anxiety

Book Corner, Book Reviews, Mental Health, Tools for managing anxiety

12 Books & Courses For Managing Anxiety

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I wanted to write a list of great books by people who’ve found creative ways to manage their anxiety levels. In addition to this, I will also be letting you know about some courses which are geared towards wellness.

managing anxiety

Quick note: AD-AFF-GIFTED Some of the links contained on this page are sponsored and affiliate links. If you go through an affiliate link to make a purchase, I will earn a commission. I only recommend products I use myself and think would be helpful for other people.

Shall we dive into the list of great resources to help you with managing anxiety?

Education – courses for managing anxiety

Charlotte Lewington

Charlotte is a bestselling co-author, educator and consultant helping children and young people to
find their voice, be seen and feel validated. There is nothing she is more passionate about than
making sure children know that they are loved and love themselves from the inside out. During her
own childhood, Charlotte faced many struggles that only made her stronger. Through these
experiences, she learnt that you can either sit down and cry about things or you get up and you move
on. Learning the lesson being shown to you.

After 16 years of experience within different health and childcare settings, Charlotte gained a degree
in psychology and is currently working towards a master’s degree in children and young people. Charlotte spends most of her time delivering training to nurseries, schools and organisations offering
workshops and retreats relating to emotional well-being.

Her mission is to provide support in order to bridge the gap with the mental health crisis that we are
currently experiencing. In between all this, you will often find charlotte travelling the world and making the most out of life.

You can view and purchase all of her courses on Udemy UK.

Invest in your future. Udemy online courses up to 80% off during our Cyber Sale.
Charlotte Lewington Courses

Details you need to check out

Please head over and check out her Facebook group – Children’s Mental Health Support for Parents & Educators | Facebook

She also offers

1-2-1 support sessions if anyone is feeling lost or finding the queen’s death a trigger. For anyone finding it challenging with children going back to school or children managing anxiety about anything, parents or carers can book a call. She is also currently looking for people to be involved in a book collaboration.

Miss M Online courses

I recently wrote about how important it is to nurture a business-minded child. And more importantly, teach essential life skills that are usually lacking in the mainstream school system. You can check out the full blog post here.

Well, it’s time to bring you the latest from this amazing platform. Check out some of the courses available below.

What’s the latest?

Why not check out the new business board game? What an amazing gift for a young person this Christmas!

Business Board Game
managing anxiety
Ready to help your child?
managing anxiety
Other Courses

Discount code…

Click here & apply discount

Centre Of Excellence

Centre Of Excellence has a range of courses related to managing anxiety, wellness and alternative therapies.

Here are just some of the courses on offer…

Anxiety Management Diploma Course

Dealing With Depression Diploma Course

Mindful Mental Health Diploma Course

Yoga Diploma Course

managing anxiety
Centre Of Excellence

Head over and check out all of their amazing learning resources. Maybe you want to buy the gift of learning for a loved one or friend this holiday season. You know someone who is currently managing anxiety and needs some assistance.

Books for managing anxiety

You can check out my page, dedicated to all things books! Feel free to browse the other book-related posts on my blog

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I also have a page dedicated to managing anxiety

Rachel Ann Cullen’s book, Running for Our Lives

My thoughts

Running For Our Lives is about how running helps people overcome life challenges and mental health struggles. It touches upon how it helped Rachel reclaim her identity after she became a mum. In addition, it contains human stories and experiences from ordinary people.

I knew this title would resonate with time on some level. But I was unprepared for how much I would feel an emotional connection to the stories. A literal pang in my heart because this journey of sharing our mental health struggles is also one I’ve been on myself. I couldn’t put this book down, thanks to honest writing. Not to mention, the sheer power of connection between human beings who have one shared cause. 

“It enables us to silence the chimp and write another story for ourselves – one where things become possible.”

Running For Our Lives

“These are people who have chosen to live fiercely and to be fully alive. They are no longer content with the alternative.”

Running For Our Lives

“mental illness is not concerned with rational thought. It will eat you up regardless.”

Running For Our Lives

“Perhaps it is you seeing the tiniest chink of light in a very dark place, discovering that you have a new friend in the world – one whom you have never met.”

Running For Our Lives

Buy the book

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Waterstones

Bookshop.org

Sara Barnes’ book, The Cold Fix

The Cold Fix is about the healing power of cold water immersion in overcoming physical and mental pain. Or anguish including osteoarthritis, seasonal sadness, migraines, alcoholism and overthinking. It’s about growing older and exploring new opportunities; menopause, body image and confidence.

My thoughts

When reading the book, my initial thought was that I was intrigued as to why people do this and I find it fascinating that such an extreme activity can help someone mentally.

I particularly like the sensory and meditative experience which comes with this technique. It feels similar to how I probably feel when doing meditation.

“Coming here on my own had indeed added a risk factor, but it had also motivated and driven me to climb, literally, out of my comfort zone and rediscover a world that had been out of my reach for too long”

Sara Barnes’ book, The Cold Fix

“The cold water has given me the key to unlock myself within a place I didn’t know existed: the community of cold-water swimmers right around the world. What binds us all together is the cold and how it makes us feel: brave enough to tackle even the toughest of life’s issues.”

Sara Barnes’ book, The Cold Fix

Buy the book

Amazon

The Book Depository

Waterstones

Bookshop.org

Jo Moseley’s Stand-up Paddleboarding in Great Britain

Stand Up Paddleboarding is a guide to paddle boarding. However, Jo explains the sport has got her through grief, anxiety and empty nesting. It’s brought her identity back outside her roles as a mother, daughter, sister, and friend. And her commitment to the environment has strengthened. Back in 2019, she became the first woman aged 54 to stand up paddleboard coast to coast across northern England. Picking up litter and raising money for environmental charities.

My thoughts

The most striking thing about this book is the great images of places to visit. You feel transported there, and it’s wonderful. You are experiencing an adventure alongside reading about Jo’s story. There is a real variation in locations across the UK and I was glad to see some near where we live. It also makes me want to visit the places I haven’t visited and take in the scenery for myself.

The book also includes practical tips on how to get started, if you’re interested in starting your stand-up paddle-boarding journey

“A chance to walk on water, and I hope, appreciate that we all belong there too.”

Jo Moseley’s Stand-up Paddleboarding in Great Britain

Buy the book

Amazon

The Book Depository

Waterstones

Bookshop.org

Michael Waters

You may remember me including Michael Waters in a previous blog post.

Buy the book

Amazon

The Book Depository

Waterstones

Bookshop.org

Recent projects

He has recently been writing for some projects, aiming to help young people with their mental health. If you follow my blog, you will know I am totally on board with this. The current cost of living situation we are facing in the UK is only going to increase mental health problems among young people. Ultimately, it is up to us to raise awareness.

One is about how becoming guise-wise can really help reduce the mental health issues of young people (and not so young!)

Why? Because so many are the result of comparing ourselves to others, often obsessively,
and to a disproportionate emphasis on relatively minor or very specific but not all-defining
differences. Young people are especially prone to these practices.
Supposing I’m a teenager preoccupied with my gender identity. Maybe I suspect I’m
different in this respect from most of my friends. At one time, gender identity was not an
issue for all but a tiny number of kids. Now it’s an issue for a lot, but that’s not the main
point. The main point is that if I am a teenager with gender identity concerns then part of
that will involve placing myself on a spectrum of gender gradations. I’m defining myself by
what I am not and I’m probably defining my whole self primarily in terms of gender identity
markers. This means that I’m not foregrounding all the many things I share with my peers –
other aspects of identity, beliefs, preferences, interests and hosts of others that I share with
everybody on the planet. Rather, I’m over-focusing on one thing that’s distinctive about me,
one particular difference.

Becoming-Guise-Wise:
How to dissolve the mental health issues of the young – Dr Michael Waters

The other is about making commonality-first, not difference-first how we should best respond to others – this would be the best legacy for the Queen since this is what she did in her life

She experienced diversity, more than anyone who has ever lived. No one else has been up as close and personal to such a variety of individuals in such a variety of settings. No one else has had more first-hand experience of as many different social and cultural groups. Who else has made official visits to over 117 countries and carried out over 21,000 official engagements, to say nothing of walkabouts and other unscripted exchanges? It’s also clear that she cared deeply for many of those to whom the word “diversity” is usually applied – minorities and the marginalised.

