From where I was mentally and career-wise, this is huge progress. I am proud of myself. Something I’ve probably never said before! Ever.
Final thoughts
Finally, my wants and desires are lined up with my priorities and goals. All because I am being open and honest, putting the work into myself and finally standing up and taking the opportunities I want.
I don’t recognise the person I am now. But I am so happy to meet this new version of myself. And my only intention now is to keep progressing in life. Dealing with stress when it arises and becoming resilient to the challenges life throws our way.
“Yes, your transformation will be hard. Yes, you will feel frightened, messed up and knocked down. Yes, you’ll want to stop. Yes, it’s the best work you’ll ever do.”
Robin Sharma
AD / PR – please note – the sessions have been gifted in exchange for my honest thoughts about the process
My recent struggles
I haven’t had a great time over the last few weeks. We’ve had yet another sickness bug in the house. On top of this, I’ve felt burnout, stress and depression. Whilst I am now starting to look back on the situation with hindsight, a few weeks back I was in the midst of serious brain fog. And I didn’t have a clue what I was doing. Negative thoughts started creeping back in and I was in self-destruct mode for a short time. I am currently in the midst of transformation and didn’t expect a setback.
Self-care requires constant maintenance
It’s a great reminder that I will never really be free of anxiety or stress. None of us will. And the vital part is self-maintenance. Like physical self-care, mental well-being is something we must stay on top of.
Transformation isn’t sweet and bright. It’s a dark and murky, painful pushing. An unravelling of the untruths you’ve carried in your body. A practice in facing your own created demons. A complete uprooting, before becoming.
Victoria Erickson
The techniques I am learning
The techniques I am learning in my solution-focused hypnotherapy course, centre around emptying your stress bucket regularly. I’ve experienced the catastrophic implications of not doing this. And I intend to never return to that place again.
Recognising the self-destruct feeling
Lately, I was feeling, reckless, and rebellious and was starting to pay attention to the negative thoughts inside my head. Now this phase has mostly passed, I am able to look back with logic and say my relationships weren’t the greatest. In our house, there was no priority on genuine communication, which eventually has consequences. This, coupled with stress, burnout and physical illness, isn’t a good combination.
I felt like you might just before something great happens. Ever felt totally anxious or flat before an exam, driving test, or a change of some kind? I feel like these growing pains are a sign, that change is happening. And I have to ride it out and continue.
How is my hypnotherapy course going?
I am now halfway through my hypnotherapy sessions. During the trance parts we are initiating change directly with my subconscious mind, therefore I don’t consciously know some of these changes are happening. As quite a controlling person, it’s an adjustment period for me.
Transformation is difficult for a reason
If the transformation was easy, we would all just say one positive sentence to ourselves and that would be the end of it. How dangerous would this be for anyone susceptible to negative thinking though? it could easily go the other way. We have to work hard to implement lasting change.
If you do not change direction, you may end up where you are heading.
These blog posts, following my sessions are literally me providing a snippet of what I’ve learnt each week. It’s a slow process and I don’t have the complete picture yet. But I’m getting there. Building on my existing character strengths is helping.
The top nine character strengths on my list were no surprise to me. I am completing my homework, which delves deeper into your character strengths and what they mean. The learning parts of these sessions are so interesting, and then we put them into practice, with homework and pre-recorded trance sessions.
A few things occurred to me whilst completing this exercise on character strengths:
I was sad because, during the period of burnout from work and my subsequent mental breakdown, I showed none of these character strengths at all.
I’ve said the words before “I was a shadow of myself” but reading about these traits in depth made me feel it. Doing this work reaches your subconscious and allows you to access parts of your brain which were unreachable before. Naturally, this can be revealing and also quite emotional.
For a long time, I’ve questioned why my mental health turned for the worse and whether it was my fault. I think it’s human nature to assign blame, but that’s also a pretty narrow-minded view. And I realise that – I always have.
Why I started these sessions
When I started these sessions, I said I was searching for answers because a piece was missing, and I wasn’t able to be fully happy. There was still a part of me that was stuck, even though I have dramatically changed my life recently.
Let’s rewind for a second to one month after my mental breakdown – this is what I wrote on that day:
I never want to return to this place, and the key is building mental strength and resilience.
Character strengths
The character assessment I was asked to complete is the VA institute on character test. However, I did it before when I was younger, because I remember all the questions. That said, it’s been over 15 years since I’ve been able to provide any real meaning to it.
What if we could learn how to see and appreciate our and others’ strengths rather than being debilitated by a weakness focus? How would that positively impact resilience, well-being, achievement, and life satisfaction? How might that help us rise to the challenges we face? Truly wise people—individuals, parents, teachers, coaches, and leaders—create the conditions for themselves and others to genuinely flourish. Developing an awareness of these strengths helps us to focus on “what’s strong” instead of on “what’s wrong.”
I honestly can’t wait to jump back on the laptop and go through the rest of my character traits. This journey is exhilarating and exciting. I look forward to embracing the new version of myself at the end of it.
We are all a work in progress and therefore we should shout from the rooftops about our progression. I hope this series emphasises that.
Final thoughts
I believe we are all on a journey. Relationships, learning experiences and growth come to us at the right time. Maybe when we are willing to acknowledge the areas we need to grow in.
If you’re ready to start your journey to well-being, book a free discovery call with Kevin today.
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