The Queen’s Legacy: Commonality-First – Dr Michael Waters

Workbooks for managing anxiety

I had to share the workbooks that personally helped me with managing anxiety, during the down periods in my life. I still have these on the shelf by my workspace. They proved to be so beneficial in my time of need.

My Bookshelf at home

Final thoughts

I hope you found these tools for managing helpful anxiety. Maybe a book you want to purchase something for yourself or a loved one?

Let me know your favourite book or course – I would love to hear from you in the comments.

managing anxiety

Recent posts on the blog

Feel free to check out some of the other posts on my blog:

Mental Health, self-care, World Mental Health Day 2022

Reflecting On My Tough Mental Breakdown Journey

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My mental breakdown happened in May 2021. A culmination of a difficult pregnancy, work stress, birth trauma, no self-care whatsoever, lack of sleep for a prolonged period and caring for a small child. I found the whole period overwhelming and there were not enough hours in a day to juggle the unmanageable load. The breaking point seemed to come when my workplace started adding too much pressure on everyone. Up until this point I was keeping my head above water, even though hindsight tells me it wasn’t a healthy way of living.

You have some pretty random thoughts when you’re in the midst of a mental breakdown and you cannot decipher fiction from reality. All the thoughts passing through your mind become your reality and you rely on the people closest to you to tell you which ones you should listen to.

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mental breakdown journey
mental breakdown journey

Everyone is entitled to their own opinion and I know some people are dubious about awareness days. I totally agree with the point that mental health should be spoken about every. single. day. However, I will use awareness days to talk about my own personal experience. If one person who wasn’t aware of my situation, learns something new, I am happy. For me, it is all about raising awareness. In the hope that one day in the future, these small actions will amount to huge systematic changes.

Today I want to talk to you about where I am with my mental health journey and how long it took to be well again

Full system reboot

In previous blog posts, I discussed the feeling of my brain switching off and it couldn’t be restarted again. Throughout the aftermath of my mental breakdown, I spent my days pretty much switched off completely. Sitting on the sofa for hours on end, watching TV, but not really paying attention to anything. There was no sense of time. Depression made my cheeks hurt. I never thought you could get a cheek ache from a sad face, but you can.

My friends and family were very adamant about the fact I should continue a “normal” routine. I hate that word, because what is normal? It has a different meaning for each individual and I think the word acts as an unattainable standard. This is true in my life, anyway, so I avoid using the word.

Battling with your own mind is a daily challenge

During this period of recovery, every action, movement, and the daily task was a challenge. I had to work myself up to get a bath. My hubby pretty much forced me to go on a long walk one day and it took every ounce of energy I had to get out of the house. I still look at these pictures and remember the pain and general numbness I felt.

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As it’s #worldmentalhealthday tomorrow, I’ve written a blog post reflecting on my journey, from mental breakdown to present day! Check it out over on the blog 💚 #mentalhealth #mentalhealthmatters #mentalhealthawareness #selflove #selfcare #hope #rockbottom #struggle #progress #mummyblogger #mummyanddaughter #mumsoftiktok #mums

♬ This Is Not the End (Speech on Depression & Mental Health) – Fearless Soul

Childcare and mental illness

During this period, I absolutely focused my energy on looking after my little one, on the days she didn’t attend nursery. But, sometimes I just didn’t have the resources and therefore a lot of it fell to my hubby and parents to help out.

She also knew something was wrong and would come and “look after” me. Young children have a sixth sense and they can pick up on emotions, even if you think you’re hiding them well. I still feel mum-guilt for taking time out for self-care, sometimes. Especially napping in the afternoon if I need to. I’ve come to realise there are precautions I need to take in order to maintain a good standard of mental well-being. And I will always be honest with my little one, about emotions and why self-care is needed. Parents cannot parent well if we don’t look after ourselves. It’s a constant battle.

Bringing me back to life

My family and friends surrounded me with love, but I was emotional, worn down, and temperamental. It would be months before I had my life back, my personality and gained a sense of identity again. Depression strips you of all these things. The system reboot is what it says on the tin. You are stripped back to factory settings. A blank canvas. And hitting rock bottom is a horrible experience. But there is hope. Things can get better. But I won’t lie and say it is easy. It is one of the hardest things I’ve done in my life.

mental breakdown journey

The self-care routine that helped

During this period I was off work, and largely by myself, whilst everyone around me went about their daily lives. I spent my days having long baths, using all my trusted self-care products. My local park became my haven and I would sit on a particular bench, soaking up nature, thinking about life and watching the world go by. A world I wasn’t fully part of yet. In my mind, I was a bystander, invisible to everyone else.

My friends and family were very adamant about the fact I should continue a “normal” routine. I hate that word, because what is normal? It has a different meaning for each individual and I think the word acts as an unattainable standard. This is true in my life, anyway, so I avoid using the word.

I honestly never thought of the secondary impacts of being depressed. But there are so many. As the money organiser of the house, being switched off, reset, and rebooted isn’t exactly great for maintaining a household, or remembering to pay bills. I just didn’t care about organising life anymore. And it impacted our family.

I started baking to bring myself back to life and clinging onto anything I previously loved, to ignite a passion. To bring back a spark. But I still felt unhappy, and numb. I had affirmation cards and motivational quotes scattered around the house. These massively helped and I still use them to this day. I even visited the local spirit church, in the hope of finding some peace. It worked.

Toxic workplace culture

Reluctant to carry on as normal, when I was off work due to mental health problems, I was scared and filled with irrational fears. What if someone from work sees me? What would they think? Looking back, these thoughts were the negative anxiety voice in my head. And they were created from working in toxic workplace cultures for so long. Something I will never go back to!

Dichiperhing fiction and reality

My family were right. Normality, routine and self-care were all needed. A focus on my health, not the workplace which had basically sent me to this negative place in my mind. Why on earth did I still want to focus on them? But the mind does this. You have some pretty random thoughts when you’re in the midst of a mental breakdown and you cannot decipher fiction from reality. All the thoughts passing through your mind become your reality and you rely on the people closest to you to tell you which ones you should listen to.

What mental illness really looks like

I see a lot of debate on this. The answer – every single person will be impacted by mental illness differently. I hid my anxiety for years. therefore I looked fine. But I wasn’t. That said, I look back at the photos just after my mental breakdown and I remember how I felt. Going through them today actually makes me quite sad. I need to not dwell on them for too long.

The photos show bad skin, a blank look behind the eyes, and tiredness. Throughout my journey back to recovery, I sometimes compared these pictures with ones where I looked slightly happier. To me, it meant progress. When you’re in the midst of recovery, it is sometimes difficult to see any progress and look at the situation objectively.

mental health

There was an element of ‘putting on a brave face’ for my little one. But mostly, I accepted my situation and allowed myself to feel the pain and numbness. Something I had masked for so long was finally let out! In order to heal, you have to acknowledge your situation. And I had battled with anxiety for too long.

The journey back to life

I still have gripes about the NHS and the procedures in place to help someone who has suffered a mental breakdown. Looking back, the doctors didn’t really focus on support around me and my circumstances. I didn’t feel heard, or looked after. A doctor pretty much told me they cannot be responsible for me staying off work any longer and I would have to take it up with my workplace. A workplace they knew had put me in this situation and was not helping me during the period of time I was unwell. During telephone calls with the doctor, I was distressed, and emotional, asking for help. And I felt like a burden. They made me feel like I was being dishonest to get time off work.

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Systematic change in mental health care

It is important to say, I know NHS staff are overworked, unpaid and bound by ridiculous policies. However, they are also human beings. For anyone who watched the recent Panorama documentary, when did we stop caring for other human beings, just because we have a certain job title?

I am writing this post today because there is clearly a lot of work to be done around mental health awareness. A systematic change must happen.

I’ve accepted I will never be fully healed. We are all a work in progress and life will continue to throw us challenges. Our job is to work on how we respond to adversity.

Allowing adequate time for recovery

At the time of writing this post, it has taken me a total of 18 months to consider myself fully recovered from my mental breakdown. Our financial circumstances took a hit as a result. I was expected to return to work, by both the workplace and the NHS when I wasn’t ready or well enough to. Why aren’t we looking after people who find themselves in this position? Both in the respect of health and finances. If you had a broken leg, your sick note would be issued for longer, without question and I am sure you would be entitled to some sort of financial help. Arguably, fighting a battle with your mind is worse than a physical ailment. So why as a society do we treat people with mental illness so unfairly?

Finances and mental health

I honestly never thought of the secondary impacts of being depressed. But there are so many. As the money organiser of the house, being switched off, reset, and rebooted isn’t exactly great for maintaining a household, or remembering to pay bills. I just didn’t care about organising life anymore. And it impacted our family. If you or your family are impacted by similar issues, Mind has a great section on how mental health can impact finances and vice versa.

Where am I in my life now?

At this point, I finally feel somewhat recovered. My hypnotherapy course has provided the tools I need to move forward with a weekly self-care routine. It’s a way I can look after my mind and keep myself healthy. I’ve accepted I will never be fully healed. We are all a work in progress and life will continue to throw us challenges. Our job is to work on how we respond to adversity.

Reading and writing help me and I am busy managing three blogs, launching a Gumroad shop and a T-shirt business.

I also finally feel able to take on more hours at work and look to the future. But also keep in mind that my family life is a priority as well. This being the case, I am taking steps to plan our next five years as a family. We need slightly more money to set in motion everything we want to achieve. But I still want us both to have one day per week with my little one. And of course, a family day together.

Final thoughts

Ultimately, hitting rock bottom allows you to create a blank canvas. You start afresh with brand-new building blocks. And you have the power to change things in your life that no longer serve you.

It’s strange to say this, but hitting rock bottom has transformed my life. Would I choose this experience if I could go back? No! But am I thankful for it? Yes.

mummy conquering anxiety
Mental Health

How to Fight Off Anxiety

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Anxiety can have you in a grip if you’re not careful, and if you are dealing with the symptoms of anxiety, you know that it can feel suffocating. No one wants to feel like they’re in a chokehold and anxiety is exactly what keeps you in that locked-in space. 

The symptoms of anxiety can pull you down and make you feel like you’re drowning, and whether you’re actively seeking anxiety management therapy or you are exploring ways to exercise the adrenaline that comes with it, you need help and support. Below, we’ve put together some of the best techniques that you can use to fight off anxiety and finally let that monster go.

Image source: Pexels

Get some medical advice. Anxiety can happen to anyone at any time, but chronic anxiety can ruin your life. You can get cannabis for anxiety from an alternative doctor, but it’s not a bad idea to speak to a doctor and get a referral to a specialist. Sometimes, anxiety comes from other issues such as depression and you need some support in that case. The help you get is vital for your continued recovery so don’t be afraid to ask for it!

Work on refocusing. Sometimes, distraction works a charm when it comes to anxiety and anxiety has two main issues: mental panic and physical discomfort. You could experience a racing heart, stomach distress and muscle tension when you’re feeling anxious, and instead of being pulled into interception, you can work on refocusing so that you don’t have to feel the mental and physical components of anxiety. 

Visualisation can work! Meditation is not just quack medicine. You can bet that you can calm the mind and the body when you visualise yourself in a calm state and do so in a calm place. The mind can impact the body in powerful ways and you should consider vivid visualization to calm yourself down to fight off the anxiety. Thinking calm thoughts or using visualisation methods to redirect yourself can work to improve the panic you’re feeling.

Embrace mindfulness practices. It’s important that you work on your psychological process and mindfulness practices can help you to do that. It’s all about living in the present as fully as you can and accepting what you can and cannot control. The whole point of mindfulness is to feel the here and now without fear and worry. You need to be in touch with your mind and body so that you can notice the sensations you’re feeling and combat them where you can.

Learn to relax. Oh, relaxation! Not easy for the anxious-minded out there. You can learn to do this by doing a workout. We know, that workouts are not easy when your mind is busy being frozen but expelling the adrenaline from your body can help to flood it with the right hormones so that you can finally feel calm and relaxed again.

    Anxiety doesn’t have to floor you. You can fight the monster and win.

    Mental Health, Tools for managing anxiety

    Tackling Constant What-Ifs With Simple Practices

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    Anxiety is a form of stress. However, they are not the same. It is not uncommon for people who experience an extremely stressful situation to believe they have seen and survived anxiety. Dealing with high stress deserves all the respect in the world. But the main difference between anxiety and stress is that stress tends to have a tangible trigger, such as an urgent work project, for example. 

    Anxiety, on the other hand, has long forgotten its trigger. Someone who has gone through a disturbing experience that was stressful at the time could develop an anxiety disorder as a response, which means they could get anxious reminiscing about their previous experience, facing a new situation that shares common points with their experience, or even imagining what would happen if they were to go through the same thing again. Anxiety is the world where what-if questions live. Unfortunately, what ifs have no trigger. So, the typical advice to avoid triggers may not be useful at all. 

    How do you manage the what-if scenarios in day-to-day life? 

    Learn to know your mind

    Controlling your mind is an impossible challenge. However, getting to know what makes you feel vulnerable and which mindset can influence your what-ifs could be a game-changer. That is precisely where keeping a journal can make a huge difference to your anxiety. Indeed, a journal allows you to play out some of the possible scenarios safely while reminding yourself of the positive things in your life. Listing the good and happy things in your life can help significantly. It is easy to lose yourself in the distress of a what-if narrative. But the positive aspects of your life can act as sanity lights that take you back to safety. 

    Besides, a journal can also let you track mood swings and habits, so you can identify times when you are more susceptible to anxiety. 

    tackling

    Talk about it

    What makes anxiety especially difficult to manage is social and emotional isolation. Anxiety can cut you off from your friend and family circle as you find it hard to express your thoughts and be heard. As such, what ifs drive loneliness? Being alone with your thoughts is never easy, especially when your thoughts get the best of you. Unfortunately, very few friends are mentally and emotionally astute about the stages of anxiety. But talking with someone who understands what you are going through and isn’t going to judge you for it can transform your experience. Expert psychologists at Three Seas have developed dedicated programmes to provide counselling and telehealth to their clients. Finding a therapist you can trust to manage and control what-if scenarios will offer the support you need to:

    • Free yourself from the spiralling anxiety trap
    • Learn to recognise dangerous thinking habits
    • Unlock your courage by voicing out your fears 
    • Discuss potential techniques and coping mechanisms that could help in the future 
    • Talk medication if needs be — why suffer alone when there are solutions out there? 

    What ifs are the enemy of an anxious mind. But, every enemy, ever the most fearsome ones, has weaknesses. What ifs lose their power when you can recognise them for what they are, name them, understand which habits grant them power, and ultimately remind yourself that they don’t control you. Is it easy? No, it never is. But, hopefully, these tips can help you feel less vulnerable to their soul-crushing darkness. 

    tackling
    Mental Health, Mindset change

    My New Beginning Following A Mental Breakdown

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    **Post updated – 14 July 2022**

    #MentalHealthAwarenessWeek

    #StressAwarenessMonth

    #MentalHealthAwarenessMonth

    In true Mummy Conquering Anxiety fashion, I wanted to post something real and honest for Mental Health Awareness Week this year! I want to remind you all, these posts are hard for me to write and probably, for you to hear. However, the topic is relevant and important. Creating my new beginning, in respect of my career, was the best thing I ever did. And I know other people are experiencing the same treatment at work.

    I second guess myself about whether I should publish these posts and therefore, this one has been in the pipeline for a while. However, now is the right time to release this post. Because my work situation is now vastly different. I am a different person, with a different outlook. BUT I will always be a mental health advocate.

    my new beginning

    The back story 

    Here goes. I wrote this post a while ago, as a means of getting through one of the most stressful times in my life. As it happens, changing my situation was also the most life-changing. 

    Following total burnout in my job, I suffered a complete mental breakdown. Cue falling to the floor, tears, not making any sense. Like someone switched off my brain. And it wouldn’t restart. At the time, I didn’t want it to. It was the lowest point of my life. I’d suffered from low points with my mental health in the past. High anxiety levels and depression were common in times of stress, but it was never this bad. 

    The culture must change. We can no longer pile an unreasonable amount of pressure on employees and expect them not to eventually burn out. 

    My personal experience

    The return to work – almost at my new beginning

    Following months’ off work and pressure to return, I went back into the workplace. And eagerly awaited a redundancy date. Having an end date in sight, kept me going.

    Ultimately, I was temporarily throwing myself back into a situation where miscommunication and downright rudeness in the workplace, had led me to a mental breakdown. Going back into that situation, for even a day, was going to be a mammoth task. Remember when I returned, I didn’t know how long I would stay in the role. And I don’t do very well with the unknown. It’s one of the biggest drivers of my anxiety. Knowing where I stand and having a routine helps keep it under control.

    My life is different and much happier, and I now have support in my new workplace. And I am thankful for the journey because it taught me so much about my mental strength in challenging times.

    Getting back into it

    Upon my return, I was left alone for the first month, with everyone telling me “we want to make sure you’re okay“, “bear in mind your mental health” and I knew it was bullshit. It was a line they had to say to appear supportive. That’s what some workplaces do. In this day and age, for some businesses, it’s all talk, no action. And I think it’s despicable. I would rather the business be honest and not have a mental health policy at all, rather than provide empty words on such an important topic.

    Jobless, ‘unemployed’ was soon going to be my label. All of a sudden I felt a lack of self-confidence. A lack of security. An urge to review my money situation and sort out bills that still needed paying, with one less income. But I still had not recovered fully and didn’t have the energy. A battle between wanting to prioritise myself for once, but lacking the motivation to do so. 

    I hope EVERYONE starts to place the same physical illness value on mental illness. Especially after we’ve all endured so much trauma lately. 

    Poor management

    Another factor in all my previous job roles, was a lack of knowledge at the top. Yes, managers are there to manage, not necessarily understand how to do your job. But if they don’t have a clue about the work the people they are supposed to be supporting do daily, what’s the point? How will they ever recognise the stress triggers of overworked staff? How do they even know what too much work is?

    From a human perspective, we should all be able to communicate appropriately with someone whos suffered a mental breakdown. But this takes training and awareness!

    I’ve written previously about how I witnessed rude, biased, and bullying behaviour in workplaces I was part of, and this spans my whole working life. Although I wouldn’t relive the pandemic if I had a choice, I do hope it’s brought significant changes to the office environment in the UK. The culture must change. We can no longer pile an unreasonable amount of pressure on employees and expect them not to eventually burn out. 

    Where it all went wrong

    My first anxiety-filled morning began a while after I returned to work. When you’re constantly having to justify yourself and the work you are completing, it is exhausting. This is what I was being asked to do on this occasion and given my mental health history, I think there was a better way of doing things.

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    My thoughts in hindsight

    Throughout all of this, I do have some grasp of the fact that employees in the department were under daily stress because of an impending redundancy and I take on board the fact this can impact a person’s behaviour. But it still doesn’t make poor behaviour towards staff correct. And it certainly doesn’t help my already fragile anxiety levels. From a human perspective, we should all be able to communicate appropriately with someone whos suffered a mental breakdown. But this takes training and awareness!

    The redundancy announcement 

    It is hurtful when you’ve invested so much time and energy into your career and it comes to an end in this way. My heart goes out to anyone whos been through or is currently going through a redundancy process.

    On the day I found out our redundancy date, I felt numb. I thought I would feel differently. It felt just like any other announcement. Following my mental health struggles, I couldn’t be bothered sorting out the admin and conversations involved in leaving. I wouldn’t feel satisfied until I had left the company and the redundancy money was in my bank.

    Jobless, ‘unemployed’ was soon going to be my label. All of a sudden I felt a lack of self-confidence. A lack of security. An urge to review my money situation and sort out bills that still needed paying, with one less income. But I still had not recovered fully and didn’t have the energy. A battle between wanting to prioritise myself for once, but lacking the motivation to do so. 

    10 days to go – the worst 10 days of my life

    10 days to go. Then I would be unemployed. Something I never anticipated I would be happy about. Finally, done and dusted with the workplace that I once loved, but then also caused me unreasonable amounts of stress.

    To deal with the anger, I started journaling my feelings. I thought, what’s the point in stressing about this when I had 10 days to go. But bear in mind, that I was now a different person. More protective of my mental health. I viewed life differently. It was great I had grown in confidence to change the situation that broke me. But I was still in the situation that broke me. And I was still facing the same daily battles that sent me to hell and back.

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    Looking back 

    Maybe these heightened feelings are normal for anyone going through a redundancy process. It’s probably just part of the process and how your mind accepts the huge change which will be happening to you at any moment. A moment someone else chooses, usually based on money-making and not paying any attention to your life.

    The current employment situation in the UK

    I can tell you, from my recent experience of visiting the job centre, unstable job conditions have impacted a lot of people and the department is inundated. The knock-on effect of COVID, and greedy CEOs making reckless decisions, together with a failing economy, have created a recipe for disaster. And it’s set to get even worse!

    Yes, there are jobs out there, but the game has changed. I’m hoping the shift will eventually benefit office workers and companies to start to value mental health. I hope EVERYONE starts to place the same physical illness value on mental illness. Especially after we’ve all endured so much trauma lately. 

    my new beginning

    Download the mental health check-in sheet

    Mental health check-in Download

    You may have questions

    Some of you might be asking why I went back to the workplace at all. Well, I wanted and deserved the redundancy payment. I also deserved to be treated like a human being. Bear in mind, that I am an advocate for mental well-being and society ditching the stigma those with mental illnesses suffer. I couldn’t just let this situation slide, without showing up and standing up for myself. In turn, I felt like I was also standing up for other people.

    I considered raising concerns, then I weighed this up against the mental exhaustion this would exert and the potential of really gaining anything. In the end, I cut my losses and decided to start putting my energy into my new life. 

    Work should be a complementary part of our lives, not the thing that makes it unliveable

    Huffington Post
    my new beginning

    How my experience applies to all workplaces

    Mental health training in the workplace

    TO clarify, I’m all for mental health training in the workplace. But it has to be great training, run by people who’ve experienced dealing with a mental health crisis first hand. It can’t just be another set of standard lines companies use to protect themselves.

    Trusted training resources

    Mind conducts workplace training and I would trust them as a great resource. It’s also great to see the training by Rethink Mental Illness had input from people with lived experience. There are also other smaller companies running mental health training and there is value out there.

    Workplaces – please create a different process for mental health absences

    Another significant issue that made me feel like my mental illness wasn’t valid, was the return to work process. Workplaces need to create different policies for mental health circumstances. As they would do a terminal illness or a bereavement. Any other unusual situation, which doesn’t fit into the category of physical health.

    My hope for HR departments in the future

    Whilst I don’t have personal experience of it, I hope other employers are already doing the great things I’ve suggested. I hope this blog post doesn’t need to be read by most companies, but my own experience was just a stand-alone negative one. In conducting some research for this post I found this promising article about HR awards won by a building society. I wish all businesses would adopt this approach.

    It’s also important for HR to check the company ethos is being implemented in all departments. And ensure there isn’t a disconnect between individual departments.

    The main point

    My life is different and much happier, and I now have support in my new workplace. And I am thankful for the journey because it taught me so much about my mental strength in challenging times.

    Worrying statistics

    The statistics for mental health-related absences in the UK look grim. And some of the research was conducted pre-pandemic. Arguably, we are in a worse position currently. Worst still, people are sometimes dismissed as a result of their mental health struggles.

    How can we continue to accept this treatment?

    my new beginning

    One final note about burnout

    Whilst I am still trying to make sense of what happened to me, I faced complete burnout as a result of overdoing it. I want to take this opportunity to tell all my readers this is not the way you have to live. Yes, we all need money. Both I and my hubby have to work to pay bills and live, but it is possible to balance this with looking after your mental health.

    My wish for the future is that employers become the ones who prioritise this on behalf of their employees. And they avoid creating a culture where people feel they need to do more for the same money. Employ more staff, reduce the workload, and spend money to ease pressure on your staff!

    Will you ever recover from burnout? I have. Granted, I am not the same person I was before. I now take less rubbish and I know, my boundaries. I won’t ever allow a repeat of this situation.

    Final thoughts

    This is my journal of a tough time in my life. In keeping with the theme of this blog, I wanted to share this with you because I want to help other people in the same situation. I want other people to realise they are not alone. Thankfully, I have recently started a new chapter in my career and I am in a better place.

    Let time know what you think of the post in the comments below. I would love to hear from you.

    Because this is such an emotive issue for me, it would be great to hear from anyone who can relate. Your comments are much appreciated and it helps me and other people know we are not alone in our struggles.

    signature my new beginning
    Family, Mental Health, Parenting tips, Relationships, Toddlers

    How to Explore Emotions With Your Toddler

    , 27 Comments

    It is a proven fact, that the early years of our lives shape who we are and how well we cope with challenges in adult life. A traumatic experience in childhood can have lasting effects. Exploring emotions is vital.

    All human beings have emotions. They start to develop at an early age, often when toddlers don’t really understand what they are yet. The common one in our house at the moment is missing other people. This involves a daily conversation filled with reassurance, that everyone misses the people they love.

    Because toddler emotions are a challenge I currently face. And I know other parents definitely go through this cycle, I wanted to write a post dedicated to the best stories I could find, discussing children’s emotions.

    Quick note: Mummy Conquering Anxiety is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program. Some of the links contained on this page are affiliate links and if you go through them to make a purchase, I will earn a commission. I only recommend products I use myself and think would be useful for other people

    Let’s look at the research into why we should explore emotions

    Why emotions are important

    Understanding children’s emotions are critical to understanding their behaviour. Early years children feel a range of emotions, but often cannot express, interpret or process them like us.

    With poor emotional skills, it could be harder for children to learn:

    • acceptance
    • resilience
    • confidence and control
    • how to articulate experiences
    • a sense of identity
    • empathy
    • a sense of self

    What Is Social and Emotional Development

    Children grow and develop rapidly in their first five years across the four main areas of development. These areas are motor (physical), communication and language, cognitive, social and emotional.
     
    Social and emotional development means how children start to understand who they are, what they are feeling and what to expect when interacting with others. It is the development of being able to:

    • Form and sustain positive relationships.
    • Experience, manage and express emotions.
    • Explore and engage with the environment.

    Positive social and emotional development is important. This development influences a child’s self-confidence, empathy, the ability to develop meaningful and lasting friendships and partnerships, and a sense of importance and value to those around them. Children’s social and emotional development also influences all other areas of development.

    Parents and caregivers play the biggest role in social/emotional development because they offer the most consistent relationships for their children. Consistent experiences with family members, teachers and other adults help children learn about relationships and explore emotions in predictable interactions.

    To nurture your child’s social and emotional development, it is important that you engage in quality interactions like these on a daily basis, depending on the age of your child:

    • Be affectionate and nurturing: hold, comfort, talk and sing with your baby, toddler and child.
    • Help your baby experience joy in “give-and-take” relationships by playing games like “peek-a-boo.”
    • Provide your toddler with responsive care, letting them practice new skills while still providing hands-on help.
    • Support your child’s developing skills; help him/her, but don’t do everything for your child, even if it takes longer or is messy.
    • Teach social and emotional skills, such as taking turns, listening and resolving conflict.

    What happens if we don’t manage emotions

    One of the most important ways parents or guardians can help is by listening to their children and taking their feelings seriously. They may want a hug, they may want you to help them change something or they may want practical help.

    Children and young people’s negative feelings usually pass. However, it’s a good idea to get help if your child is distressed for a long time if their feelings are stopping them from getting on with their lives, if their distress is disrupting family life or if they are repeatedly behaving in ways you wouldn’t expect at their age.

    Mentalhealth.org.uk

    Let’s dive into the list of stories that explore emotions with toddlers and children

    Explore Emotions

    What’s Troubling Tawny?

    What’s Troubling Tawny? The award-winning second book in the Sumatran Trilogy! Tawny longs to make friends with another rhino, but her shyness holds her back. When she meets a hornbill called Tallulah, she is surprised to learn that she has a lot in common with the beautiful bird.

    The Problem With Poppy

    Poppy the porcupine has always wanted to make a friend, but her defensive nature prevents her. When a young tiger cub stumbles upon her one day in the rainforest, she reacts badly and scares him away.

    Determined to change her ways, she sets out to find him, but little does she know that the tiger cub is about to have a problem of his own. In the face of danger, will Poppy find a way to save the day?

    The Problem with Poppy is the award-winning debut picture book by British author Emma Sandford. Illustrated by Ukrainian artist Olena Osadcha.

    Sarah’s Shadow

    If you could change something about yourself, would you do it?

    When Sarah Simpkins is teased about her shadow in the school playground, she finds herself wishing she didn’t have one.

    That night she has the chance to make the wish come true. But will losing her shadow really make her happy?

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    Let’s Be Friends Again

    Purchase the book below:

    Let’s Be Friends Again

    Kids World Books – Sibling fights, tantrums and subsequent bonding is the theme of this story.

    The story is narrated by a boy and he narrates rather than shares his experiences with his sister. The boy and the girl play together. They spend most of their leisure time together. Just like every sibling, they fight often and bond subsequently.

    The boy finds some trouble with his sister. The boy sometimes babysits for his sister and she used to trouble him! However, she was a good listener and the boy used to tell some great stories. The boy refused to share his toys with her. Yet, the smart girl used to grab all her brother’s toys. The tantrum began when the girl played with his brother’s pet turtle!

    The girl thought that the tank where the pet turtle was kept was too small for the turtle. She carried it to the pond and let it free in the pond.

    The boy was as angry as he lost his pet turtle. He showed his anger in many ways. He shouted at her. He threw away his toys and kept on thinking about his turtle. His parents supported his sister. He planned to avenge the loss of his pet and imagined many things. (This is definitely a fun part that everyone would die laughing).

    He couldn’t sleep for hours thinking about the pet. He then saw his sister playing in the garden so happy like never before. The boy was surprised as well as very angry seeing her sister happy.

    He made a decision! What was that?

    Let’s be friends again, the lovable brother and sister, their cute fights, rivalry, etc are narrated beautifully. It happens very commonly in every household.

    Children and young people are still developing – they don’t have adult brains or bodies, so need help to understand and manage their emotions.

    You’ve probably heard your parents or grandparents say “they’re just attention seeking” or “they’re being difficult”. But there’s usually more to it than this.

    We often ask people who contact Children 1st Parentline: “What is your child trying to tell you when they’re acting like that?” Looked at this way, unwanted behaviour is usually about a child needing something – or their way of trying to work out how to manage something.

    From a toddler’s need for comfort to a teenager’s conflicting desires for independence and security, testing behaviour is common and is often set off by everyday experiences rather than big events.

    Children1st.org.uk

    When Worley gets Brave

    Explore Emotions

    READ ABOUT THE AUTHOR:

    Jodi also thinks the book will come just at the right time for children who have had to shut themselves away all year and might be scared to try something new.

    She added: “It is a lovely story for 4–7-year-olds about taking yourself out of your comfort zone to try new things.

    “Worley’s story is a fab way to engage children with these cute little monsters and learn how to develop their confidence.

    “The book also included suggested activities for parent and adult readers.

    “I’m also now writing my second story for the series about Worley and Co!

    When Worley gets Angry

    Explore Emotions

    How to teach children how to deal with anger, through the character of Worley and his friends.

    READ ABOUT THE AUTHOR:

    She has produced books – which tell the story of very special monsters who face different emotions – in her efforts to help children talk about their feelings.

    “Having suffered quite a bit as a kid – I lost my dad at 10 and my best friend at 14 – and had a lot of bullying and not nice things going on and I didn’t know how to cope,” she explained.

    “That had a massive effect on me as an adult which led to a breakdown. I don’t want kids to go through what I did. The more people I can teach and I can help the better. I don’t think I would have had as big a meltdown if I already had tools to use.

    “My characters are all monsters – I have a whole tribe of emotions monsters that teach children about emotions. Worley is the main one and he meets his friends with different emotions.

    “The first one was teaching him to be brave and through the monster, you learn you might make a mistake but it will be fine. He realises he doesn’t need to be the best at everything.

    “The second book is about anger. The book is written as a rhyme; basically, Worley gets angry and doesn’t know what it is. His friend George, the angry monster, teaches him it is ok to be angry and how to manage it.

    “It is done in quite a fun way so children can understand.”

    Explore Emotions

    Buster Finds His Beat

    Purchase the book below:

    Buster Finds His Beat

    A feel-good story about an autistic boy,
    That will capture your imagination and fill you with joy.

    Buster uses ear defenders to soften sounds he hears,
    Find out what happens when he faces his fears…

    Pick up your copy, you’ll be in for a treat,
    As he uses the power of sound to find his own beat.

    Explore Emotions

    Hector

    The first book in a new rhyming picture book series from D.M. Mullan and Kirsteen Harris Jones – welcome to D.M. Mullan’s Curious Tales… Hector van Groat If something is missing, and you’re feeling blue, you could learn from Hector, who feels this way too. This little genius lives in an upside-down boat, and he grunts from his hill like a grumpy old goat. “Hector van Groat needs no one but Hector because he is a genius, a crazy inventor”.

    Explore Emotions

    Where Is My Smile?

    A beautifully illustrated picture book about mental health for young readers. Where Is My Smile? is the story of a little boy who can’t find his smile anywhere. He searches and searches, but it’s nowhere to be found. Where could his smile be? This delightful picture book is perfect as a bedtime story, and to help little children understand that it’s okay to be sad sometimes, but we can always find our way through it.

    Final Thoughts

    I hope you enjoyed reading my list of books to inspire conversations with your toddler about emotions.

    Do you have any of these books? Or will you be purchasing them? What techniques do you use to explore emotions?

    I would love to hear from you in the comments below.

    Explore Emotions
    Guest posts, Mental Health, Pregnancy, Tools for managing anxiety

    Why a sleep routine is important for a newborn

    , 12 Comments

    Today I am so excited to welcome a guest blogger! I am also over the moon to introduce a mummy, also facing difficult issues with a newborn. I can relate to this. My guest blogger today has turned a negative experience of her own into something to help others. All the details you need to connect with Lauryn can be found at the end of this post.

    POST UPDATED 30 July 2022

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      Let’s dive into why a sleep routine is important

      I felt very ready to have a baby in every sense. I was 32 years old and financially secure. It was great that I had a successful teaching career of ten years and my relationship was strong. 

      As a confessed perfectionist, when we fell pregnant, I did all of the homework to be fully prepared. We did an online hypnobirthing course together. I planned my drug-free, calm labour. In addition, I planned to breathe the baby out (LOL) simply. I also knew all there was to know about the fourth trimester. I was, of course going to breastfeed. It was on the agenda to get started early with a bedtime routine. Additionally, I planned to be back in the gym from six weeks postnatal. I also signed up for lots of baby classes with my NCT friends. 

      I had all of the right things to ensure a sound night’s sleep for our baby. The right clothes, crib, mattress, baby monitor, and dream sheep to get her sleeping easily. You name it, we had it. 

      sleep routine

      Finally, eight days after my due date, I started feeling labour pains. My feelings were weirdly nervous and excited. I just could not wait to meet this baby I felt so connected to during the pregnancy. Preparing, I calmly got my hypnobirthing tools ready. Bouncing on my ball, candles lit, and a comedy video, had me feeling prepared. 

      My labour did not go as planned. After 30 hours, I ended up having an emergency C-section and my daughter came out with suspected sepsis and was whisked straight off to neonatal care. 

      Once I got home, all the planning we had done during pregnancy felt pointless. I felt beyond unprepared for this responsibility. Breastfeeding was not working for us and I felt like the ultimate failure in getting the formula out. My daughter had classic colic and cried for 3-6 hours every evening. It was exhausting and I felt awful I was unable to console her. 

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      The anxiety set in

      How had I gone from feeling as if I knew exactly what to expect, to this? I realised that one thing no one had told me might come with new motherhood. Anxiety. 

      I have never been an overly anxious person, but all of a sudden every aspect of motherhood was anxiety-inducing. Breastfeeding, sleep, guests coming over, leaving the house. All of it. My plans to go to classes and groups were far too big for me to face and I was so anxious about guests coming in case she would cry and I would not be able to settle her. 

      How lockdown impacted the situation

      Eight weeks after she was born, we were plunged into the very first lockdown. This was great for me because it meant I didn’t have to face my anxiety about going out or guests coming over. Although in hindsight, there were negative aspects, because it didn’t give me a chance to talk to professionals, as medical visits and access to health visitors had ceased. 

      To regain control, I started a very rigid sleep routine with my little one. Every nap had to be to the minute of my new programme. The sleep environment had to be perfect. If it ever went out of the window, it was a huge stress for me and could ruin my entire lockdown day. 

      Light at the end of the tunnel

      Needless to say, I realised it was time to do some mental digging and see what was going on. I opened up to friends who had suffered postnatally and searched for information online. After thinking about it, I eventually concluded that anxiety was linked to birth trauma. I had not given myself the chance to go over my labour or the fact she was taken straight from me due to being ill upon arrival.

      Once I did a little work on myself through the lockdown, the pressure I’d put myself under started to lift.  I introduced yoga, meditation, and journaling into my routine.

      Turning a negative into a positive

      I eased up a little on the sleep routine and now two years down the line I have trained to become a sleep consultant to work with families on gentle sleep schedules and training, to cause the least anxiety possible.  

      If anyone out there is new to this parenting gig and finding things tough, open up. Talk it out when you’re ready and know that this storm will pass and get better. More beautiful days are coming your way. 

      Lauryn and her little one

      sleep routine

      Angelcare were fantastic for all of our baby’s needs when we had a newborn. Check them out.

      More details on how to contact Lauryn

      Lauryn has worked as a full-time teacher for 10 years, teaching Drama and English in both primary and secondary settings. Since having her first child, Eliza, she realised the importance of sleep for well-being and this led to her training to become a sleep consultant in Summer 2021. Lullaby Lauryn launched in October and she can’t wait to help as many families as possible improve their sleep. 

      You can find her website here

      She can also be contacted on Instagram and Facebook.

      Final thoughts

      I hope you enjoyed reading this guest post about why a sleep routine is important.

      Feel free to leave your thoughts in the comments below and let me know whether you’ve checked out Lauryn’s amazing website.

      signature sleep routine

      Mental Health, self-care, Tools for managing anxiety, wellness

      10 Ways To Improve Your Mental Well-being In Winter

      , 8 Comments

      I don’t always want to put the work in to protect my mental health. Keeping on top of it sometimes becomes a chore and the rebellious side of my personality wants to give up. But I don’t! Whilst I have weeks where I am just not feeling it. If I don’t have time for self-care, I usually catch myself and urgently utilise some much-needed mental well-being techniques I have in my toolbox.

      I would encourage anyone else out to keep maintaining a good standard of mental well-being. Especially during the winter months.

      Why do we as humans know how to physically rest, but we have a problem with guilt when it comes to looking after our mental health?

      Quick note: Some of the links contained on this page are affiliate links. If you go through an affiliate link to make a purchase, I will earn a commission. I only recommend products I use myself and think would be helpful for other people.

      mental well-being

      You might have already seen my TikTok where I talk about my current feelings. I can’t shake the feeling of wanting to hibernate until March 2023. I feel lower than usual and have to work harder than ever to keep my head above water.

      I’ve written on the blog before about Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) and how this can have an impact on our mental health.

      I already have anxiety problems, which can sometimes lead to low periods and depression.

      As I said in the TikTok video, each year I forget just how bad I feel. Lack of vitamin D, limited natural light and horrible, cold weather can impact our bodies negatively. Which can lead to implications for our mental and emotional well-being.

      Here are my tips for maintaining a good standard of mental well-being during the winter months, including some worksheets to help you…

      @mummyconqueringan

      As of last weekend, I definitely feel pretty low mentally. Especially when it’s dark all day & the rain won’t stop. At this point, I feel like it will rain until March 2023 & I just want to hide under the duvet until then. For anyone currently feeling the same, some helpful tips will be posted on the blog over the weekend. Hope it helps ❤️❤️❤️ #mentalhealth #mentalhealthmatters #mentalhealthawareness #sad #seasonaldepression

      ♬ Chill Vibes – Tollan Kim

      1. MAKE time for self-care

      I know it’s challenging to fit in time for self-care. And society still holds the opinion that resting and relaxing is wasting your time or pure laziness. This couldn’t be further from the truth!

      Not looking after myself or getting enough sleep for a few months, led me to have a full mental breakdown. It then took me 18 months to fully recover.

      If you’re a gym goer, you will understand rest days. Similarly, if you walk a lot for your job, you sit down at night and physically rest. Why do we as humans know how to physically rest, but we have a problem with guilt when it comes to looking after our mental health?

      Make some time. Even five minutes can help you. I am now well-practised at meditation and can complete a hypnotherapy recording in five minutes. It may not seem like a lot of time, but it helps.

      2. Plan in self-care time to avoid burnout

      Felling low, and becoming irritable can creep up on us and we don’t always consciously know what’s happening. Allocating specific days and times for self-care can help.

      I personally tell my hubby in advance that I will need childcare cover. To complete the hypnotherapy mediations, I then find a quiet room and some time to myself, without a toddler bothering me. I dedicate at least 90% of my time to her care, needs and spending time as a family. 20-30 minutes to refresh myself isn’t a lot to ask. And we shouldn’t feel guilty as parents when we need to ask for this time out.

      3. Use some tools to assist you in your journey

      Because of my history of mental health problems, I now have a toolkit on hand for my low moments. These are some of the things in there:

      Meditation recordings saved to my phone

      Mental health apps on my phone

      Anxiety workbooks on the shelf next to where I work at home

      Adult colouring books on my desk

      I always stock up on bathtime self-care products

      Candles, wax melts, burners

      My light therapy box

      Light Therapy Box
      Salt Lamp

      Blankets, fluffy dressing gown

      mental well-being
      Some of the things which make me feel better

      4. Talk to someone

      In the mental health community, we all know talking to someone can be powerful. And it helps. In the aftermath of my mental breakdown, making connections with like-minded people, pulled me out of the fog and allowed me to move forward.

      You might be reluctant to make social connections and I know the feeling of just wanting to hide away. But please talk to someone if you need to!

      5. Change your routine

      Stepping outside your comfort zone and doing something you wouldn’t normally do, can help break the depression cycle in your brain. For me, it became sitting in the local park, soaking in nature and literally putting myself back together.

      Even walking a different way home from the park, during those dark moments in my mind, helped me. I felt very much like my brain wouldn’t reboot. But these different habits started to fill me with confidence and allowed me to think slightly differently. Gain a new perspective on life.

      6. Do some exercise

      Exercise alone won’t cure you of your mental struggles, but it will help you to feel better along the way. During those dark days, it can get you moving and out of the house. And slowly, you start to tackle other challenges.

      Here are some other resources on the blog which may be helpful for you:

      BLOG POST – 12 BOOKS & COURSES FOR MANAGING ANXIETY

      In this post, I include some great books about managing anxiety, written by those with lived experience. There are also some great workbooks to manage stress, which I still use to this day!

      RESOURCES PAGE – TOOLS FOR MANAGING ANXIETY

      This page features a range of workbooks that I personally use. And a summary of all the mental health-related blogs I have written previously.

      RESOURCES PAGE – PARENTING RESOURCES

      Parenting is a challenging time. Lack of sleep, a completely new routine and not having a clue how to look after a child, can all take a toll. I am actively adding to this page for any parents out there who may be struggling,

      RESOURCES PAGE – THE PERMA HYPNOTHERAPY SERIES

      On this page, I share my journey of completing a Perma hypnotherapy course. And how it benefitted me massively. If it’s something you’ve considered, check out the blog posts.

      DEDICATED PAGE – BOOK CORNER

      Because reading helps me mentally, it was only right to dedicate a page to all things books. I am now even reading stories from other writers about their own mental health journeys.

      mental well-being

      7. Take your vitamins

      I must admit, I sometimes forget to take my vitamins for a few days and I usually don’t feel great when it happens. I now take a vitamin D supplement, which helps me throughout the year, but especially in winter.

      Everyone is different and will need a different supplement to fuel their bodies. Get some advice, or look into what works best for you.

      8. Get enough sleep

      I know from experience, some people just cannot get enough sleep. For a new mother, it just isn’t possible. Prior to motherhood, I never slept well because I had thoughts whirling through my mind all the time. So I get it.

      If you can, try and get 7-8 hours of sleep, or however much your body needs. This is the time when our body repairs itself and it is therefore vital to our well-being.

      9. Positive thinking

      For me personally, positive thinking is about having affirmation cards littered around my workspace. It is also doing meditation recordings which contain powerful, life-changing messages. Mostly, it is being aware that our thoughts can impact us positively or negatively. And trying to turn things around if I am not having a great time mentally.

      affirmations

      10. Be kind to yourself

      The winter months can be harsh on both our minds and bodies. Do whatever it takes to be kind to yourself. Have an ice cream, and jump in bed for a nap. Spend time under the duvet. And don’t feel guilty for looking after yourself.

      Final Thoughts

      Every human being is different and will respond to these techniques and tools differently. I personally found that combining a range of these different strategies and tools, helped me become well enough to get through the dark days and then focus on mentally recovering.

      Free download

      I’ve created a self-care planner, where you can list all the areas you want to focus on. There are four sections, and each allows you to focus on a different area of your life. To bring an overall sense of well-being.

      mental well-being
      Self-Care-PlannerDownload

      Other resources if you are struggling with your mental health

      If you need someone to talk to about difficult feelings, The Samaritans are available 24/7. Call 116 121 for free any time. email jo@samaritans.org or visit some branches in person

      Mind – Infoline: 0300 123 3393 – this helpline provides information and signposting. (open 9 am to 6 pm, Monday to Friday (except for bank holidays).

      Anxiety UK – they have a helpline: 03444 775 774 Text support: 07537 416 905 (open Mon-Fri 09:30 am-5:30 pm)

      The Stay Alive app is a pocket suicide prevention resource for the UK, packed full of useful information to help you stay safe

      Shout –  If you would prefer not to talk but want some mental health support, you can text SHOUT to 85258. Shout offers a confidential 24/7 text service providing support if you are in crisis and need immediate help

      SANEline – If you’re experiencing a mental health problem or supporting someone else, you can call SANEline on 0300 304 7000 (4.30 pm–10.30 pm every day).

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      Mental Health, wellness

      Understanding the Causes of Stress and How to Overcome Them

      , 2 Comments

      Stress is a common experience for many people, and it can profoundly impact mental and physical health. In this blog post, we will explore the various ways to cope with stress better and develop strategies to manage its effects. We’ll discuss how to recognize stress triggers, identify healthy coping strategies, and incorporate techniques such as relaxation techniques and mindfulness into your daily routine. Finally, we’ll look at various available resources to help you deal with stress effectively. Whether you’re just beginning to feel overwhelmed or looking for long-term solutions, this guide will provide some useful guidance on managing stress in your life. Ready to reduce the causes of stress?

      causes of stress

      What is Stress?

      Stress is defined as the emotional and physical strain caused by our response to pressure from the outside world. It can originate from a wide range of sources, such as work, family responsibilities, relationships, health concerns, or significant life changes. While some amount of stress is normal and even beneficial in certain situations, prolonged or excessive levels can lead to a variety of physical and mental health problems.

      Causes of Stress

      Stress can be caused by a variety of factors, including difficult life situations such as job loss and family issues or even seemingly manageable things like work deadlines. Other common stress triggers include financial problems, health concerns, relationship issues, and time pressures. Some people may also experience causes of stress in response to unexpected events such as natural disasters or personal tragedies.

      Recognizing Stress Triggers

      The first step in managing your stress is to identify the things that trigger it. Pay attention to your physical and emotional reactions when you feel overwhelmed, and try to pinpoint what triggered your reaction. Once you know what causes your stress, you can begin to develop strategies for dealing with it more effectively.

      Signs and Symptoms of Stress

      The signs and symptoms of stress can vary from person to person but generally include physical symptoms such as headaches, muscle tension, fatigue, digestive issues, and skin problems. Mental health symptoms include difficulty concentrating, difficulty sleeping or sleeping too much, irritability or mood swings, anxiety, and depression. Other common signs include feeling overwhelmed or constantly in a rush; lacking motivation; avoiding social situations; procrastination; frequent crying spells, and reduced productivity at work.

      Understanding Your Response to Stress

      It is crucial to understand how your body responds to different levels of stress in order to develop strategies for managing it more effectively. Common responses to stress can include increased heart rate, shallow breathing, muscle tension, and feeling overwhelmed. Recognizing these signs in yourself can help to identify when it is time to take a break from a stressful situation.

      Coping Strategies

      Stress is an inevitable part of life and can be challenging to manage. However, learning how to cope with stress and practice self-care effectively is essential for maintaining good physical, mental and emotional health. Developing healthy habits such as engaging in regular physical activity, practising mindfulness, eating well, and creating routines or calendars can help reduce stress levels daily. By implementing these strategies into your lifestyle, you will start to feel more relaxed and better equipped to handle any challenges that come your way. Additionally, seeking professional help, if necessary, is also crucial in managing thoughts or feelings that are overwhelming or disruptive.

      Benefits of Physical Exercise for Reducing Stress

      Regular physical activity can help to counter the adverse effects of stress. Exercise releases endorphins that can improve your mood and reduce feelings of depression, anxiety, and fatigue. Additionally, it helps to strengthen your body’s natural defences against stress-related illnesses such as high blood pressure or heart disease. A combination of aerobic exercise (such as running), strength training (such as weightlifting), stretching, and relaxation techniques are all beneficial for managing stress levels.

      Eating Healthy Key to Managing Anxiety and Stress

      Eating a balanced and nutritious diet is essential for managing stress. Eating foods rich in antioxidants, vitamins, and minerals can help improve mood and reduce feelings of fatigue or irritability. Making dietary changes such as eating more fresh fruits and vegetables and reducing your intake of processed foods, sugary snacks, or caffeine can help to reduce stress levels. Avoiding processed foods and caffeine and getting enough sleep can also contribute to better overall health, which will help with your ability to cope with stressful situations. Avoiding overeating is also crucial, as this can lead to feeling sluggish, irritable, or anxious, which can further contribute to stress.

      Mindfulness Practices: An Effective Tool in Dealing with Stress

      Mindfulness practices such as meditation, yoga, and tai chi are beneficial techniques for reducing stress levels. By intentionally bringing awareness to your present moment experience and allowing yourself to observe thoughts, feelings, and sensations without judgment, you can recognize patterns in how you respond to stressful situations.

      Organizing Your Time: Creating Calendars; Routines

      Creating routines and calendars for managing your daily activities can help make you feel more organized, reducing feelings of overwhelm and anxiety associated with stress. By planning out your day, you can prioritize tasks and create a more structured method of managing workloads. This will help to make sure that all necessary tasks are completed in a timely manner, leaving room for moments of relaxation or enjoyment.

      Prioritizing Self-Care

      It is important to remember that your well-being comes first. It is easy to get caught up in work or daily tasks, but it is essential to take time out for yourself in order to relax and focus on your own needs. Prioritizing self-care activities such as getting enough sleep, spending time with loved ones, taking breaks from screens, journaling, and practising relaxation techniques can help to reduce stress levels and improve your overall well-being.

      Seeking Professional Help

      Suppose stress has a significant impact on your daily life. In that case, it may be beneficial to seek professional help from a counsellor or therapist who can provide more effective strategies for managing your responses. Talking about how you feel with someone trained in mental health issues can help to alleviate anxious thoughts or feelings of despair. Delta 8 Gummies could also be used as an additional tool for managing stress levels. These gummies are derived from hemp plants and contain CBD, which has been proven to reduce anxiety and stress levels. The gummies are available in a variety of flavours, making them an easy-to-use option for those looking for a quick way to relax and destress.

      Simple Tips for Everyday Living that Promote Well-Being and Reduce Stress Levels

      Living a healthy lifestyle that is balanced and manageable can reduce stress levels. Taking time for yourself to engage in activities or hobbies that you enjoy, getting enough sleep, spending time with friends and family, laughing more often, creating boundaries between work and home life, and setting achievable goals are all simple strategies that can be used on a daily basis. Additionally, learning how to say no to tasks or requests that exceed your ability to manage them effectively can also help reduce feelings of stress and overwhelm.

      Stress is an inevitable part of life, and it is essential to learn how to manage it effectively. Finding the right mix of activities that work best for you on an individual basis is key to reducing stress levels and promoting overall well-being. Remember to be kind to yourself, take a break when needed, reach out for professional support if required, and don’t forget to have fun along the way. With these tips in mind, you will soon find yourself better equipped to cope with life’s challenges with confidence.

      causes of stress
      Mental Health, wellness

      6 Key Tools I Use for Mental Well-being Self Maintenance

      , 8 Comments

      In the final stages of recovery from my mental breakdown, it was about putting tools in place to survive daily life from now on. Understanding my triggers has helped me reduce the mental impact of certain situations. In this respect, self-maintenance is required.

      For example, I know lack of sleep impacts me negatively. Therefore, I have rest or a nap if it’s needed, and I have time to do so. Meditation has also allowed me to feel refreshed, without spending too much of my time on this activity. Practice makes perfect!

      We need to start treating mental well-being maintenance with the same importance as physical wellbeing maintenance.

      Quick note: Some of the links on this page are affiliate links; if you go through them to make a purchase, I will earn a commission. I only recommend products I use myself and think would be useful for you.

      self-maintenance

      Even when I feel mentally well, I now understand that ongoing self-maintenance is required. A runner doesn’t just go for one run, and then stop. We need to start treating mental well-being maintenance with the same importance as physical well-being maintenance.

      It’s essential I build on the foundations of self-maintenance I discuss below.

      Positive thinking 

      Every single day since my mental breakdown, I’ve worked hard to replace negative thoughts with positive ones and try not to let my mind run away with itself. The blog has helped and I feel like I’ve processed a lot of emotions by writing about my experiences. 

      I also now understand that we manifest and create the world we live in, from our thoughts. Whether these are positive or negative can have an impact on our well-being and our outlook on life.

      Planning time for self-care 

      Regardless of your circumstances, we live in a fast-paced and busy world. It is easy to tell ourselves we are too busy, or tired to fit in self-care and self-maintenance. But it must be done. Constant self-care was one of the main factors in recovering from my mental breakdown. I was forced to be kind to myself. And I’ve continued this far beyond recovery.

      Meditation for self-maintenance

      You may have already viewed my page on my blog, following my hypnotherapy journey. Because of this transformative course, I am now well-practised at mediating and I get huge benefits from doing this.

      Life Coaching 

      Life coaching is something I tried in the past, but I recently opted for the hypnotherapy course instead. The sessions are made up of assisting you in finding your power and the path you want to take – so essentially it is life coaching with the addition of some other concrete tools you can use for the rest of your life.

      Maintaining connections 

      I have written on the blog before about hiding away from social situations during my anxiety-filled days. Making new connections and being honest with my family and friends about my struggles, allowed me to heal. Following my breakdown, the support network I had was vital.

      I now make a point of ditching any relationship which doesn’t serve me (not everyone in life is supposed to get along). And I seek out, value and nurture connections which align with my values. Favouring like-minded people has allowed me to finally attain the career I want and be surrounded by people who want to help others. All of which have a positive impact on my mental well-being.

      Affirmations for self-maintenance

      If you follow the blog, you will know I have affirmation cards dotted around the house, Particularly around my workspace, to motivate me and encourage me to think positively. Especially if I am having a bad day.

      The ones I use are centred around career, empowerment and confidence. But there are so many other decks available, depending on your preference. Maybe you want a journal to record gratitude or affirmations in a different format. Take a look at the various options below:

      Waterstones

      Absolute Affirmations: 44 Positive Affirmation Cards

      Power Thought Cards: 64 Positive Affirmation Cards for Self-Love, Motivation, and Healing

      Tranquillity Cards: Seaside Serenity: 48 Mindful Affirmation Cards for Daily Meditation (Paperback)

      Stress Less: 80 Tips and Affirmation Cards to Help You Find Calm

      Zelo Journal

      Good Vibes Journal
      Unwind Guided Journal

      LSW

      LSW Mind notes
      LSW Mind Cards

      Final thoughts

      I hope you enjoyed reading this post.

      Do you use affirmation cards for self-maintenance? Would they work for you?

      I would love to hear from you in the comments below.

      self-maintenance

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